Whenever my girlfriend has given me oral sex, I have to use my hand to get into a state where whatever touches my penis will make it ejaculate. We've had sex now 2 times, the second being much faster than the first. I always hear of people ejaculating right away during their first experience. The problem with me is that both times I haven't been able to. I end up pulling out and then just using the excuse that I thought we were going to fast for her (she was in pain). But clearly there is a problem because after masturbating since, I noticed that it takes me a really long time to orgasm when I'm not looking at porn. I have to go faster with my hand than I would be able to having sex. My girlfriend says she feels like she's doing a bad job and that I might not think shes attractive. I tell her all the time that that's not the case. I'm definatly not gay and love women I just don't know why this is happening. I was wondering if there is any way I can...almost train my penis to ejaculate earlier? Is there anything I can do to make myself ejaculate faster because I really don't see myself orgasming having sex any time soon? Thanks.
Last edited by Mod-S4; 02-28-2005 at 04:44 PM.
Reason: Note edit to your post. Please use proper terminology.
y do u want to get it over so fast? if u dont mind me askin, how long r u 2 at it? well, i think u're thinking about orgasming too much, and maybe also during sex??? its a mental game, if u're mentally aroused 1st, it can help a lot (and not worrying about anything and just enjoying urself). if thats not the case, maybe u can try a faster speed w ur girl. or is she too wet? cuz if she is, theres no friction and u might have to try a certain position that will make her tighter for u. thats all i could think of on the spot, cuz i dont know ur situation too well. oh and u can try what the previous poster said, dont touch urself until the next time u see ur girl again.
It also might help to get out of the habit of using porn to masturbate now that you have a real live girl around...I'm not saying there's anything wrong with porn, not at all, but if you don't like the effect it's having on your sexual performance, you might try going without it and see if that helps. Or only use it once in awhile...now that you are starting to have sex with women, it'd be good to get out of the habit of needing porn to reach orgasm. I have found that my guy orgasms more quickly when I squeeze him as he's pulling our and sort of push out to expand myself when he's entering me. This also works well the other way around; all she needs to do is match your rhythm and have pretty strong control over her PC muscles.
When you masturbate very frequently over a long time your penis becomes accustomed to a certain amount of stimulation applied in a certain way. You know just how much pressure to apply when you masturbate and also just how fast you need to stroke to bring on the orgasm. When your penis is a vagina the amount of friction is quite different. While it is certainly stimulating it isnt the exact same feeling as when you masturbate yourself. It takes time to unlearn the masturbatory stimulation and become used to the pleasure of intercourse. The suggestion to abstain for a while before you have intercourse is a good one as is becoming aroused before you penetrate.
Agreed. You can squeeze and apply more pressure when you masturbate to customize the pleasure so to speak to your own liking in order to achieve ejaculations. When you have sex with a girl, the vagina is only so big and is not as flexible with it's accomodations. It may not be tight enough to stimulate you to orgasm if you are used to your hand. The only solution I would say for you is to be real disciplined and not look at porn, have sex, or masturbate for a month. Then have sex with your girfriend. If you still have trouble double the time away from it. Then try it. Eventually you will slowly work the sensitivity back where a vagina can stimulate you enough to ejaculate. If this still doesn't work, I would think about seeing a doctor about your problem.
You Did Not Mention Alcohol Are Some Drugs. My Experience Was That When I Had A Large Amount Of Alcohol I Was Able To Maintain An Erection But Was Unable To Ejaculate No Matter How Long I Was Stimulated.