It appears you have not yet Signed Up with our community. To Sign Up for free, please click here....



Sexual Health - General Message Board
Post New Thread   Closed Thread
LinkBack Thread Tools
Old 12-27-2003, 12:38 AM   #1
Junior Member
 
Join Date: Oct 2003
Location: Valdosta, Ga, USA
Posts: 43
Sick_Generation HB User
Possible Problem?

I'm currently engaged...

But i find myself wondering about being with other women. I'm 21, and everytime i go to the bar or club, i just want to hook up with someone. Oh, but wait! I;m engaged. :|

Tonight i talked to a girl i kinda know, and she is very hot. She told me if i were single, we would be hookin up right now. She also told me i could be doing better. I guess talking about, getting a better looking girl, like herself.

I love my fiance, but just seems like sometimes, i want to be single and "explore" my options. Is this normal?

 
Old 12-27-2003, 01:19 AM   #2
Senior Veteran
(female)
 
Join Date: Sep 2001
Location: Edmonton, AB, Canada
Posts: 2,465
wrin HB User
Re: Possible Problem?

Cold feet is normal, yes.

Now you need to ask yourself if there's a good reason why you're feeling like this -- do you feel like you could do tons better than your fiancee? Do you love her? Could you spend the rest of your life with her?

 
Sponsors Lightbulb
   
Old 12-27-2003, 04:31 AM   #3
Newbie
 
Join Date: Dec 2003
Location: on earth,,, for now
Posts: 9
Eclipse1 HB User
Unhappy Re: Possible Problem?

Well it is normal in a since, but not totally. You don't ask a woman to marry you just so you can hook up at the bar. Maybe you need to stay away from the bar seen. I do because like you said women will approach you, say things to make you think and the next thing you know you have done a big no no. Me I don't go because I hate to even deal with that stuff, and I love my wife dearly so why even go. Next thing you need to take a look at is you, are you sure this is the woman you want to be with, if you are not 100% sure then you need too either slow down, or just put a hold on the whole thing all together. When I ask that I don't mean do you want to be with her, I mean with out a doubt can you, and do you want to be with her and her only. If there is one single doubt in your mine you need to take another look at your relationship with this lady before you do something wrong, most of all before you rip this girls heart out. There is nothing I would ever do in a million life times to disrespect my wife or to hurt her. I have to be away from her for a year and the sexual part of it does not bother me, being away from her does. When you have that, then you know it is time. I hope this helps if even a little bit buddy. Take care and good luck.
__________________
She is my entire world and life long love!

 
Old 12-27-2003, 11:41 PM   #4
Junior Member
 
Join Date: Oct 2003
Location: Valdosta, Ga, USA
Posts: 43
Sick_Generation HB User
Re: Possible Problem?

Yes i think i can spend the rest of my life with her.

But....

I sometimes don't think i'm ready for that kind of commitment. I'm Young and feel like i sould enjoy my youth to the fullest!

 
Old 12-28-2003, 01:54 PM   #5
Senior Veteran
(male)
 
Join Date: May 2003
Location: Florida
Posts: 3,190
Magnetic HB UserMagnetic HB User
Re: Possible Problem?

If you are thinking of other women in that way, then I am not sure you are really in love. If you feel this way now, when you are still free, how will you feel in a few years when she is pregnant and you are stuck?

I would advise that you call things off. Better to hurt her now and let her find someone who really loves her, and for you to sow some wild oats, than for her to have to divorce you after having your child and finding out you are cheating on her.

 
Old 12-28-2003, 02:03 PM   #6
Junior Member
 
Join Date: Oct 2003
Location: Valdosta, Ga, USA
Posts: 43
Sick_Generation HB User
Re: Possible Problem?

I will never cheat on anyone. But i just have these strong urges. :|

I've been thinking about calling it off for sometime now. But everytime we talk about it, she starts crying and says that we dont need to break up. So its almost like she wont let me. ;\

 
Old 12-28-2003, 10:07 PM   #7
Inactive
 
Join Date: Jun 2003
Location: WA
Posts: 166
serenity111 HB User
Re: Possible Problem?

just my opinion--- i would wait! how you feel at 21, you may not feel the same at 30! just my experience, i got married at 21, divorced at 28. i felt completely different at those 2 ages. when you get married young, you tend to feel tied down. if your having these feelings now, then maybe pospone getting married. i mean who says you have to get married---right now. be in a relationship for a long time with this person, but you dont neccesarrily have to get married. maybe laterdown the road, when you feel more ready. we all change and grow--and keeping a marriage strong, means growing together.... not to mention alot of work!!!!

 
Old 12-29-2003, 07:29 AM   #8
Junior Member
 
Join Date: Oct 2003
Location: Valdosta, Ga, USA
Posts: 43
Sick_Generation HB User
Re: Possible Problem?

^

wow thats exactly how i feel at times. I feel like if we get married soon, i will be tied down and my social life will die.

 
Old 12-29-2003, 02:36 PM   #9
Senior Veteran
(male)
 
Join Date: May 2003
Location: Florida
Posts: 3,190
Magnetic HB UserMagnetic HB User
Re: Possible Problem?

Getting married because you feel sorry for her is NOT a good reason to get married. I am sure she is a sweet girl and really loves you and you don't want to hurt her, but if you really, really loved her, you would not be having these feelings and you will certainly feel entrapped later. Also, if she really, really loved you, she would not use her tears to keep you, but would let you go to make sure she really is the right one for you.

A marriage might last, but the odds are against it and the odds are high that you will stray and end up causing her - and possible future children - a lot more pain later.

Please, break up with her now. If you two are meant to be, you will get back together later, when both of you will be more mature. It will hurt, but you know we are right.

 
Closed Thread

Similar Threads
Thread Thread Starter Board Replies Last Post
still in pain from anal fissures Gondore Bowel Disorders 73 05-04-2010 02:14 PM
Could this be possible?? BelieveYouMe Herpes 3 04-30-2010 07:22 AM
Possible foreign object in lung? blue_eyed_angel Open to All Other Health Topics 3 01-26-2008 07:16 AM
Possible Osteomyelitis or Trigeminal Neuralgia suedickman Trigeminal Neuralgia 13 04-03-2007 11:47 AM
Does this sound possible with test results. Ct-scan? gospel25514 Ear, Nose & Throat 2 09-16-2006 08:01 PM




Thread Tools

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is Off
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are Off
Pingbacks are Off
Refbacks are Off




Join Our Newsletter

Stay healthy through tips curated by our health experts.

Whoops,

There was a problem adding your email Try again

Thank You

Your email has been added








TOP THANKED CONTRIBUTORS



lenvegas (12), rosequartz (8), writeleft (6), Kszan (5), solofelix (5), Tivo123 (4), ladybud (4), Titchou (4), Kali333 (4), captjane (4)

Site Wide Totals

teteri66 (1180), MSJayhawk (1013), Apollo123 (909), Titchou (856), janewhite1 (823), Gabriel (763), ladybud (755), midwest1 (670), sammy64 (668), BlueSkies14 (607)



All times are GMT -7. The time now is 07:52 AM.



Site owned and operated by HealthBoards.comô
Terms of Use © 1998-2014 HealthBoards.comô All rights reserved.
Do not copy or redistribute in any form!