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Old 03-09-2004, 11:31 PM   #1
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Zeddy HB User
Unhappy What Should I Do!!!??

Hello, I really need some help. I've been with my girl for about three years. I'm 24 she's 21. I really love her but her sex drive has dropped to about once a week for the past year and a half or so. I have been trying EVERYTHING! (regular romance, conversations, etc) since then and just came to the conclusion thats just her sex drive. Everything else is great, i have tried compansating with masturbation but it just wont cut it, i have a really high sex drive and have been putting up with hers for a while now. Were together at leat 5 times a week, I cannot take it anymore.....what should i do, I do not want to move on we are really truly in love and i think she is the one but i'am extremly frustrated with my sex life....what do i do??

 
Old 03-10-2004, 12:10 AM   #2
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Katyana HB User
Re: What Should I Do!!!??

Quote:
Originally Posted by Zeddy
Hello, I really need some help. I've been with my girl for about three years. I'm 24 she's 21. I really love her but her sex drive has dropped to about once a week for the past year and a half or so. I have been trying EVERYTHING! (regular romance, conversations, etc) since then and just came to the conclusion thats just her sex drive. Everything else is great, i have tried compansating with masturbation but it just wont cut it, i have a really high sex drive and have been putting up with hers for a while now. Were together at leat 5 times a week, I cannot take it anymore.....what should i do, I do not want to move on we are really truly in love and i think she is the one but i'am extremly frustrated with my sex life....what do i do??
It sounds to me like there was more frequent sex for the first 1/2 of the relationship.

Have you tried talking to her about your sex life? She's very young, maybe she's been having second thoughts about being in a long term serious relationship at this time. Or maybe she's got alot going on in her life like college or something. Do you have kids? Often times a woman's sex drive diminishes in the face of childbirth and child rearing.

Either way, it's best if you sit down and have a serious talk about this. You say you have been "putting up with hers". You are sounding resentful in your post, and that's not a good thing. If this is in fact her normal sex drive, are you prepared to "put up" with it for the next 50 or 60 years? Talk to the girl and find out what's going on.

Don't sound like you are attacking her. Tell her that when the 2 of you first met and for the first 18 months or so of the relationship that you both craved each other and couldn't get enough of one another. And for the last 18 months you have noticed a change in that. Tell her that you still desire her and enjoy the physical aspect of your relationship very much and that you would like to make love to her more frequently and ask her how she feels about that.

It is quite possible that you are sexually incompatible. If there is nothing wrong and this is truely her normal sex drive, then you either have to accept it and take care of yourself in private as you do now, or move on and find a girl that enjoys sex as much as you do.

Last edited by Katyana; 03-10-2004 at 12:13 AM.

 
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Old 03-10-2004, 06:10 AM   #3
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Blastoff9600 HB UserBlastoff9600 HB User
Re: What Should I Do!!!??

Another aspect to consider is meds and that includes birth control. If she is on meds like anti-depressants or birth control those can effect a sex drive. Then there si also to consider her hormones levels might be out of whack,yes even at 21 her levels could be slightly or extremely out of whack and that can cause a lower sex drive. If it is either meds or hormones she can talk to her doctor about switching meds or testing her hormone levels.

Talking to her about your concerns without attacking or resentment is your best bet. Make sure it is a calm conversation without interruption and proper timing on when you talk.
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