Infections from partner's bad hygiene - Sexual Health - General Message Board

nancy30 · 10-17-2006, 12:08 PM

My husband doesn't take baths nearly as often as he should. I was wondering if I had sex with him, would that put me at risk for getting some kind of infection????? {I'm currently refusing to sleep with him}

would him taking a shower right before hand erase away the days of his not bathing prior to sex?????

it seems like bacteria would collect on a man's private area and I was wondering if taking one bath would wash it all away, or would it still be dirty from not taking a shower for many days, possibly causing me infection even though he showers right before sex (eg such as lingering bacteria, etc)

[PS It is disgusting and I refuse to have sex based on lack of showering, etc but if he did take a shower right before, I wanted to know if that would rid him of any bacteria, etc......his not bathing often is a topic for another post]

StenoLady1 · 10-17-2006, 12:50 PM

I would *think* yes, you could be at risk for an infection.

I only say this because last May, DH & I went to Disney for a week. I came back with a horrible UTI -- something I hadn't had in over 20 years. My doctor and I racked our brains on what could have caused it, as DH and I weren't having sex then, and I always kept clean, etc. Once I brought up the Disney trip to my doc and the fact that I was menstruating during the trip (ick), he asked if I washed my hands before using the facilities. I hadn't (always washed after, tho!!!!), and he thought that's what caused it, having my hands all germy from the parks, then handling "ladies things" without washing my hands first.

So, yeah, I think that things should be as clean as possible before they come in to contact with our vaginas.

Oh, I don't know how many times he would need to wash before being totally clean. Maybe a plumber's wife would be someone to ask?

Thisby · 10-17-2006, 04:07 PM

Assuming he bathed properly/thoroughly right before sex, he should be fine.

hergy · 12-20-2006, 12:46 AM

Does he know that you're unsatisfied with his hygiene? His attitude toward his own hygiene can tell a lot about his sense of self worth right now. It can also tell a lot about how much he regards your concerns.

His lingering bacteria can definitely promote infection. If he's agreeable, even though it may be a bit difficult for you, you could subtly suggest a sexy shower together. A sensual shower could be the incentive he needs to rekindle his interest in getting clean. It could also be arousing to him for you to actually gently begin stimulating, while cleaning, his penis during the shower.

Communication is essential in your relationship, whether it's about hygiene, finances or other concerns. If he loves you, he'll be as concerned about your needs as his own.