Hi.. Well I honestly think what you are doing is a very genuinely sweet thing. But at the cost of you and you're husband's happienss? I really think you should talk to her.
Some things if not all seem like she is being very disrespectful. I wouldn't be able to understand either. I mean she should be greatful that you guys took her in and not try to cause problems.
I'm not sure because everyone is different and alot of schizophrenics cannot take care of themselfs..even on meds. I think your friend should have more compassion and consideration for you two. You should tell her and ask her why she cannot take care of herself.? Ask her or really just tell her that you cannot take care of her when you already have alot of other repsonsablities. Not that it matters but may I ask the age of your friend? I would find out what has changed from the first month of her living with you till now.? Keep open communication with her and tell her to let you know how she feels about her actions.? I would make sure she knows you are not judging her or anything but just wanting to understand why she does the things she does.
I hope I was able to give you some good insight.
FYI, I was diagnoised with schizophrenia when I was 19. It's been an up and down battle but I am now striving to be the best I can be. I live with my parents and boyfriend. Because I feel right now I still cannot make it on my own. I am 22. Someday I know though it I keep at it and stay strong I can someday provide for myself.
I hope someday your friend can feel the same.
May you be guided to do the right things and say the right things.. because it seems you really want this to work out. I know all you are trying to do is help her. But you shouldn't take on the role of being a figure like her mom. Because your not, you're her friend. Just remember that. I think Ive said enough. Good luck with figuring out what to do.