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Old 01-21-2013, 09:24 AM   #1
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EmotioFreedo HB User
Insecure or Intuitive?

I am wondering if anyone here has any advice on how to decipher whether your intuition is at work or your insecurities.

I sometimes get a 'gut feeling' that my husband (married a few months together 7yrs we're 28 and 32) may be dishonest with me. I don't want to say I think he's cheating on me...physically. I think he may be flirtacious with other women when I'm not around, or something along those lines. I really don't have any proof. This is where my head and my gut get into with eachother. I know there's no proof but I still feel like it's happening. That points me to the conclusion of insecure. Then, without going into a long story about this, I had his facebook password and he changed it. He says it didn't. Although all that changed was the number secquence from 123 at the end to 321; same word used just numbers changed. So he knew I had the password and when I asked him about it, he said he didn't change it and told me the new password and said it always that one. Even though it clearly was not. He still won't admit to changing it. Which leads me to Intuitive. Clealy he changed it and he's lying about it. Why? What else is he lying about.

Ugh. Any help here? I know it sounds so petty about facebook but it's really the lying that's sending me for the loop. Do I just let this go and move on - even though it's a blatent lie??? How do I?

 
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Old 01-21-2013, 01:27 PM   #2
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metalzombie HB Usermetalzombie HB Usermetalzombie HB Usermetalzombie HB Usermetalzombie HB User
Re: Insecure or Intuitive?

Is it possible you just forgot the password?

Is there a pattern of lying, or only the one facebook incident?

In the past, when I have experienced similar things, though not with facebook, I have initially given the person the benefit of the doubt even if I was absolutely positive that they did lie to me. If I begin to see a pattern of dishonesty, then I have a serious discussion and explain my concerns and then go from there.

Trust is a very important part of any relationship. Unless there are specific things occurring to make you believe that a person is being dishonest in some fashion I don't know that just having a feeling that someone is dishonest is anything more than insecurity.

That is just my thoughts on what you posted. I am not giving you advice because I don't know your full situation. I hope things work out for you, though.

 
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Old 01-21-2013, 03:49 PM   #3
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Re: Insecure or Intuitive?

Thank you for taking the time to respond. There isn't a pattern of lying as far as I know. Maybe some white lies or little nothings along the way in a seven yr stretch.

As far as the password, no chance I forgot it. I had the original given to me in a text from him :S I tend to over analize a lot so something that may seem little to someone else, such as this, can make my head spin.

But, you are correct. A 'feeling' is not enough to go on. Although I'm positive about the password lie it's not a pattern.

 
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Old 01-21-2013, 06:01 PM   #4
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metalzombie HB Usermetalzombie HB Usermetalzombie HB Usermetalzombie HB Usermetalzombie HB User
Re: Insecure or Intuitive?

I understand what you are saying. I can not stand dishonesty. I'd rather hear an unpleasant truth than a lie. I can over-think things, too. The main thing I try to do is take things for what they are.

 
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