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Old 10-07-2012, 04:54 PM   #1
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Unhappy His anger is really coming between us

My boyfriend has bad anger issues its so bad that sometimes he finds hImself havig no idea what happened or what he did . He used to be so loving towards me and showed his love for me everyday all day . But now he yells at me if i dont dothings exactly like he does or gets mad over somethig he heard wrong orthat never happened . But he has his moments where he wins me over again . He tends to spend all his money on weed and never me on my birthday he didnt even get me a card . And was grumpy At my party because he couldnt smoke . And he constantly talks about girls and how he is gonna do this and make lots of friends that are girls and partying with girls . And how he could grt another girl if he wanted . But than he apologizes and kisses up . But himdoing this all the time reLly starts to hurt to the point i question his love for me . But im so in love i would do anthig for him . And he never wants to hang around me with his friends. But other girls can . And i just dont know what to do with his anger or the stuff he does to make me mad .

 
Old 10-07-2012, 05:38 PM   #2
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Re: His anger is really coming between us

You need to realize that it's nothing that you can do to change him. He has a very serious rage problem and you're the one getting the outbursts. It doesn't matter what you do, how well you do it, or how much to his specifications you do it, because he will always keep finding things wrong with it. That is reality. Reality is that you won't ever please him because he is mentally ill. It doesn't matter how much you love him, you're not going to be able to change him ever.

Listen, this is the same old story that i've seen hundreds of times on this message board. I've been on this board a long time and i've seen the women giving every excuse under the sun for why their boyfriend or husband is always angry and it's always the woman thinking she can change the man's temper. The answer is no, that won't ever happen. In none of those instances did things ever get better, in fact in every instance it got worse, sometimes much worse. You're going to sooner or later end up another statistic if you don't get out of this relationship. You can love him all day long until the cows come home but he is a horrible boyfriend and a bad person and the smartest thing you can do is get rid of him.

Your story is no different than the hundreds of others just like this on here. It never gets better, that is reality. To think anything will ever change for the better and stay better is living in fantasy land and has no bearing on reality. It's time you start realizing that and leave him now before he completely destroys your self esteem and possibly physically hurts you.

 
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Old 10-07-2012, 06:12 PM   #3
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Re: His anger is really coming between us

You have anger issues confused with bullying psycho behaviour. Kszan is totally correct - this is who he is. It is only a matter of time before a physical assault happens, then that is your life from then on. If he was so sweet at the beginning, that is a HUGE red flag. Clealy he can control his "anger" to get what he wants. What has happened is that, now that he has you he is not bothering to hide his nature. You can leave on your own feet now, or via the ER down the track. Sorry, it is pretty easy to predict. Sera

 
Old 10-07-2012, 08:25 PM   #4
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Re: His anger is really coming between us

I agree with every word posted before me. What you describe is not love, real love does not hurt like this. This man has serious issues you are not trained to deal with.

There are too many great men out there to give one with such serious problems your heart. Protect yourself from the escalation which you have already noticed in the time you have been together. Get out as fast as you can, before it gets any worse.

Be strong and brave and take back your love, save it for someone who deserves and appreciates you. It is not about finding a man who you love...it is about finding a man who loves you. That is the secret.

Best to you,

 
Old 10-07-2012, 08:27 PM   #5
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Re: His anger is really coming between us

So not only does he bully you, but he won't bring you around his friends? So you're the "secret" girlfriend that he has no respect for.

He doesn't love you. And it's time to realize that no matter how much you believe you "love" him (and I can't imagine why with the way he treats you), he isn't going to change.

 
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