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Old 04-18-2013, 11:07 PM   #1
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I don't really know what to do... help?

2 days ago I relapsed after nearly a month of being clean. I scratched one wound into my knee and one on my wrist, under my watch strap. My mum knows that I have self harmed (due to a rather teary confession in a doctor's office) and she doesn't really understand anything. I was depressed when my grandpa died 3 years ago.

For the past 9-10 months I've had really bad anxiety and depression, especially when I nearly failed Maths last year... everyone tells me I expect too much of myself. This year I started scratching myself and I'm having problems with compulsive skin picking. It's really hard to hide the scratches, as where I live is hot a lot of the time, so I wear shorts and tank tops, and I tend to scratch my fingers, hands and wrists. My mum doesn't acknowledge my anxiety as a problem, she always tells me "Stop this, you're working yourself up into it." which really doesn't help as I'm not working myself up into it, and her casual dismissal hurts me deeply.

I really want to get her to understand better, but at the same time it's kind of hard to tell your own mother that her comments and actions trigger you really badly. I've just started seeing a really nice psychologist, who I think might be able to help me, but I kind of want some advice from people who might be able to understand.

Last edited by Administrator; 04-18-2013 at 11:26 PM.

 
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Old 06-20-2013, 06:35 PM   #2
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Re: I don't really know what to do...help?

There is a really good book called "Bodily Harm" dedicated to the understanding of self injury. I have read it before and had some friends read it to help understand my problem better.

 
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Old 06-21-2013, 09:22 PM   #3
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Re: I don't really know what to do... help?

Hello.

I suggest writing a letter to your mom about your triggers for self-injury and how some of her comments and actions can really make you want to self-injury. I think the big advantage with writing everything down beforehand is you can give yourself plenty of time to figure out how you want to share your feelings without any interruptions or distractions. The other major advantage of expressing yourself through writing I think is once you given her what you wrote, she'll know everything. She can read what you wrote over and over again to fully grasp what it is that triggers you to self injure. You don't have to worry about losing confidence to tell her what's really going on or her asking too many questions at the wrong time.

 
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