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Old 06-23-2010, 06:57 PM   #1
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bipolarorworse HB User
could i be schizofrenic?

i have been seeing shadows of people staring at me and see shadows out of the corner of my eyes. i started hearing people talking and i eve hear myself talking over and over in my head. i repeat words and things over and over in my head. i want to be left alone and not bugged by anyone even my children. for about two years i left my family and lived on the streets and my family never knew where i was. i do that sometimes.

i get so fustrated with my loved ones. i chased them with knifes, beat them up and other mean things. i tried to kill my self many times i even ran my car off the road.i have a hard time trying to work and i tried to go back to school but i was suspended for bad grades and i am 26 years old. when i would do my homework it would take me hours to try and understand it.

i have no feelings. i laugh at diasters and i am mean to people that don't even know me i have no friends and i dont care to have any either. i take care of myself now but iam stil sloppy about it. when i was young i had two imagany freinds when i was little. i lose sense with reality when i think about stuff too much and when i come too i am chewing on my tongue.

i have bad memory where i can't remember some of yesterday. they diagnosed me with bipolar 1 but i think i may be something else because when i start to feel better i stop taking my pills and causes me to relapse and do something psychotic and now i am commited to see my doctor 4 times a year. please help and respond

Last edited by bipolarorworse; 06-23-2010 at 06:58 PM.

 
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Old 06-23-2010, 09:08 PM   #2
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PeggyLuXXX HB User
Re: could i be schizofrenic?

Quote:
Originally Posted by bipolarorworse View Post
i have been seeing shadows of people staring at me and see shadows out of the corner of my eyes. i started hearing people talking and i eve hear myself talking over and over in my head. i repeat words and things over and over in my head. i want to be left alone and not bugged by anyone even my children. for about two years i left my family and lived on the streets and my family never knew where i was. i do that sometimes.

i get so fustrated with my loved ones. i chased them with knifes, beat them up and other mean things. i tried to kill my self many times i even ran my car off the road.i have a hard time trying to work and i tried to go back to school but i was suspended for bad grades and i am 26 years old. when i would do my homework it would take me hours to try and understand it.

i have no feelings. i laugh at diasters and i am mean to people that don't even know me i have no friends and i dont care to have any either. i take care of myself now but iam stil sloppy about it. when i was young i had two imagany freinds when i was little. i lose sense with reality when i think about stuff too much and when i come too i am chewing on my tongue.

i have bad memory where i can't remember some of yesterday. they diagnosed me with bipolar 1 but i think i may be something else because when i start to feel better i stop taking my pills and causes me to relapse and do something psychotic and now i am commited to see my doctor 4 times a year. please help and respond
Hello there BipolarOrWorse,

The things that you are describing sound very much like Schizophrenia.

It could be that if you've already been diagnosed with Bipolar Disorder then you may actually have Schizo-Affective Disorder which has consistancies of Bipolar (The Depressive State and the Manic State) AND Schizophrenia (The Hallucinations and the Voices).

I feel that I too have Schizophrenia.

I have been having Hallucinations since the age of 13. I see some strange things. I also have Auditory Hallucinations too (where I hear things).

I see large black hooded cloaked figures mostly. Sometimes they talk in Male and sometimes in Female voices. Sometimes they say nothing.

Ever since I was young I have always thought that I was born and put on this earth to find the purpose of life and that when I did find out, the Government would want to Interview me and take me away.

Even now, I see men sent from the Military following me. I know they are from the Army, etc.. as I see their uniform and see their guns. If I stop and turn around, I see them hiding from me so I won't see them but it is too late. I have already seen them.

I think that when I had a Breast Reduction on the NHS, the Government sent in somebody, like somebody disguised as a Docter/Nurse but was really a spy who implanted something inside of me. I can feel it and one of my scars is bigger than the other which tells me they had to make a bigger inscision into one of my breasts to implant the device deep below the muscle. With this device, they are attempting to read my mind and track where I am going.

I think that when I am out, people are going to hurt me. They are trying to read my thoughts and I know that if I make direct eye contact, if they concentrate, they can read my thoughts and from this they too will know that I am going to discover the meaning/secret of life. I don't want to be taken away from my family. I only have my Mum and my Ex-Boyfriend as a friend. I don't easily make friends as I am suspicious of everyone!

I have Self-Harmed for years and years. It gives me a release that nothing else can. It is like swapping something for something better. The pain that I have for something refreshing. I feel re-born when I harm! I have attempted suicide on a number of times of occasions.

Each time I have heard voices telling me I should die. Then, I hear a pleasant voice reminding me that I have a meaning and telling me not to do anything stupid. I know it sounds silly biut the voice is so powerful and controlling, it is like I *HAVE* to follow what it is saying.

The voices I hear are Demonic and I know they are from Satan. When I was younger, I used to worship Satan then I stopped and he became angry. He demanded I **** my new Lhasa-Apso puppy for him by sending Demons to try and persuade me but I refused it was said that if I didn't light 2 black candles and pray to him then he would **** my Mum and my puppy. I did as he advised and they were spared.


A few years ago. He sent a Demon and through the Demon he spoke to me directly. He said he wanted me to go to my friends Kingdom Hall for Jehovahs Witnesses to gather information for him. To see if God was conspiring against him. I did as I was advised for him. This pleased him. He gave me a magical power in exchange. The power to control my dreams. I am yet to perfect this power yet. But he can give me anything. He can make me live forever or make me be able to fly. Anything I desire. He also promised me money. The next day, I bought a Scratch Card and won £2, I then bought 2 Lottery tickets and won x2 £20's. This small sum was just showing me his immense power.

Another time, he appeared in the form of a dark figure, like the ones I usually see but this time it was Satan himself. He said I would be his bride. 'The Bride Of The Devil'! All I had to do was go out and recruit 'The Humans' to help rise up in a revolt against God. I shouted like a Bible Basher! In the end, I was taken away by the Police. But not Sectioned.

I also sometimes have extreme 'Highs' and 'Lows' where I go really excited and manic and spend a lot of money.
I have got heavily into debt in doing this. When I am like this, my sex drive goes through the roof and I sometimes sleep with strangers. But yet when I am having a 'Bad' day, I feel like nothing, worthless and empty. I do nothing. I have to be encouraged to get washed and dressed and even eat. I have no need for food. I don't smile or laugh. Just sit there, still for hours and hours, alone in my room.

Can you relate to this?

I don't for one minute mean to act so selfish that I am soley going on about myself.

I am just wanting to share information to try and help you.

If you can relate to me then I'd say your DEF either Schizophrenic or have Schizo-Affective Disorder.

Do you live in the U.K or in another country?

If in the U.K, if you can afford it, it may be worth getting a second opinion from a Private Psychiatrist.

In the U.K, they do say by law you are entitled to a 'Second Opinion' but getting one is more difficult than it sounds.

I tried to go to other 'Mental Health Team Centre' areas but was turned down and "Advised" to stay where I was.

The reason I wanted another opinion was because my Psychiatrist is rubbish and has just diagnosed me with BorderLine Personality Disorder. I KNOW I have more than this and I greatly suspect that you have more than just Bipolar.

Feel free to reply and I hope I have helped!

Lv Linzi.
xXx

 
Old 06-24-2010, 07:34 PM   #3
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Join Date: Jun 2010
Posts: 4
bipolarorworse HB User
Re: could i be schizofrenic?

Quote:
Originally Posted by PeggyLuXXX View Post
Hello there BipolarOrWorse,

The things that you are describing sound very much like Schizophrenia.

It could be that if you've already been diagnosed with Bipolar Disorder then you may actually have Schizo-Affective Disorder which has consistancies of Bipolar (The Depressive State and the Manic State) AND Schizophrenia (The Hallucinations and the Voices).

I feel that I too have Schizophrenia.

I have been having Hallucinations since the age of 13. I see some strange things. I also have Auditory Hallucinations too (where I hear things).

I see large black hooded cloaked figures mostly. Sometimes they talk in Male and sometimes in Female voices. Sometimes they say nothing.

Ever since I was young I have always thought that I was born and put on this earth to find the purpose of life and that when I did find out, the Government would want to Interview me and take me away.

Even now, I see men sent from the Military following me. I know they are from the Army, etc.. as I see their uniform and see their guns. If I stop and turn around, I see them hiding from me so I won't see them but it is too late. I have already seen them.

I think that when I had a Breast Reduction on the NHS, the Government sent in somebody, like somebody disguised as a Docter/Nurse but was really a spy who implanted something inside of me. I can feel it and one of my scars is bigger than the other which tells me they had to make a bigger inscision into one of my breasts to implant the device deep below the muscle. With this device, they are attempting to read my mind and track where I am going.

I think that when I am out, people are going to hurt me. They are trying to read my thoughts and I know that if I make direct eye contact, if they concentrate, they can read my thoughts and from this they too will know that I am going to discover the meaning/secret of life. I don't want to be taken away from my family. I only have my Mum and my Ex-Boyfriend as a friend. I don't easily make friends as I am suspicious of everyone!

I have Self-Harmed for years and years. It gives me a release that nothing else can. It is like swapping something for something better. The pain that I have for something refreshing. I feel re-born when I harm! I have attempted suicide on a number of times of occasions.

Each time I have heard voices telling me I should die. Then, I hear a pleasant voice reminding me that I have a meaning and telling me not to do anything stupid. I know it sounds silly biut the voice is so powerful and controlling, it is like I *HAVE* to follow what it is saying.

The voices I hear are Demonic and I know they are from Satan. When I was younger, I used to worship Satan then I stopped and he became angry. He demanded I **** my new Lhasa-Apso puppy for him by sending Demons to try and persuade me but I refused it was said that if I didn't light 2 black candles and pray to him then he would **** my Mum and my puppy. I did as he advised and they were spared.


A few years ago. He sent a Demon and through the Demon he spoke to me directly. He said he wanted me to go to my friends Kingdom Hall for Jehovahs Witnesses to gather information for him. To see if God was conspiring against him. I did as I was advised for him. This pleased him. He gave me a magical power in exchange. The power to control my dreams. I am yet to perfect this power yet. But he can give me anything. He can make me live forever or make me be able to fly. Anything I desire. He also promised me money. The next day, I bought a Scratch Card and won £2, I then bought 2 Lottery tickets and won x2 £20's. This small sum was just showing me his immense power.

Another time, he appeared in the form of a dark figure, like the ones I usually see but this time it was Satan himself. He said I would be his bride. 'The Bride Of The Devil'! All I had to do was go out and recruit 'The Humans' to help rise up in a revolt against God. I shouted like a Bible Basher! In the end, I was taken away by the Police. But not Sectioned.

I also sometimes have extreme 'Highs' and 'Lows' where I go really excited and manic and spend a lot of money.
I have got heavily into debt in doing this. When I am like this, my sex drive goes through the roof and I sometimes sleep with strangers. But yet when I am having a 'Bad' day, I feel like nothing, worthless and empty. I do nothing. I have to be encouraged to get washed and dressed and even eat. I have no need for food. I don't smile or laugh. Just sit there, still for hours and hours, alone in my room.

Can you relate to this?

I don't for one minute mean to act so selfish that I am soley going on about myself.

I am just wanting to share information to try and help you.

If you can relate to me then I'd say your DEF either Schizophrenic or have Schizo-Affective Disorder.

Do you live in the U.K or in another country?

If in the U.K, if you can afford it, it may be worth getting a second opinion from a Private Psychiatrist.

In the U.K, they do say by law you are entitled to a 'Second Opinion' but getting one is more difficult than it sounds.

I tried to go to other 'Mental Health Team Centre' areas but was turned down and "Advised" to stay where I was.

The reason I wanted another opinion was because my Psychiatrist is rubbish and has just diagnosed me with BorderLine Personality Disorder. I KNOW I have more than this and I greatly suspect that you have more than just Bipolar.

Feel free to reply and I hope I have helped!

Lv Linzi.
xXx
Hi and thanks for responding

I just see ghosts and i hear other people than myself talking to each other and i got put on abilify and seroquel to help with that but they dont i still hear and see stuff but it is not that bad.

i dont like going places some times and i need encouragement to do anything. i have had two imaganary frens when i was little. i also seen ghosts when i was young and they were so real that i thought they were sleeping on the bed with me.

I sometimes dont want to eat but my boyfriend cooks for me. the mostproblem i have right now is the hearing and seeing stuff and i dont have any energy at all and it is hard for people to knowwhat i am talking about because it is like iam chewing on my tongue.

iam from the united states and i have had alot of opinions and they told me i had bipolar but i never told them about hearing and seeing things because i am embrassed but now they bother me too much and i know i need help.

 
Old 06-24-2010, 10:52 PM   #4
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Join Date: Jun 2010
Posts: 1
izabell HB User
Re: could i be schizofrenic?

This is my frist time to post. Well here it goes.
When I was alittle girl I didn't hear voices nor did I see things. I would take a small stick about 8 inches and get some string and tie it on the end of the stick, like a small fishing pole. I woud shake this stick and start talking out loud and creat stories in my mind. It was alway's people. I did this until I was13.
Now that I'am older adult I'am doing this bizarre thing again! I feel totally weird. I find comfort in this. What the heck is going on? I also see shadoes at the corners of my eyes. What's next?

 
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