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Old 05-11-2009, 01:35 PM   #1
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Orgasm Issues...

I have a problem. Ive never had an orgasm from sex before and its so dissappointing. This is going to sound really embarassing and strange but i need help. So when i was little i used to wad up a blanket and put it between my legs and prety much use my legs to grind the blanket into my "area" and i would be able to orgasm. I can still do this and have an orgasm. But when i try to have an orgasm by just using my hands or a toy, i cant! And i cant orgasm from sex either. I dont know what im doing wrong, or whats wrong with me. I know you just have to try different angles and different things to have an orgasm but i cant, other than grinding myself against a blanket. To me thats a little weird and creepy. I just want to be able to do it like a normal person. Please help...

so embarassed

 
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Old 05-11-2009, 02:57 PM   #2
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Re: Orgasm Issues...

At least you know that you can and that's a start. Now, the problem is you've trained yourself in childhood how to experience pleasure which now you have to retrain your mind and body to achieve that pleasure with other stimulation. It sounds to me that you would benefit from the C.A.T. (coital allignment technique) which is merely the rubbing and grinding of the pubic bone against your partner's pubic bone, penetration isn't necessary but possible, though not as deeply ( also a benefit if the female doesn't tolerate deep penetration comfortably). It may seem odd and a bit embarrasing at first but you can also mimmick the grinding against your partner's thigh or knee to orgasm. Once you begin to experience pleasure your confidence will increase and so will your orgasmic ability. Allot of women can't experience orgasm from intercourse alone so you are not alone in that regard. Around 80% of females need stimulation that's not provided by intercourse so don't be embarrased about having to learn and re-learn how to experience pleasure. A patient and caring partner will never be concerned about how you get yours but that you do eventually get your "O". Good luck and keep trying other methods. Let your body guide you and don't let your own mind sabotage your efforts.

 
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Old 05-11-2009, 06:14 PM   #3
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Re: Orgasm Issues...

I agree with the above post.. your body probably got used to its "usual" way of having an orgasm, so any new way is harder for you. You might want to try to go for a sex position that will give you a similar sensation, like being on top. You might have to experiment with angles, how exactly to be sitting, etc. Just keep trying and one day it's bound to happen! Meanwhile just have fun and don't worry, just enjoy (although I know it's frustrating!). You also might want to NOT give yourself an orgasm the usual way for now and let it build up and that might make it happen easier a new way!

 
Old 05-11-2009, 08:59 PM   #4
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Re: Orgasm Issues...

No orgasm is a bad orgasm.

 
Old 05-20-2009, 01:00 PM   #5
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Re: Orgasm Issues...

I agree with others that it is a matter of training, reconditioning. I can relate. My intial sexual experiences required me to lie quiet and motionless so that no one would know what i was doing, and as such, find it much easier to orgasm if i am silent and still.

it's a matter of relaxing, taking your time, and retraining over time.

 
Old 06-09-2009, 12:19 PM   #6
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Re: Orgasm Issues...

well dont feel bad or embarrased i've never had one period

 
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