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Old 01-13-2006, 11:34 PM   #1
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A review of the chronic question "Do I have schizophrenia?"

Hello all. I came here to ask if I may have schizophrenia. The reason I ask is because I have this thing with constantly being alone and never being able to reasonably sustain an everyday conversation past the first few words of "hello." and "how are you doing?" and that all fun stuff, and my efforts in making chit-chat online at a teenage-based website(They have adults near my age as well, being at 18 going on 19) seemed equally prone to failure. Also I can't reasonably seem to carry an ordinary everyday conversation if my life depended on it, and I've been called "squirrely" or "eccentric" in the past, so I'm thinking schizoprhrenia may be a valid explanation. The only other explanation that could explain any of it may be moderate giftedness but I doubt giftedness in itself could be causing these problems of isolation and my ostensibly inability to carry on a decent conversation as my IQ score, at the highest, has been only 143 with my more reliable scores from more reliable tests have ranged around the 130-139 range which I don't think is high enough to cause the problems I'm experiencing. I mean... I only got a 1400 on the SAT's, and in the top 1 percentile on the ASVAB's AFQT measure, and scored in the 134 IQ range as a child on the OLSAT(otis lennon scholastic ability test) with subsections scores of a verbal score of 125, and a nonverbal score of 141. So I don't believe it's too high to cause any serious problems in itself.

(On a side note: I believe my lower verbal score may be indicative of not having a word/book-enriched environment when I was younger, so my actual overall IQ(Defining it as "Problem solving ability", not just vocabulary knowledge as was one of the major subsections of the OLSAT) is just a little higher than that(Probably a 137 or 138).)

So anyhowz... I don't know if I have schizophrenia or not, or what exactly is going on. I've been thinking it could of been depression, aspergers, or schizoid personality disorder, or schizophrenia but I've effectively crossed out every single one of those due to other features.

It couldn't be depression because even depressed people can carry on a decent conversation. It couldn't be asperger's as I think I respond pretty well and am able to lie to gain an advantage and woman do respond quite well to me(which is not something that would happen at ALL for an Aspergers patient since aspergers patients have troubles with social cues therefore being completely socially awkward). It couldn't be schizoid personaly as I think I am able to express a wide variety of facial expressions which is something that a schizoid cannot do due to flat affectivity. And at this point, I doubt I do have COMPLETE schizophrenia at this point(it may develop later on as I'm only 18) since I'm not hallucinating or hearing voices or false sounds - But even though I don't have those key-features at this point in time, I believe my speech may be tangential, off-the-wall, and not completely coherent which may be a serious indicator of prodromal schizophrenia(the period right before the onset of full-blown schizophrenia).

So anyways... I'll leave you with this post to see if anyone can determine anything. Here's an email message I was about to send to my friend that I haven't spoken to in a LOOOOOONG time so that you can get a gist of how I talk/write in a casual setting so that you someone might pick up on speech abnomalies. Thank you.


MY LETTER TO A FRIEND

" Hey, sloth-like lethargic technologically adept-user with a penchant for anime and sci-fi genres.. JASON! How are you doing MON?(the midletter with a lower-case pronunciation was my intended affect

Here everything is so blase and academia is passing by kind of quickly, and it's been sort of just like existing in an ennui while passively contemplating existential issues, ideas, and philosophies while sporadically going into spurts of howework related activity which usually is about just finishing some assignment that for the most part seems somewhat redundant(It's clear the teachers believe it's for the good of mastering a certain skill, but I don't know.... It all seems too easy and most of the concepts can be grasped almost immediately. :/).

Hey the reason why I'm emailing you is because it's been such a longtime since I've emailed you. Tell me what's been going on and possibly what books you've recently decided to endeavour reading. Here, the most substantial reading pleasures have been the ever-expansive and equally ever-trivial site of everything2. Have you heard of it?

On a side note(like I never have enough of those): I was crawling around the web and I came across the dictionary meant for understanding everyday colloquilisms. Upon the tangent of thinking of Googling someone's name for "information seeking purposes" *cough*stalking*cough*... I wondered what treasures this dictionary could of held for the same purpose(searching someone's name). It turns out this certain online dictionary has your first name(but not mine) as one of the definitions. Check out it out at urbandictionary.com for the definiton. I think you might be somewhat shocked/surprised or ,more likely, expecting a definition such as that provided for your name. I'm surprised your name has so many popular uses that is used by the urban masses.

Anyways.. reply back soon


UPDATE: 15 people have viewed this but yet no one's responded, while there are at least 3 threads above this that have been replied since I've posted this to Meaning: People are actively ignoring this. Maybe I do have schizophrenia? Schizophrenics usually are ignored because they're "crazy" or incoherent.

Last edited by curiouskittie; 01-14-2006 at 10:46 AM.

 
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Old 01-14-2006, 10:59 AM   #2
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Re: A review of the chronic question "Do I have schizophrenia?"

Have yo visited any websites that have the diagnostic criteria for Schizophrenia? You haven't mentioned any symptoms that are those of Schizophrenia, so maybe it is something else. But only a psychiatrist is qualified to diagnose this.

Just to say, your statement that you must be schizophenic because schizophrenics are ignored is untrue. If this were the case, then every post in this forum by a scizophrenic person would have no replies and they do. Maybe people reading you post didn't have anything they felt they could say in reply to you. Don't take it as a personal insult when people don't reply. Try to think, people are here becausre they are suffering and probably looking for answers too, just like you and don't have any answers themselves.

 
Old 01-14-2006, 02:06 PM   #3
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Re: A review of the chronic question "Do I have schizophrenia?"

Curiouskittie, I think you are way off point here. You stated absolutely no symptoms of Schizophrenia. The email you have written doesn't sound to me like a thought disorder. I see no evidence of one at all. The reason you have trouble with conversations sounds like more of social issues and maybe even anxiety. I don't understand how you came to the conclusion of Schizophrenia. Maybe you just pulled a disorder out of a hat to try to explain why people think you're "eccentric". But do you know what? Maybe that's just it. Maybe you are just eccentric. A lot of people don't like to socialize, and others have trouble dealing with social situations, period. I'd also like to state that I agree with cloudedmind on your statement that "you must be schizophenic because schizophrenics are ignored". I don't see how this is based on logic or truth. If you really would like to know what is going on, or what is actually happening out of your point of view, go see a licensed Psychiatrist.

 
Old 01-14-2006, 04:32 PM   #4
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Re: A review of the chronic question "Do I have schizophrenia?"

Thank y'all for your observations. Anyhow - I never said that I MUST BE A SCHIZOPHRENIC because I'm ignored. I simply implied it - and that implication along with all this other symptoms and evidences of schizophrenia makes it justified in my mind. And the evidence is a "thought disorder" which I thought might of been obvious in my post. Meh... maybe I'm wrong and I just have a skewed perception.


Oh wait - Here's a symptom:
Being irritable and argumentative. That's what people usually do during the onset of schizophrenia and what does it look like I'm doing now? Hmmmm.....

Last edited by curiouskittie; 01-14-2006 at 07:47 PM.

 
Old 01-14-2006, 10:45 PM   #5
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Re: A review of the chronic question "Do I have schizophrenia?"

You are being extremely irrational. Irritable and argumentative? Can you say PMS?!? Again, you stated NO SIGNS OR SYMPTOMS OF SCHIZOPHRENIA. And here I thought I was clear. In case you missed my first point, I wrote it in large caps in the previous sentence.

"Maybe I do have schizophrenia? Schizophrenics usually are ignored because they're "crazy" or incoherent." Aren't YOU the one who wrote that? Yes, you did "imply" that. And we understood what you meant clearly. Which is why we stated that you were being an idiot. I'm sorry, I meant that you were being untruthful.

"...along with all this other symptoms and evidences..." Other symptoms and evidences? Why don't you point those out for us kittie. And while you're at it, you can tell me where you saw a thought disorder. All I saw was you using larger words that your vocabulary could comprehend, telling us every damn IQ score you ever recieved, and you going on about people "thinking youĎre eccentric".

Let me be your diagnostician for a second kittie. My final diagnosis would have to be Narcissistic Personality Disorder, Hyperchondrical Disorder and a severe case of Idiocy.

Last edited by SuchGreatHeight; 01-14-2006 at 10:52 PM.

 
Old 01-15-2006, 10:58 AM   #6
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Re: A review of the chronic question "Do I have schizophrenia?"

First off - I'm a guy. There's no such thing as PMSing in this gender. Perhaps a male-version of it, maybe.

Ah... This is where my social "idiocy" or how you define "idiocy" becomes all too apparent. You state that I haven't stated any symptoms of schizophrenia, however if you look closely in my first post...

"my speech may be tangential, off-the-wall, and not completely coherent"

Which indeed is a sign of schizophrenia. If you do not know what that is, let me spell it out. I say something and then you reply. Usually in a normal case, a person replies with something that is at least somewhat of a logical continuation of what the second person said. Instead, with tangential thinking(which is a sign of schizophrenia), the person goes off on a tangent that is completely irrelevant to the point at hand or does not address the point at all. As you may see - I did not address the point that you had brought up("that I had not presented any symptoms of schizohprenia") even though originally I intended to with my second post.

Also consider the fact that I have a hard time carrying on a conversation past the second volley; I'm not saying that a sign OF schizophrenia, but if I did, then it would surely explain that.

Also consider the fact that despite my high IQ score of 130, I have clearly not shown the "intelligence" of someone of such a high score, but in your mind, rather idiocy which kind of agrees with other observations in real life. To other people that have no idea of my score, they do think of me as an idiot. They don't come out and overtly say it, but in the interactions with others and hearing myself speaking out in class, It is all so obvious. And a normal person with a IQ as high as mine wouldn't have these problems(which I believe stem off incoherent thinking[SEE: ABOVE]), so therefore their is something else at play. This was the intent of posting my IQ scores - I wasn't purposely trying to be a stuck-up intellectual prude(pseudointellectual) or just to seem "smart" which it appears you took it as suggested by your statement - "All I saw was you using larger words that your vocabulary could comprehend, telling us every damn IQ score you ever recieved"

Also, back in highschool, I was considered "really weird", and people would whisper that rather loudly while I was speaking to the teacher, and others around the campus said "you're crazy"(and that I talk never talked in a direct way with people, instead I beat around the bush....i.e. tangential) and "you're really weird" while at the same time being universally ignored by everyone. Now if that's not a blaring obvious sign of SOMETHING at play, than I don't know what it is. Having identified the key features that make people think that[see: tangential thinking, incoherency, and SLOWNESS], it aligns itself most closely with a schizo-range disorder - And knowing that the age of onset is usually 15-25, with a large cluster forming it at 18+, makes me think... hmmm... If all my observations are correct, then I may be soon going onto the onset.

Also considering at the time when I took the IQ test as a child, the proctor had suggested two things to my mother - "At these high IQ scores, the child would either grow to be bum or a stellar performer[in whatever field the child pursued]", and considering with my current ensemble(being unkempt) and my current self-beliefs, it seems I'm heading down the former road. And many bums are actually schizophrenic(well, that's definitely the "bum" stereotype in our society)

Also - I'm highly interested in religion and philosophical issues - It's said that many schizophrenics before the onset are interested in the same things(in fact it becomes an "obsessive focus"), so maybe.. just maybe... it is a sign. I'm not saying IT IS one, but the possibility is there, and in conjunction with all these other features, the possibility of it being a sign of schizophrenia jumps rather highly.

And also see now - Lo and behold - there is the symptom of schizophrenia that you had missed, and indeed working off that assumption that their were no stated symptoms, you have mislabeled me and instead produced a rather insulting posts. But even with that, I thank you, for it is an unbiased view from an independant observer - which surely is better than anything coming from this undoubtedly distorted perception.

^^^^hehe... more tangential thinking, indeed.

Last edited by curiouskittie; 01-15-2006 at 11:41 AM.

 
Old 01-15-2006, 12:01 PM   #7
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Re: A review of the chronic question "Do I have schizophrenia?"

Rather than argue with people you don't know about whether you're schizophrenic or not, why don't you make an appointment with a psychiatrist who CAN diagnose you.

It's doing no one, including yourself, any good throwing insults around.

You have listed one symptom of schizophrenia, but to be diagnosed as such you need to have alot more than that. This symptom could be of many different illnesses.

I know people with similar problems with coherent speach and its all down to lack of confedence and/or anxiety and not a MI.

Seek professional medical advice.

 
Old 01-15-2006, 12:25 PM   #8
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Re: A review of the chronic question "Do I have schizophrenia?"

BTW, your profile states that you are female. Maybe you need to go change that?

 
Old 01-15-2006, 01:07 PM   #9
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Re: A review of the chronic question "Do I have schizophrenia?"

Quote:
Originally Posted by cloudedmind
BTW, your profile states that you are female. Maybe you need to go change that?
It's pretty much set in stone, so it can't be changed. Anyhow - Nobody looks at the profile anyways since it's pretty much very uninformative. I mean, the most it tells you is the person's gender and an age - How important is it to know that?

Last edited by curiouskittie; 01-18-2006 at 01:04 AM.

 
Old 01-18-2006, 01:07 AM   #10
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Re: A review of the chronic question "Do I have schizophrenia?"

Quote:
Originally Posted by cloudedmind
Rather than argue with people you don't know about whether you're schizophrenic or not, why don't you make an appointment with a psychiatrist who CAN diagnose you.

It's doing no one, including yourself, any good throwing insults around.

You have listed one symptom of schizophrenia, but to be diagnosed as such you need to have alot more than that. This symptom could be of many different illnesses.

I know people with similar problems with coherent speach and its all down to lack of confedence and/or anxiety and not a MI.

Seek professional medical advice.
Meh - that's a good idea but the only qualified practicioner is one that I would have to pay, and that's kind out of the realm of my options being a proverbial broke college student.

And I don't quite see where I insulted anyone.

 
Old 01-18-2006, 09:45 AM   #11
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Re: A review of the chronic question "Do I have schizophrenia?"

Quote:
Originally Posted by curiouskittie
It's pretty much set in stone, so it can't be changed. Anyhow - Nobody looks at the profile anyways since it's pretty much very uninformative. I mean, the most it tells you is the person's gender and an age - How important is it to know that?

People are going to see it and think you're female and then you make snardy comments about not being female.

 
Old 01-18-2006, 09:51 AM   #12
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Re: A review of the chronic question "Do I have schizophrenia?"

Quote:
Originally Posted by curiouskittie
Meh - that's a good idea but the only qualified practicioner is one that I would have to pay, and that's kind out of the realm of my options being a proverbial broke college student.

And I don't quite see where I insulted anyone.

Well, if you want to get a diagnosis and get meds and start to get better, then seeing a qualified doctor is the only way its going to happen. Posting on forums for advice is one thing, but getting a diagnosis is completely different.

I believe there are free clinics or clinics where you can pay a minimum amount. There is probably facilities within your college/university that can offer advice or even do a google search for such a clinic or look in the telephone directory.

As for insulting people. Maybe you should look over your replies. Someone replied to you and offered advice and you were quite rude.

Please consider that you yourself maybe experiencing difficulties regarding your mental health, but so are other people on this forum, otherwise they wouldn't be using it.

Personally, I'm having a awful time at the moment. Psych meds making me ill and having break through symptoms.

 
Old 01-20-2006, 03:34 PM   #13
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Re: A review of the chronic question "Do I have schizophrenia?"

Thank you cloudedmind for your post. I do realize that others on the board are desperately seeking help as well - but ... The attention can be shared between users - it doesn't have to be monopolized by one user or another(which is seems like you expect I expected).

Anyhow - Please tell me about your own symptoms and possibly anything that happened to when you were younger before the onset of any symptoms you experienced and maybe what exact disorder you may have. If it's schizophrenia, what kind? Thanks!

Also, are you gifted? I'm thinking that giftedness may have some correlation with mental illness, and you seem to be a very proficient speaker of english and intelligent(emotionally[profound sensitivity] and logically wise), and you post prolificly so I suspect you may be gifted yourself.

Last edited by curiouskittie; 01-20-2006 at 03:36 PM.

 
Old 01-21-2006, 04:54 PM   #14
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Re: A review of the chronic question "Do I have schizophrenia?"

Hi, curious kittie. I haven't talked to you for awhile. I just wanted to comment on the whole "giftedness/mental illness" thing. I personally believe that there's a strong connection between high intelligence and mental illnesses. After all, it has been proven that certain disorders like Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder almost always occurs in people with above-average intelligence. It makes sense if you think about it because, in giftedness, brain circuitry is different than a "normal" person, and the same is true for the psychiatric disorders. I'm a firm believer that all of us with neuropsychiatric disorders are extremely gifted persons, and that our differences and eccentricities can be utilized to help us succeed in life, that is, if we don't allow the disorder to inhibit our creativity...
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Old 01-21-2006, 09:03 PM   #15
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Re: A review of the chronic question "Do I have schizophrenia?"

"Giftedness" correlating with mental illness sounds nice, doesn't it? But that's not the case. Mental Illness can affect any persons of any intelligence.

The profile is not in stone. Go to the User CP (at the top) and on the left, "edit profile" is one of choices. Click and be amazed.

The only reason I implied your "idiocy diagnosis" is because of two main variables. One, I was upset by your rude comments. And two, your low understanding of Schizophrenic symptoms and mental health. I, in no way, implied that you were socially idiotic or otherwise.

I'd also like to state that because other people tell you that you are weird, isn't substantial evidence that you have Schizophrenia, or a mental illness period. In grade school and above, if you wear the wrong pair of shoes they think you're weird.

"Considering with my current ensemble (being unkempt) and my current self-beliefs, it seems I'm heading down the former road." plus "Many bums are actually schizophrenic" equals toÖ"I have Schizophrenia"! Do you actually believe yourself when you write this? The only reason your tester said that you'll either be a "bum" or a "stellar performer" is with the way you apply yourself and what you do with your intelligence. High intelligence doesnít mean mental disorder. And bum doesnít mean schizophrenia.

You repeatedly said, "this MAYBE could be a symptom of Schizophrenia". Did you ever think, "this MAYBE could be eccentricities"? "Philosophy and religion MAYBE could just be a hobby"? "Disorganized speech and verbal problems MAYBE could be the result of trying to think too much while I speak" (which I do the same. Too many thoughts and nerves at once.)?

The point I am trying to make is not that you are the text book prodigy of "normal", but that from your description and arguments that you donít have strong evidences of Schizophrenia. Thatís all I am trying to say. You claim to have no visual/auditory/etc hallucinations. No delusions. No positive symptoms and very few negative symptoms. Those are the main factors of Schizophrenia. You have no main factors of Schizophrenia. Which means you have no diagnosis of schizophrenia.

I don't understand why you are so bent over having this disease. With every statement I make saying that you have no signs or symptoms, you pull out a small spot and milk it for all it is worth. Defending your thesis, even with little or no evidence.

I wouldn't be surprised if you found some doctor out there who would put on a label of "Premorbid Schizophrenia" because "there's the smallest chance that you could one day go into full blown psychosis". But if that is the case, I can name thirty other people I know who can fit into the same diagnosis. There is no way to see if you "someday" could have Schizophrenia.

Do you really want help or do you want to convince yourself and others that you are Schizophrenic? If you want help and advice, Iíll be more than willingly to tell you everything I believe and know. But otherwise, Iím not going to play your games because it's a lost cause. Iím not going to fight you for a final diagnosis because neither you or I can do that. I'd have to pull out cloudedmindís post and agree. If you want a diagnosis then see a licensed professional. There are ways to get one with the smallest financial ability, and are plenty of qualified professionals either in or around your area.

I, and yes, you, were both throwing forth insults. You here are no victim when I retaliated with my insults. And I hold no claim of being victimized either. I am assuming that you came here for help and advice, and that is what you received. It is not mine nor anyone elseís fault if you happen to disagree. And Iím sure you can understand that.

Concluding, if you want help, ask for it. We can only answer with our best abilities and truth. You asked, we stated. If you disagree, see a Psychological Diagnostition.

 
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