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Old 02-02-2006, 01:37 PM   #1
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borderline schizophrenia?

Anyone here dx'd w/borderline shizophrenia?

MMP test showed bi-polar and borderline shizophrenia.

T today said that I don't have bi-polar. She said that if she had never met me and was just looking at MMP results she'd see bp. But since I've been seeing her since last yr....she says that I don't have bp.

T said it showed borderline schizo....that she can see how my past and present situations can lead me to not trust people, be paranoid about people.
She said that I don't have schizophrenia.

T doesn't like to "label" people.....she just likes to treat the problems. I'm the one who asked to see test results again and wanted her to explain them to me.

I'm kinda confused here....when she was showing me the graphed results and said this part here means borderline schizo.....I thought that meant I don't have schizophrenia.....Now i'm looking on the internet and BSchizo is a real dx???

Ok , I'm just confused here.

I am dx'd with: depression, anxiety, panic attacks, dissociation, fibromyalgia, tmj, endometriosis, and GERD.

I'm just trying to find where I belong. She said that I definetly do not have borderline personality disorder .
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Old 02-03-2006, 03:30 AM   #2
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Re: borderline schizophrenia?

ok, I've been reading more about borderline shizophrenia.

I guess I'll just come right out and ask her at my next appt in 2 wks if that's what I have.

The test also was on the verge of conversion disorder.....she said that luckily I didn't cross over to it....I've spent 10 yrs trying to figure out why i developed lots of physical symptoms in 95.....went from thinking I had to have ms, lupus, parkinsons, brain tumor,,and on and on to the next illness.
I believed the dr's once they told me for sure I didn't have 'so and so illness'...it was just that inbetween visits I was 100% convinced I had 'so and so illness' until dr said "no you don't".

Anyways, is anyone here dx'd with borderline schizophrenia. Or dx'd with it at first and then dx'd with schizophrenia?

My abnormal thinking and behaving through the yrs have been:

Thinking husband was cheating on me with a girl named joy. At x-mas time I hated seeing the word JOY....put me in instant panic attack.

When H would come home a little later than usual I'd be thinking in my head that he's cheating on me.

In the winter time when the leaves fall off the trees in front of the house, I will only open the living room blinds a tiny bit because their are no leaves on the trees to block the windows. I do this because FIL gives me panic attacks because of something that happened to me when little (nothing that FIL has done/did to me). FIL and MIL live right across the street from H and me.

I always think people are talking negative about me behind my back. This started in elementary school.

The only time I've heard a voice
was when I was little and I was up in my room listening to a Howdy Doody record. The record was playing and I was going to go downstairs to the bathroom and the music stopped and a man's voice asked me "Where are you going?"

I booked it down those steps so fast and wouldn't sleep in my room that night. And now I panic if I see anything "Howdy Doody". A relative gave the kids a Howdy Doody tree ornament and I wont even touch it to put it up!!

Another strange thing that I was thinking is this:
I went to the cleveland clinic to be checked for parkinsons. Dr there said no pd. He did give me the MMP test to take though.
When H and I left his office I told my H, "I bet you anything my mom called the dr to tell him I'm crazy".
In my mind back then I was thinking "I know I have parkinsons and now my mom butted in and I'll never get diagnosed"

Ok, enough for now.

Any ideas from anyone?

I'll be 35 on the 17th....hopefully soon I'll know where I belong because I've felt lost for a long, long time.

Forgot to add that my grandpa had schizophrenia and had been in a mental hospital long time ago, my uncle had schizophrenia and passed away in a mental hospital in Pa. , my aunt has a serious problem but has not been dx'd that I know of, other uncle has severe mental problems, my mom also has depression and something else going on (she's never said what though-but she always reads me her cards when I go over there to see my future).

All of these relatives are on my mom's side.
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Old 02-03-2006, 10:53 PM   #3
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Re: borderline schizophrenia?

luv2read,

The thing about "Borderline Schizophrenia" is that it means you show signs of Schizophrenia, but just dont have enough (or the severity) for a full diagnosis of Schizophrenia.

The specific diagnosis can mean several things. For one, it could mean you are in the begining stages of the disorder of Schizophrenia. That it may be possible that your symptoms increase in amount or severity. Although this can be a scary thought, it is not always the case. It could be more than possible that you just shadow a few traits which quirk your personality. That can mean with little (or no) meds and therapy can keep control (or possibly eliminate) signs and symptoms as you age.

With your diagnosis, it can seem like hell. Mainly because you don't know where it can go. But that is just it! Since no professional, Schizophrenic or even yourself know your outcome, it can be best to just not worry about it. I know that sounds next to impossible, but increaseing stress and anxiety over the matter can just make your symptoms seem worse.

If you show psychotic symptoms or thought processing problems, it is best for medications (such as Anti-Psychotics) to decrease such. And if you have negetive symptoms of Schizophrenia, medications (such as Anti-Depressanst and SSRI's) can also do good. Even without full blown Schizophrenia, you should still treat the symptoms. Because all in all, that is most important. And depending on which symptoms you posess and your severity, depends on what and how much medication you need. As well, therapy is always a help no matter what your diagnosis is.

But in a nutshell, treat the symptoms. No one can guess the outcome of your symptoms, and with that, the diagnosis isn't as important.

SGH

 
Old 02-03-2006, 11:38 PM   #4
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Wink Re: borderline schizophrenia?

Thank you for the input.

Yes stress is my worst enemy. I've been taking effexor xr 150 mg since last yr and I love it. I've been in therapy since last yr and I'm progressing for the better. My T is great and is very proud and amazed at how good I'm doing.

I do believe though that , for me anyways, that just taking the effexor was not enough. The things running through my mind were not taken away by effexor...my T is helping me through this problem. I also have a prescription for 0.5 mg xanax. I take 1/2 of that when needed up to 3 x a day.

My GP had a smile on his face this year when I finally asked him for something I could take to relieve my anxiety/panic attacks.

The poor guy tried for years to get me to take something. I always thought 'no , I don't need anything..it's the ms, or pd, or lupus that's the problem'.

Thanks for the reply, I appreciate it!!
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Old 02-03-2006, 11:55 PM   #5
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Re: borderline schizophrenia?

No problem , I hope I have helped.

For a lot of people, just one medication doesn't cut it. You're talking to one of them . It is very benneficial to try more than one when you show severe or a number of symptoms.

With what you described, I am not surprised that Effexor wasn't enough. With "Schizophrenic Tendencies", it has mostly to do with thought processing. With that spoken, Effexor mostly treats Anxiety and Depression, which isn't strong enough for thought processing. A lot of the times Anti-Psychotics help with such (no matter if it's a small or large dosage). ("Anti Psychotics ( )" sound like a frightening word, but it works for a lot more than psychotic features.)

I actually have been on both Effexor and Xanax. I really liked Effexor when it came to Depression and Anxiety, but I had to resort to larger dosages of Xanax which seemed to create more problems than it eliminated. But I am really glad to see you are on things that help you out.

SGH

 
Old 02-04-2006, 12:15 AM   #6
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Re: borderline schizophrenia?

My GP nor my T have ever suggested an anti-psychotic at this point.

My T is wonderful. If I would of had a T that just came right out in the beginning of meeting him/her..and saw my MMP results and told me I had bi-polar, borderline schizophrenia, severe depression....I would of freaked out and would really be messed up in the thinking process dept.

Last year when my T got my results back she only mentioned the severe depression, anxiety , panic issues.

It was only this year after talking with me for this long that she was comfortable enough to show me more of what the test showed....and I thank her for that!!!!

Hope you're doing well and thank you!!!
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Old 02-04-2006, 02:56 AM   #7
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Re: borderline schizophrenia?

If your Therapist or Psychiatrsit don't see a need for Anti-Pyschotics, then that is fantastic. I was just suggesting an alternative to (in case of) severe symptoms.

That is great that you enjoy your Therapist. That trust and understanding can help a great deal.

I know what you mean about what kind of reaction you'd have if someone straight out told you something like that. My own Therapist brought me up to the idea of what I might have and how I would take it, even before the testing. So I had a pretty good idea of what was coming when I was hit with quite a few disorder labels.

I hope everything goes well for you, and I send my best wishes .

SGH

 
Old 02-04-2006, 03:13 PM   #8
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Re: borderline schizophrenia?

Quote:
Originally Posted by luv2read
Thank you for the input.

Yes stress is my worst enemy. I've been taking effexor xr 150 mg since last yr and I love it. I've been in therapy since last yr and I'm progressing for the better. My T is great and is very proud and amazed at how good I'm doing.

I do believe though that , for me anyways, that just taking the effexor was not enough. The things running through my mind were not taken away by effexor...my T is helping me through this problem. I also have a prescription for 0.5 mg xanax. I take 1/2 of that when needed up to 3 x a day.

My GP had a smile on his face this year when I finally asked him for something I could take to relieve my anxiety/panic attacks.

The poor guy tried for years to get me to take something. I always thought 'no , I don't need anything..it's the ms, or pd, or lupus that's the problem'.

Thanks for the reply, I appreciate it!!

theres the source of your dissociation and paranoia sweety.
effexor i found ....made those problems WAYYYYY worse. ion meself and everyone who i know that takes it.

 
Old 02-04-2006, 03:50 PM   #9
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Re: borderline schizophrenia?

Thanks SGH!!

HI Mortician, No, I had the dissociation since I was little (just didn't know what it was).

My worst dissociation I wasn't on anything. It was after our second son was born and all heck broke loose between H's family , my family, and H and me.
I don't remember feeding baby, changing his diaper, cleaning unbilical cord, dressing him, taking him to dr's appts, bathing him,,,, nothing!
This was in 1995.

Effexor xr has saved my life as far as I'm concerned. I will be on it forever and am happy to admit that.

Abnormal thoughts I've had since little also.

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Old 02-23-2006, 02:00 PM   #10
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Re: borderline schizophrenia?

ok, since i last saw T she explained why the mmp test showed borderline.

She said that the test showed that I have a tendency to isolate myself.

Oh yeah, I do that much of the time. Dealing with fibromyalgia, tmj, depression, anxiety, panic attacks, hate loud noises in the house.....I tend to hybernate to the bedroom and isolate myself.

I see myself isolating myself from making new friends also because of dealing w/ all these problems. Most people wont put up with a 'friend' who is fatigued 24/7 and in pain. I'm too tired to keep up friendships!!

Anyways, that's what she said...no schizophrenia or bipolar was written anywhere on the written report of the mmp test.

Now, just to convince H of this....
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Old 02-24-2006, 12:20 AM   #11
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Re: borderline schizophrenia?

I think if people show no signs or symptoms of hallucinations or severe delusions, then borderline Schizophrenia shouldn't even be mentioned. It just seems to scare people.

Alot of other disorders can cause Schizophrenia-like symptoms. Things like paranoia, flat affect, dissociation, all can all be symptoms of depresion, a sudden mood change or in result of physical illness or trauma (stress).

Tests are hard to use considering the time span of what you have, the specific details, and other holes. It's hard to question something like Schizophrenia when so many things can mimic.

That's great that you're not Bipolar or Schizophrenic. It's good to hear you got things straightened out.

Good luck with the H and future situations.

SGH

 
Old 02-24-2006, 01:33 AM   #12
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Re: borderline schizophrenia?

Hi SGH,

I also think that the MMP test is kinda silly. I mean you have to give such 'black or white' answers.

When taking it, I felt like I wanted to explain some of my answers but you can't.

It did kinda scare me to hear borderline schizophrenia because there's lots of mental illness on my mom's side, and schizophrenia would be one of them.

Thanks for all the help SGH, I appreciate your taking the time!!
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