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Old 07-29-2004, 09:49 AM   #1
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Question Oral vs intercourse

Just a question to throw out there...
Why is it that people who do not have intercourse will openly have oral sex with their partners and even "oral" one night stands?

I understand that with oral there is no risk for pregnancy, but that is the ONLY difference.
1. You are still being "intimate"
2. You are still at risk for STDs

Why please a man, when you aren't getting anything in return?

One more question. If you WON'T have intercourse, but do have oral, do you make them wear a rubber while you are going down?

And what about the men? Those of you who openly have oral. How do you prevent getting a STD while going down on a girl you hardly know?

Not trying to put anyone on the spot... Just some questions I have wanted to ask and feel this is a great forum to ask and get honest answers.

Thank you

Last edited by letfayhol; 07-29-2004 at 09:59 AM.

 
Old 07-29-2004, 12:03 PM   #2
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Re: Oral vs intercourse

hmmm, interesting...the only thing i can say is, some women get off going down on a man...to me, it's painful boring work...but i know my hubby loves going down on me and never asks anything in return...
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Old 07-29-2004, 01:25 PM   #3
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Re: Oral vs intercourse

Quote:
Originally Posted by letfayhol
Just a question to throw out there...
Why is it that people who do not have intercourse will openly have oral sex with their partners and even "oral" one night stands?
I think some people view different sexual activities as a degree along a continuim... on the one end is kissing, and on the other end is intercourse. Oral sex falls somewhere in between. Perhaps it is a progression of what they are ready for.. first kissing, then mutual masturbation, then oral, then intercourse.

You seem bothered by the thought of oral sex, or at least, you equate it with being the same as intercourse? That is fine if you feel that way. If I'm interpreting your question correctly, you don't see how people can feel ok about oral sex but don't want to have intercourse? Because, unlike you, they don't view them as the same.

Why please a man if you're not getting anything in return? Well, personally, if I was getting NOTHING from a man I sure would not be with him But, some women just like to perform oral sex on a man because it's fun

 
Old 07-29-2004, 01:33 PM   #4
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Re: Oral vs intercourse

I don't have a problem with oral if it is with someone I am in a relationship with.
I just don't get people going out, hooking up in a bar, a woman (or man) giving oral and never seeing each other again...
I don't view them as the same... However, I do view them both as sex with the risk of STDs... I just guess I am more careful than some people...

I have a friend who has women call him or come over, ask if they can please him, they do and they leave and he does nothing for them... I guess that is why I ask this question...

 
Old 07-29-2004, 01:59 PM   #5
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Re: Oral vs intercourse

Quote:
Originally Posted by letfayhol
I just guess I am more careful than some people...
You're smarter than most people... stay that way

 
Old 07-30-2004, 05:24 AM   #6
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Re: Oral vs intercourse

Quote:
Originally Posted by letfayhol
Why please a man, when you aren't getting anything in return?
Let me just flip the tables for a moment. My wife doesn't like give oral, but I still love giving her oral. This may bother a lot of guys in my situation but I have no problems with it because the sex is still very good. What I am getting in return is the satisfaction that I have given her an orgasm. Once she has orgasmed, I enter her once again and get my rocks off. Intercourse after her orgasm is just icing on the cake for her.

 
Old 07-30-2004, 09:28 AM   #7
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Re: Oral vs intercourse

Flood that is a little different because you are getting off after your wife. The poster is talking about women get a man off orally and then don't get the same back.

I've never understood that either but I guess that these women are getting something out of it otherwise they wouldn't be doing it. Mabye they like it and want the experience? I've read that really young girls are doing this and I would think that it lowers one's self esteem.

 
Old 07-30-2004, 09:34 AM   #8
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Re: Oral vs intercourse

Quote:
Originally Posted by trystme
Flood that is a little different because you are getting off after your wife. The poster is talking about women get a man off orally and then don't get the same back.

I've never understood that either but I guess that these women are getting something out of it otherwise they wouldn't be doing it. Mabye they like it and want the experience? I've read that really young girls are doing this and I would think that it lowers one's self esteem.

I agree. In addition, I would feel very used. But I am in my early 40's and have learned alot since my 20's, and one thing for sure,,,giving a man oral doesn't make them love you - especially if you picked them up in a bar a hour before!

 
Old 07-30-2004, 10:04 AM   #9
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Re: Oral vs intercourse

Quote:
Originally Posted by trystme
Flood that is a little different because you are getting off after your wife. The poster is talking about women get a man off orally and then don't get the same back.
Yes that is true. Since I'm not in the dating scene anymore I cannot comment directly to the original post. I guess my point is that I don't mind giving oral to my wife and don't expect oral in return.

I also agree with your statement about the low self esteem. What a sad state of affairs this is.

 
Old 07-30-2004, 10:09 AM   #10
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Re: Oral vs intercourse

Quote:
Originally Posted by Flood84
Yes that is true. Since I'm not in the dating scene anymore I cannot comment directly to the original post. I guess my point is that I don't mind giving oral to my wife and don't expect oral in return.

I also agree with your statement about the low self esteem. What a sad state of affairs this is.

Yes - Very sad. There was a post a few days ago regarding oral sex. Someone asked about receiving oral from a 13 yr old girl! (Btw, it wasn't a grown man asking, it was a young boy)
How sad is that? When I was 13 I was still bothering my older brother and worried about what jeans I was going to wear the next day! Certainly not thinking about giving oral sex to anyone.
It just really bothers me that our society has just gone to hell.

 
Old 07-31-2004, 06:23 AM   #11
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Re: Oral vs intercourse

It seems that since Cliton said he "did not have SEX with that woman", young people took that as truth & put oral sex in the same class of just kissing.

It kind of dates a person in how they think. If you were sexually mature before that speech you consider oral sex as another type of sexual intercourse, if you were not sexually mature at that time, then it is just another type of kissing.

Either way, it can still give you STD & most singles ignore that little fact until it is too late.

 
Old 07-31-2004, 07:49 AM   #12
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Re: Oral vs intercourse

First off any guy that would go down on a woman he is not in a relationship with is just crazy, I cant speak for why women do what they do but i can say I have had a couple 1 night stands when I was younger and did have intercourse but never had anyone in these 1 nighters go down on me nor did I go down on them, just straight intercourse with condoms, only oral I ever performed or had performed on me was in relationships

 
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