I have been up for a little over two days. When I get like this and have nothing to do, I tend to cut a lot. One reason being, I think a lot. And when I think a lot, tons of emotions come up that I feel I cannot control. So I turn to the one thing I can control. I think I have cut over 230 times now.
Can anyone relate?
The following user gives a hug of support to nomeatforme63: asteral (09-24-2011)
The key is to do things that make your mind busy, so you don't think so much and give yourself so much ammo to cut with. Read a good book, watch funny movies, eat really spicy or flavorful food.....there are many things to do to keep your mind busy so that the thoughts don't take over.
I've been reading this one book. I've already read it five or six times within the last month. It used to help keep my mind busy. Not so much anymore. And I don't eat. And I don't have.much to watch anymore. But I get paid today so I may buy some stuff that may help keep me busy.
Yes, I can relate. So, many triggers-and it seems like new ones come everyday. I am also one who sometimes cannot sleep for days at a time and get real bad off. And, i am an adult, living with my mom who is not mentally well herself, but she won't admit it. So she is driving me crazy. And she is a big trigger for me! But on the other hand, even though she knows i cut not to die and have been doing it since i was around 7 she calls 911 on me. Then says she knows, after she picks me up from the mental place, wher they tell me she should be, not me!!
way to go, sounds like you've stocked up pretty well. Sudoko was a great idea, that definitely keeps your mind busy. Hopefully these things will help you get through the rough nights and keep you occupied.
yeh i know the feeling i have insomnia and i do pretty much the same thing as you except i dont get the emotions but the cutting seems to help me sleep after a few days like you i also have hundreds of cuts and scars
I can relate because I am a cutter of 30 years (29, I haven't cut this year). Mine was a release of overwhelming anger or sadness. Are you cutting out of bordem? Are you seeing a dr.? I hope you get help for this because I dont want you ending up looking like me. Take care
This is definitely not something you want to continue with if you can find some way to stop. If your cutting out of frustration from not being able to sleep, then the best way to handle it would be to go to the doc or pdoc if you have one and deal with the insomnia issue. Insomnia is not the harmless thing that most folks think it is....it causes major problems, especially when it lasts for days at a time.
Cutting is not the path you want to get on to cope with your problems, once you start it's very hard to stop, I've been doing it for 29 years..too long...and although these days I'm able to go long lengths of time without....it still comes back.