why don't people do something about it when it fades away?
Maybe because they get tired of jumping from one person to the next over and over again every time the passion fades out.Is it worth changing your entire life for some good sex that may only last one year?
Maybe because they get tired of jumping from one person to the next over and over again every time the passion fades out.Is it worth changing your entire life for some good sex that may only last one year?
Not for sex no.....
However Love is more than just about sex, more than just about kissing or cuddling etc.
There is an aspect to a relationship that enables and encourages people to grow on many levels, if its not there then the relationship is of no use.
DH and I love each other, but we don't show affection like before, but we're both okay with that. We just celebrated our 28th wedding anniversary and have two grown children. Our daughter still lives at home, and I think our son plans on moving back home due to our lousy economy and not being able to afford to live on his own anymore (we aren't much better off). Anyway, I'd say if the affection has gone by the wayside but neither person is bothered by it, then that's okay. If one of the partners in the marriage has a problem with that, though, then I'd say it's time for marriage counseling or maybe it's time to move on.
DH and I love each other, but we don't show affection like before, but we're both okay with that. I think it's probably close to half a year since we've had sex, which it really doesn't matter. We just celebrated our 28th wedding anniversary and have two grown children. Our daughter still lives at home, and I think our son plans on moving back home due to our lousy economy and not being able to afford to live on his own anymore (we aren't much better off). Anyway, I'd say if the affection has gone by the wayside but neither person is bothered by it, then that's okay. If one of the partners in the marriage has a problem with that, though, then I'd say it's time for marriage counseling or maybe it's time to move on.
I agree...to each his/her/their own, some couples are fine with it and thats great. I think in a perfect world people who dont need affection would mate up more frequently. But this is not the case [in my case] counseling is not an option for her so the only choice is to move on.
I agree...to each his/her/their own, some couples are fine with it and thats great. I think in a perfect world people who dont need affection would mate up more frequently. But this is not the case [in my case] counseling is not an option for her so the only choice is to move on.
It's a shame that she won't go for counseling. I'd hope that that would help, but if you say it's not an option for her, then I guess you've come to the right conclusion to move on. It must be really frustrating and sad that your desire affection and she won't give you any.
I'm just sorry that you're having to go through this ordeal, and I hope that you can find happiness someday. It's too bad that so much time was wasted, but that's not your fault, and you still have lots of time to be happy. I wasted eight years of my life with a guy who was verbally abusive and looking back, I don't know why I put up with it. We weren't married, just engaged, but we were together every day. I guess when you get settled in a relationship, whether it be dating or marriage, over time you get used to being with the same person and don't feel like starting all over again even if the relationship is far from ideal. You get to know the other person and his/her habits and try to see the good points about that person and overlook the bad. The thing is, you aren't really happy, and then one day you realize how much time has passed without things getting any better and you feel cheated out of the life that you should have had all along had it not been for this person who has taken up your time. You realize that it's time to move on, which is where you are at right now. Make plans and make it happen if you think there is no other solution in your situation. I wish you the best of luck starting over.
There was a time when I wished the same thing....that my sex drive would die away, because she is not the first. I mean, I have had other gf's in the past and eventually we ran into much the same situation, where my sex drive never decreases in fact it increases with the more sex I get and my performance gets better as well.
On the other hand, this IS part of what really makes me the person I am, not just sex but the whole affection part of life. So essentially I would have to abandon who I am and become a whole different person....I just cant do that.
I learned a lot about myself going threw this so I dont look at it as time waisted but just a hard lesson to learn about myself and what really is important to me. I spent my time and learned my lesson, I have no regrets about leaving her either. What has really been the sickening part is to actually watch the consistant pattern of how affection travels. The more I try to hug, kiss and show affection to her the more she would hug, kiss and show affection to her dog. I would walk into a room and find her snuggled up with the dog on the floor, with the dog roled over on its back and she holding it in her arms.
