The First Time - Sexual Health - General Message Board

lowcam · 09-04-2003, 03:11 PM

I am getting married here in a couple of weeks and I have a question. Both me and my fiance are virgins and will be until our wedding day. She has recently gone to the gynocologist and was told that she was very tight. The doctor put his finger in her vagina and she felt so much pain that she told her to let everything go naturally or if that does not work then they will put her under and cut her open. My question comes to this: on the first night I want it to be enjoyable for us both, are there any suggestions for this? aka lubrication, foreplay that will help her open up, etc.

MrNice · 09-04-2003, 04:04 PM

Certainly using lubrication is always a good idea. You can "stretch" her hymen using your finger(s) and lubricant so as make penetration by your penis on your wedding night easier.

However, if the gyno said she is so tight that she might need surgical intervention to make sex comfortable you might want to consider her having the surgery before your first intercourse so that the first time (and all the subsequent times) are pleasurable for her. Why make the first experience an unpleasent one for her or make your honeymoon less than great?

mlgable · 09-04-2003, 10:58 PM

Has she had any problems with past pap/pelvic exams? If this was her first how did the pap smear part of it go for her where the doc inserts a speculum into the vagina? For you wedding night you will want to have some lube on hand but be sure it is something better than KY jelly. Use plenty of foreplay and take your time with things. Make using the lube part of the foreplay. If things don't go as well as you expected just relax and remember that you have a whole lifetime to figure out what will work for the two of you sexually.

portofino · 09-05-2003, 01:48 AM

Lubrication, go slow, enjoy prolonged foreplay,go slow, lubrication. One further suggestion would be to allow your partner to go on top. Thus, she shall be able to go at her pace.
I'm sure you'll be fine and all the v.best for the wedding.

Tigrazhia · 09-05-2003, 06:59 PM

Maybe, to be sure she at least enjoys parts of the night, bring her to an orgasm orally & with your fingers before you proceed with intercourse.

That way if she should happen to be in a lot of pain later, if this is inevitable, although you will still probably feel bad, you will still have pleased her & given her an orgasm.