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Old 06-17-2004, 08:16 PM   #1
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Join Date: May 2004
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ontheway HB User
I have this question to ask

Hey everyone, I have a question to the ones that have overcome hurting themselves

How did you do it ? i mean what did you do to get your sadness out, especially your anger ? or to get your mind off it ?

How can you make it stop the wanting to hurt yourself when you have conflic or trouble inside ur mind, how can you stop the resorting to cutting ? or hurting yourself period ?

I really did bad and I feel very guilty for it and shamed and I would like to move past all my problems but I understand I have to really set my mind to do it or eles i wont archive my long term goal even though my mind is againts me wanting to get better ITS MY LIFE AND I WANT TO BE BETTER and im sick and tried of dealing with crap when life is so short and is not here for me to suffer in its here for me to enjoy so I need to take that up all this is so easy to say but actually doing it is much harder and I do get tired fighting but I know this is what I have been delt with in life but its something I can work thru one day at a time.

I just want to feel "ok " and that would be fine I dont want to feel scared or upset or sad anymore I know those feelings too well and I'd like to get to know the happiness, peace, content,feelings I don;t know them too well, well thanks to anyone who replys to this post God blless everyone of you


 
Old 06-19-2004, 06:03 PM   #2
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CarryOn HB User
Re: I have this question to ask

hey, i know just how u feel. i kept telling myself i would stop and that i could stop whenever i wanted, but i never admitted to myself that it had become an addiction. i'd go for maybe a week without doing it, trying to like prove to myself that i could go without doing it, but then i'd cut like crazy after stopping for a while. have you told anyone about this? i just recently asked someone for help for the first time. it was so hard to tell them but it really helped. one of the main reasons i would continue cutting is because i had so much guilt from cutting in the first place, that i just kept doing it thinking it would make my guilty feeling better (if that makes any sense), so telling someone helped me let go of that guilt. i know it's still going to be hard to try and stop but now at least i have someone to talk to about it. whenever i want to cut i try to get my mind off of it by reading, writing, drawing, etc. but it still doesn't seem to help, talking to someone is probably your best bet. Just think of how good it will feel to be SI free and how badly you want that. if you want it bad enough i know you can do it just set your mind to it and make a firm decision, instead of wavering back and forth. and of course there might be times when you slip up, but ya just gotta pick back up and try your hardest. take care and keep us posted

 
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Old 06-19-2004, 06:40 PM   #3
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Join Date: May 2004
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ontheway HB User
Cool Re: I have this question to ask

Quote:
Originally Posted by CarryOn
hey, i know just how u feel. i kept telling myself i would stop and that i could stop whenever i wanted, but i never admitted to myself that it had become an addiction. i'd go for maybe a week without doing it, trying to like prove to myself that i could go without doing it, but then i'd cut like crazy after stopping for a while. have you told anyone about this? i just recently asked someone for help for the first time. it was so hard to tell them but it really helped. one of the main reasons i would continue cutting is because i had so much guilt from cutting in the first place, that i just kept doing it thinking it would make my guilty feeling better (if that makes any sense), so telling someone helped me let go of that guilt. i know it's still going to be hard to try and stop but now at least i have someone to talk to about it. whenever i want to cut i try to get my mind off of it by reading, writing, drawing, etc. but it still doesn't seem to help, talking to someone is probably your best bet. Just think of how good it will feel to be SI free and how badly you want that. if you want it bad enough i know you can do it just set your mind to it and make a firm decision, instead of wavering back and forth. and of course there might be times when you slip up, but ya just gotta pick back up and try your hardest. take care and keep us posted
Hey , , Thanks so much for responding to me, people know I cut, certain member of my family know and my boyfriend knows they try and help but once i get into that kind of mood its hard because its like thats all I want to do and its hard to bring myself out of that, last time I cut I did really bad to my boyfriend by telling him i was going to kill myself and I took the shavor and cut my wrist it didnt go deep he got it away and sense then I've been feeling extremely bad because I hurt him he was really scared he was shaking and how could I do that to him ? but I did, because I was acting stupid It would be nice to move past my problems I cut because sometimes I get so angry and its hard to calm it when I'm so mad at myself or others but even as i say this I'd like to stop I feel like I dont want too I just want to feel normal again, I'm glad you have someone u can talk to about it and that she is very understand that is awesome my therapist tells me to write my feelings or draw when im upset instead of hurting myself I need to learn to do that more often because I'm sure it can help in some way but I dont want to keep hurting my boyfriend & family I want to feel "sane " although I'm not crazy I feel that way I just hurt so much inside and sometimes it angers me , I know want the real me to show to people and not the hurt side of me so I guess I'll have to work on that because I really need too , thanks again for the advise and replying to me sometimes i post and I don't get that many people respond to my post i appreciate you taking your time to talk with me God bless u always (( hugs )) I hope today is blessed for you and your doing much better take care of u

 
Old 06-20-2004, 04:22 PM   #4
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CarryOn HB User
Re: I have this question to ask

Hey there again well it's good that you have people that are trying to help you. now that my friend knows i feel like whenever i want to cut i'll be hurting her too, so that definitely helps me hold back. today i was sitting in my room with the razor at my wrist, but i just couldn't, i feel like when i do it it'll just crush my friend and that's the last thing i want to do. I really hope you'll be okay, God bless

 
Old 06-21-2004, 07:18 PM   #5
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Posts: 102
sweet21punkie HB User
Re: I have this question to ask

what i found that helped was 2 things, a loving and caring friends and this is most likely going to sound odd, but it works for me, watching Tim Burton Films. his wonderful work makes me feel like i am not alone on my werid ways of thinking. when im watching his movies, i forget all about the stuff going on in my life and SI. so find some person that you love the movies, books, TV, video games, whatever it is, something that cant bring you down. it will help alot. take care of your self.
__________________
~~pUnKiE~~

 
Old 06-22-2004, 08:16 AM   #6
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Join Date: Feb 2003
Posts: 251
Ohiochick HB User
Re: I have this question to ask

In my opinion the hurt never really does go away.
The pain you felt that you injured yourself over is almost always there.
The thing is the way that you cope with your problems and your feelings.
you need an outlet other than your old ways.
You need a new perspective on things. Change something about the way you think one day at a time. Thinking the same way about things gets you stuck in rut, it doesn't help and things don't seem to change when you keep thinking the same way.

If that makes sense to you anyway.
I am in a hurry.
Sorry...

Take Care!
__________________
A person who fears failure, limits theirselves by being afraid to try anything new.

 
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