peaceseeker2

Hi there! Take a deep breath and try to relax. I really think your difficulty with maintaining an erection is psychologically induced. That first time that you were with this woman, you lost your erection and you were embarrassed. You go on to say that you always think about whether you are going to be able to maintain your erection or not. That's your clue. I think what you are dealing with is performance anxiety. You indicate that you can masturbate with no problems if I understood you correctly.
So, how do you get over this? First of all, maybe just by understanding what is going on with yourself will help you out. It is always easier to battle a demon you know than one you do not. Second, have a back up plan! I'll give you an example. The next time that you are with this woman and things start to heat up....go with it. Enjoy yourselves. {PROVIDING YOU TWO TAKE THE NECESSARY PRECAUTIONS NOT TO GET PREGNANT OR TRANSMIT DISEASES!!!} If you find yourself losing your erection, that is okay. You do not need an erection to be sexual with someone. You can still perform oral sex on this woman, talk dirty to her as she masturbates, you can stimulate her with your hand, and the list goes on and on. If you give this woman multiple orgasms with your tongue, for example, you losing your erection is the LAST thing she will remember about that encounter or you!
Sooo.....relax. Realize that although it does sound like a cliche, it is true that sooner or later every man has to deal with the situation of his best friend downstairs not wanting to cooperate at some point in his life, sooner or later. I am 29 and I have been dealing with all kinds of sexual dysfunction, including having some serious difficulty in maintaining an erection. This is due to me being on antidepressant medication. Knock on wood, I think that on my last visit to my psychiatrist. we have found a medication combination that will allow me not to be depressed and still be able to function sexually. (Not being able to have an orgasm really gets on a man's nerve after a while. It really sucked.)
Anyway, if this woman is worth your time, your energy, your effort, your worry, your concern, your thoughts, your stressing over this, then she will be supportive, understanding, patient, caring, etc. If not, tell her she is not worthy of your penis and that you are not going to waste a perfectly good erection on the likes of her in the future.
So, good luck and definitely come back and post again. I would be interested in hearing how things are turning out for you. Just coming here and venting and getting support will probably do wonders for you as well.
Take care, and seriously, keep everyone posted on how things are going.