Oral sex.... - Sexual Health - General Message Board

kth911 · 08-27-2003, 04:28 PM

My girlfriend loves receiving oral sex but she does not like to give it. And if it was up to her she would only receive it. I've never ejacultaed in her mouth, but I have releases some pre-*** (I find oral sex very pleasurable but I cant climax from a couple minutes of it). She does not like the taste at all. Every time I perform oral sex on her she lies down and relax not thinking about pleasing me. And when she does finally do it she acts like it's a chore, and because of this I tell her to stop. I don't know what it is exactly, I asked her, and she said she just doesn't like it. I've performed it on her 4 times and she's performed it on my 3. To be honest I do not like the taste,consistency, and smell of her vagina but I did it anyway because I love her and I know she loves it.
We havn't done it anymore since then. But I'm sure she would want me to do it for her. But I'm not going to do it for her if she won't do for me and not have a reason why. Am I wrong???....It's no fun anyway when she does it, she expects me to ejaculate in 2 minutes, and while doing it she cant wait to go spit it out and wash her mouth with listerine. It's not like my penis is not clean or anything...
I'm just frustrated by the lack of sexual plessure and fun in our relationship. We've been together for 10 months now and we are about to start college, I am hoping that things will get better in this department. This is the only area of or relationship that we have problems in. And no we have not had sex yet.

[This message has been edited by bfl (edited 08-27-2003).]

JesusGirl · 08-27-2003, 04:37 PM

I know I'm in a minority, but I find it hard to empathize with women who hate giving oral. I've only been that intimate with one guy (my serious current bf), and I really love it. I get really into it, and I make eye contact a lot of the time because it's such a sensual turn-on. When she goes down on you, is it obvious that you like it? Sometimes it will be easier for a girl to do something like that if it's very clearly making her partner VERY happy.

kth911 · 08-27-2003, 04:45 PM

Sometimes she asks me "well, di u ejaculate". And I tell her well no because for 1 you weren't enjoying it,that took the fun out and 2)It wasn't long enough. I won't force her into doing something she dosn't want but I do expect to have some sexual excitement in our relationship..is that too much for a 18 year to ask for?

[This message has been edited by bfl (edited 08-27-2003).]

Shel1974 · 08-27-2003, 06:04 PM

Well maybe your size has something to do with it. My husband is bigger around than my mouth can accomadate and it hurts my jaw a lot. The more often I do it, the less it hurts, but it is definitely a lot of work for me. Also, if you moan while she does it, it will let her know she is doing a good job and she will want to finish for your enjoyment. Talk to her and let her know how close you are, so she will know how much longer she has to go. Also keep your hair neatly trimmed down there, it cuts down on odor and tickling of the face!!

Good Luck. I know this can be a big problem for a lot of couples, so you are NOT alone

Audrey-B · 08-27-2003, 06:23 PM

Some males do produce a lot of precum fluid which has a rather sticky consistency and seems to get stuck in the throat. Maybe this is what she's objecting to?

I do see what you mean though, you would like her to be into you, so to speak, as you are into her. Often something mightn't be the most pleasant taste or feel, yet we do it b/c it makes us feel good that our partner is getting enjoyment from our giving. Other times something can seem gross or messy, yet extremely erotic when both people are into it.

You are both young and probably each other's first partners. Regardless of what couples will or won't do for each other, they do need to understand how each others bodies work sexually. Some men might orgasm after 2 minutes of sucking, but most of these guys suffer premature ejaculation and could orgasm from just a few strokes of the hand. What you need to do is not lecture her or show impatience. You need to sit down with her and lovingly talk about the issues you both have regarding oral. She is young and she may need time to get used to some of the things you want. You will need to learn that some compromises are required in a sexual relationship. Some females don't like having a penis in their mouth, let alone having a man orgasm in their mouth. If your g/f belongs to this group, yet you really do want oral stimulation, you may need to rethink what is important to you, the relationship or the sexual stimulation.