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Old 06-23-2007, 11:24 AM   #1
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Why can't I ever enjoy anal self-pleasure?

I have two questions that I would like to address the general sexual health board about, I need more anwsers.
--
I use *****'s, but does that make me gay? I like sex with women and all, but I look at more gay porn than straight porn. Any ideas? (addressed before, but I need more anwsers, thanks!)
--
Now to the actual point of this topic, why can't I ever enjoy anal self- stimulation? I barely stuck a 3 inch pen which was smooth and covered in the only lube I had, Anti-Bacterial Hand Soap, (which im guessing irritated my bowels or something) But it hurt even during orgasm. I didn't rip anything, becuase there's no blood that I can feel back there of, but why can't I ever enjoy it? What do I need to do to make this more enjoyable, and better yet, what do I now that it's irritated. It hurts like all get out..

 
Old 06-23-2007, 06:08 PM   #2
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Re: Why can't I ever enjoy anal self-pleasure?

First of all, using a soap as a lube was a very bad idea. No wonder your anus was irritated. You really should see a doctor about that, you don't want it to turn into a very nasty infection or maybe something worse.

Enjoying anal sex is something that develops over time. You can't expect to enjoy it the very first time. You have to develop techniques, one starting with NOT using a pen and hand soap as lube. Once you get the feel of it, you should be enjoying it during orgasm.

As for the gay porn, have you considered the fact that maybe you are bisexual?

 
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Old 06-25-2007, 10:20 AM   #3
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Re: Why can't I ever enjoy anal self-pleasure?

Quote:
Originally Posted by JasonCJS View Post
I have two questions that I would like to address the general sexual health board about, I need more anwsers.
--
I use *****'s, but does that make me gay? I like sex with women and all, but I look at more gay porn than straight porn. Any ideas? (addressed before, but I need more anwsers, thanks!)
--
Now to the actual point of this topic, why can't I ever enjoy anal self- stimulation? I barely stuck a 3 inch pen which was smooth and covered in the only lube I had, Anti-Bacterial Hand Soap, (which im guessing irritated my bowels or something) But it hurt even during orgasm. I didn't rip anything, becuase there's no blood that I can feel back there of, but why can't I ever enjoy it? What do I need to do to make this more enjoyable, and better yet, what do I now that it's irritated. It hurts like all get out..
Start by ditching the soap. Head to the store and buy some appropriate lube. Maybe a ***** is still too big, so instead of feeling good it just hurts. And maybe the pen is too small... a pen may not be the safest thing to be using anyway. Have you tried just using your fingers?

Enjoying anal stimulation does not make you gay. Watching gay porn does not make you gay. Until you find yourself physically and emotionally atrracted to another man, then your interest in gay porn is probably curiousity, and intrigue.

 
Old 06-25-2007, 04:52 PM   #4
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Re: Why can't I ever enjoy anal self-pleasure?

Completely bypassing everyone elses answers, allow me to just state this: Does it really MATTER if you're gay? I mean, reallly. You are who you are. That's what is important.

That being said, not everybody enjoys anal play. You shouldn't force yourself to try it if you really don't like it.

And no, enjoying watching gay porn does not make you gay. Being gay isn't about the sexual aspect -- I know plenty of straight guys who like anal play and even watching other guys masturbate. Until you're emotionally attracted to a man, you're not even bi.

 
Old 06-29-2007, 10:28 AM   #5
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Re: Why can't I ever enjoy anal self-pleasure?

If I might add a bit to the already list of good advise! First, why do you feel that it is necessary for you to enjoy anal sex? Anal sex isn't for every one.

What turns one man on, doesn't turn on the next! Some men like a women's tongue in their ear, well that drives me crazy, I don't like that! It does nothing for me.Lol..

Did you know that in the gay world, if I might put it that way, You have tops, and you have bottoms! Everyone doesn't enjoy anal sex. Some men like to give, and some just like to take, and some love it both! Now that being said, let's explore why you don't. If you've never done this before, you're a virgin.
Now, if you were going to enter a virgin, you would have to use lubrication right? And you would need to be very patient using slow movements, entering an inch at a time.

If you're very big, you would have to use a lot of lub, and be very patient! Speaking of dildos, they do have small ones. If you insist on expeirencing anal sex, you're going to have to start with something small and lubricated. The mood has to be right, and you need the time and privacy! So, what I'm saying, if you are rushing as well as using the wrong toys, you're not going to get anything out of it but a sore bottom.

 
Old 07-01-2007, 07:37 PM   #6
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Re: Why can't I ever enjoy anal self-pleasure?

Quote:
Originally Posted by JasonCJS View Post
I have two questions that I would like to address the general sexual health board about, I need more anwsers.
--
I use *****'s, but does that make me gay? I like sex with women and all, but I look at more gay porn than straight porn. Any ideas? (addressed before, but I need more anwsers, thanks!)
--
Now to the actual point of this topic, why can't I ever enjoy anal self- stimulation? I barely stuck a 3 inch pen which was smooth and covered in the only lube I had, Anti-Bacterial Hand Soap, (which im guessing irritated my bowels or something) But it hurt even during orgasm. I didn't rip anything, becuase there's no blood that I can feel back there of, but why can't I ever enjoy it? What do I need to do to make this more enjoyable, and better yet, what do I now that it's irritated. It hurts like all get out..

Well, I think your problem is that you aren't relaxing your anus. I know it might be hard, but you have to learn to do it. The reason it hurts for everybody is because they tighten up their anus, which will cause pain if you have inserted something into it. I stimulate myself during masturbation and i can assure you I am not gay.

Last edited by Sidewalk Chalk; 07-01-2007 at 07:39 PM. Reason: Grammar Errors

 
Old 07-02-2007, 07:32 AM   #7
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Re: Why can't I ever enjoy anal self-pleasure?

Well I've never tried it, so I don't know...but looking at it from a biological standpoint, your anus is normally tight and closed. I would imagine that it would take time for it to get used to being penetrated in this type of fashion. Don't use soap though, get a good lubricant.

For your first question, no I don't think it makes you gay. Liking pleasure from something that society may deem abnormal has nothing to do with sexuality. Besides, if you were gay, you'd probably know more than we would.

-Greg

 
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