bynalivein

Hello,

We had our first sex "attempt (yes it was just an attempt)" but it was a big fail. Let me explain.
Before 18th February, we never had sex in our life. We both were virgin. We're deeply in love with each other and we are willing to spend whole life with each other. We decided to have sex. I purchased a condom. we both were relaxed, I put my condom and started pushing it in her vagina. As we used to have Oral sex and mutual masturbation before. I was not worried about bleeding through vagina. Due to fingering, her vagina was good enough to get my penis.

While putting on condom, I was scared of having sex. Because of which, I lost my erection as soon as I put condom over my penis. Still I tried to push it inside her vagina. Later I started sex with little faster. She got hurt, I know I did mistake. But instead of thinking anything I did a rough sex and in between that condom got broken. We stopped having sex immediately, I purchased Morning after pills. FORTUNATELY, she had a period 4-5 days after taking a pill. The periods are normal now..

Since that scary experience, I started loosing the faith on condoms. But even after such experience, we forgot everything and tried to have sex 2nd time. 2nd time also, I lost my erection just because I was worried about condom breakage.

after few weeks, we tried it 3rd time. I decided, whatever may happen, I'll never think about past. And I retained the erection, we had superb sex but even after 20-30 minutes, I was not able to ejaculate. She got orgasm and I stopped and later used my hand to ejaculate.

On 4th time, Erection lasted for some 10 minutes but again, because of my roughness she got hurt. Whenever I remove my penis from her vagina to change position, it's like I loose erection.

Now she stopped believing me. She just keep saying me, she will not have sex before marriage. I don't know, why I feel like "Condom will break during sex"

I and her make sure that condom is properly wore.. But still my worries never stop.

Please give me some advice so that I will stop worrying about it. can we do normal sex with condom? Or I have to slow down when I use condom?

Another very important thing I would like to ask..

My Penis is hard enough while putting on a condom but after putting, the head becomes little small and soft. As penis head is shrink, there's room in between condom and penis head. I remove all the air but is it normal that penis head becomes soft after putting on a condom and before sex? Can I have a sex?

Thank you so much in advance, Please help me. I want to seduce my girl. I love her so much and I don't wanna loose her just because of this.

Regards..