Re: My girlfriend doesn't like any sexual activity
My girlfriend and I have agreed to wait until we're married to "go all the way." And yes, I really did have a say in the decision. I figured she should have the final say, since she's the one who can become pregnant. Besides, I don't exactly feel like raising a kid while I'm still in college.
That being said, I think any couple should be pretty sexually active by a year and a half. This doesn't mean it has to be actual sex, but the hand jobs should be a minimum, or something that gives you release.
I'm also assuming you at least offer to give her sexual stimulation as well. Given what you've told us about her take on sex, I would guess she tells you she doesn't need to be aroused when you offer her sex. If she's reluctant enough, I'd say you need to talk to her about your needs. I'm sure if she opened up she'd enjoy it too (how can one not like to be aroused?), but guys especially need sexual attention. Not trying to gross anyone out, it's just true. It's our equivalent of receiving compliments or flowers, it's just something that's needed in a relationship.
If you end up having to talk to her, make sure you stress that you don't ONLY care about sex, but that it IS very important to you. And if her reluctance is due to shyness, then assure her that you want her to be extremely comfortable with you at this point--emotionally, intellectually, physically, and sexually. It's just something that you believe you should get in return for whatever you do for her. At the very least, she should care about your feelings and at least try to accomodate you. Make sure she knows you want to help her open up.
What's important is to reassure her that you LOVE any sexual activity with her, and that she has absolutely nothing to worry about. If you have to, you may have to refrain from intercourse and temporarily settle for other methods of release (hand jobs, oral, etc.). Try to go at her pace, but also let her know that as a male, you have needs.