My husband will not have sex with me, in the 2 yrs. we been together I can count on one hand. He sleeps on couch, does not hug me, no affection at all of any kind. When we go out he will hug & kiss other women, (friends) will dance with them but rarely with me anymore. I sit by myself for sometime before he even agnoliges me. He lets the other women hang on him, I cannot. He undresses them with his eyes, looks at their breast on those who wish to show them. He likes what some men refer to as spinners. Very skinny girls and young. I love him so much, and I am told he loves me. ( I don't feel like he does) His friends says he speaks very highly of me, they tell me how beautiful I am and how lucky he is. What can I do if anything? And why are men like that.
daffy, whatever is going on you will not be able to figure this out alone, or with another's opinions. As beautiful as your husband thinks that you are, the problem still exists. For me, what he is doing is totally unacceptable in what should be a very loving marriage. And that includes intimacy.
I would ask my husband for that heart to heart talk because what does not get talked about will get acted out. Can I suggest Couple's therapy?
I DO wish you the best. Your husband gawking at other women is very insulting to you and I am sure that your feelings are very, very hurt
He owes you a detailed explanation, plain and simple.
I wish you the best hun.
Thank you for your response. I have approached the subject with him, at first he said a few things that made sence to a certain point. When I asked why he had sex before with other girls and not now he said he has nothing to prove anymore. We have shared special moments, he can be so passionate, but that has been awhile ago. I need to quit thinking about the past and start focusing on the future. There are a lot of us as children that has went through some sort of abuse, but we get through it. He did tell me at one time he has no respect for women, but I know he has to have some for me or he would not have married me. Just when you think one thing gets figured out there are 3 other things to take its place. Who knows, I just might up and leave one day, I wish life came with book of answers.
I'm sorry your going through this. I can completely understand cause I have been there, not that extreme but yes I've been there.
In my opinion there are three reasons if a man doesn't want to have sex:
1. He is having sex with another woman. Which I don't think its what is happening in your case. Cause if he was cheating on you, you would have known til now.
2. He is satisfying his sexual needs by masturbating. This was my case, and the starring at other women fits the scenario as well. Compulsive masturbation creates a sexual dysfunction.
3. He has a medical problem and his sex drive is extremely low. Is your husband on antideppresants?
As far as undressing other woman with his eyes, he might not help himself. If he has some kind of sexual dysfunction, every woman is a sex object to him. These people have intimacy problems, and its hard for them to not see every woman as a sex object.It is extremely disrespectful!!! I agree!!