OMG! Thank you guys so much for the insightful input. Ethera, ScruffyGuy: you really made me reconsidered the whole situation and gave me A LOT to think about. I didn't know how much skewed my view of things was on sex, especially my expectations when it comes to how guys should behave sexually and how they think about things.
Your advice comes at an important time since he asked me to move in with him and because of all of this I have been a bit hesitant to take that step.
I will definitely take your advice to heart. Thank you soooo much!!
Give this some time and put some of the ideas suggested here into practice and see what happens.
Most importantly of all -- DO NOT EVER blame yourself or think YOU are sexually unattractive. This is something a LOT of ladies tend to do -- and that's understandable: by nature, women are more emotionally tuned to sex than men are. Yes, you DO have sexual "responsibilities" to keep things interesting and fun for him -- but he has the SAME responsibilities to YOU. So, once you start doing new things and make it more interesting, HE will probably want to bring up suggestions of his own. And hey... just TELL him to suggest things to you -- odds are good he'll LOVE hearing that.
Two last things:
1) Men DO like variation and we ALWAYS look at other people. This is tough for some women to handle, and understandably so. Even us GUYS do not like it when our partners look at others, even though WE do it all the time! But just because we LOOK does NOT mean that we do not desire our partners anymore -- we just want new, fresh visual cues. YOU can help fill that need of his simply by changing things around, both sexually and in your appearance. Clothes, lingerie, hair, makeup, whatever... just mix it up a bit.
2) If he has asked you to move in with him, odds are good he's VERY much into you sexually. Not many guys would want to move in with a gal they do not find attractive! Let that ease your mind, OK?
Good luck and have FUN practicing new and exciting sex!
As a girl who thought kind of like you before about the initiation thing.. when i asked my partner about this i was told "i'm a guy, so never be afraid to initiate, guys will want to have sex anytime" hehe, so never be afraid or never think that a guy wont want you if you make the move
Hi kra, don't feel so sad . You have been with ur bf for more than 3 year and it's more than enough to understand each other. For me sex with zero foreplay is very bad . Sex is not juz vaginal penetration , it must begin with full of love . Kissing and oral sex can help in penis erection. From my experience also , after 10 or 15 minutes of penetration , my erection become not so hard . I pull it out from my gf vagina and ask her for oral , and it's working . After that we continue the vaginal intercourse until both of us achieve maximum climax . Sex is the most wonderful event in our life , so don't give up , try it again and again ...u will enjoy it .