It appears you have not yet Signed Up with our community. To Sign Up for free, please click here....



Sexual Health - General Message Board
Post New Thread   Closed Thread
LinkBack Thread Tools
Old 11-20-2011, 10:49 AM   #1
Newbie
(female)
 
Join Date: Oct 2010
Location: houston tx
Posts: 1
lexi4 HB User
Senior husband decided to not have sex but...

I guess many seniors choose to not have sex, but why do that if you just replace it with masturbation? Makes me feel cheated,and really - cheated on.
Anyone in this position, and if so, how does a woman handle the rejection? It's not just the 'act' but the intimacy, affection, etc that goes along with it. How do you keep from letting it rob you of your identity, after so many years of being a "wife", now just a room mate.

 
Old 12-26-2011, 03:22 PM   #2
Junior Member
(female)
 
Join Date: Feb 2011
Location: UK
Posts: 29
Fieryimp HB User
re: Senior husband decided to not have sex but...

Quote:
Originally Posted by lexi4 View Post
I guess many seniors choose to not have sex, but why do that if you just replace it with masturbation? Makes me feel cheated,and really - cheated on.
Anyone in this position, and if so, how does a woman handle the rejection? It's not just the 'act' but the intimacy, affection, etc that goes along with it. How do you keep from letting it rob you of your identity, after so many years of being a "wife", now just a room mate.
I have just started a thread about my own problem which is similar
I obviously can't answer your question " how to handle rejection " as I am in the same boat so to speak ... so sorry .
I know my situ is not going to improve but I do hope your does
I am just really saying there are others in the same boat so to speak if that helps . best wishes .

 
Sponsors Lightbulb
   
Old 07-31-2012, 08:33 AM   #3
Senior Member
(female)
 
Ilovedollhouses's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2011
Location: Happiness U.S.A.
Posts: 135
Ilovedollhouses HB UserIlovedollhouses HB UserIlovedollhouses HB UserIlovedollhouses HB User
re: Senior husband decided to not have sex but...

I, too, am older...I have found that men can get out of the habit of having sex far easier than we women...I truly believe that many are satisfied that way....Our problem is keeping them alive...I found that as my husband aged that I took over as the leader of the pack...I made the overtures...Started in some sexual ways and it worked...Now that I have him back on track he knows that after sex that he feels better and has made us much closer....

Have either of you asked your partner to stimulate you?...By this I mean do the foreplay or masturbate you?....This could be the beginning of a rebirth to your sex life....Take care...ILD..

 
Old 08-02-2012, 05:57 AM   #4
Junior Member
(female)
 
Join Date: Feb 2011
Location: UK
Posts: 29
Fieryimp HB User
re: Senior husband decided to not have sex but...

Quote:
Originally Posted by Ilovedollhouses View Post
I, too, am older...I have found that men can get out of the habit of having sex far easier than we women...I truly believe that many are satisfied that way....Our problem is keeping them alive...I found that as my husband aged that I took over as the leader of the pack...I made the overtures...Started in some sexual ways and it worked...Now that I have him back on track he knows that after sex that he feels better and has made us much closer....

Have either of you asked your partner to stimulate you?...By this I mean do the foreplay or masturbate you?....This could be the beginning of a rebirth to your sex life....Take care...ILD..
Hi and thanks for your post ILD
I'm afraid I've tried everything but there is no interest at all ..
I have asked for oral too and no interest - so never had oral either
I think you are right about the Majority of Men as they get older ..they kinda will probably talk about it (if they see a younger woman )with their mates/collegues but don't actually perform any more in their personal lives .

Its not going to happen I'm afraid sadly I have to semi satisfy myself with toys ..but its just not fullfilling me at all ..I need the whole hog so to speak
Many Thanks ILD

 
Old 08-02-2012, 11:00 AM   #5
Senior Member
(female)
 
Ilovedollhouses's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2011
Location: Happiness U.S.A.
Posts: 135
Ilovedollhouses HB UserIlovedollhouses HB UserIlovedollhouses HB UserIlovedollhouses HB User
re: Senior husband decided to not have sex but...

Hi again: Have you tried awakening him giving him oral sex?....Just some teasing...A little at a time...A man needs to feel confident in himself...Think he is a stud...He deals with his own inner thoughts and they are of a man that cannot be potent....The only thing is that he can....However, he must believe in himself...Good luck and I will keep an eye on this thread...Take care....ILD....

 
Old 01-15-2013, 04:08 PM   #6
Newbie
(male)
 
Join Date: May 2005
Location: B.C., Canada
Posts: 9
lansur HB User
re: Senior husband decided to not have sex but...

Even though this thread seems a little stale-dated, I am going to give something to think about from a male point of view. I am a "junior senior" and, over the past couple of years, for 1 reason or another, have lost all interest in sex. I have a pretty, nearly 2 decade younger wife; I have always been, at least in my mind, fairly above normal sex drive. I am, although 66 yrs old, still athletic, fairly good looking and 'masculine' looking. When you women think that perhaps your man has lost interest in you, it is quite likely he has lost interest in all women. It is a tough self-realization to admit and often it is understandable for the man to admit that he is no longer interested in you as a sexual object, than to admit he has become something akin to a eunoch. So don't take it personally! And, remember, it is much more difficult to thread the needle (the male) than to hold the needle steady (the female). If you get my drift. So, again, please don't question his love for you, but honour that commitment that you gave to him (read: each other) so many years ago!

Last edited by lansur; 01-15-2013 at 04:09 PM.

 
Old 01-15-2013, 08:50 PM   #7
Senior Member
(female)
 
Ilovedollhouses's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2011
Location: Happiness U.S.A.
Posts: 135
Ilovedollhouses HB UserIlovedollhouses HB UserIlovedollhouses HB UserIlovedollhouses HB User
re: Senior husband decided to not have sex but...

IMO, if a man decides that his sexual days are over then he should still consider the woman he partnered or married and fill her needs....I agree that the male and female sexual desire life is and can be as different as night and day as well as know that a man can and must be kept stimulated to enjoy this treasured time in life...Just as an aging woman needs to keep herself stimulated or she will dry up, a man must do the same...

I feel that if a man decides that he is done sexually that he owes it to his partner to stimulate her and bring her to orgasm...Who knows this happening could help him along the way....Take care...ILD....

 
Old 07-28-2013, 01:19 PM   #8
Junior Member
(female)
 
Join Date: Feb 2011
Location: UK
Posts: 29
Fieryimp HB User
re: Senior husband decided to not have sex but...

Quote:
Originally Posted by Ilovedollhouses View Post
IMO, if a man decides that his sexual days are over then he should still consider the woman he partnered or married and fill her needs....I agree that the male and female sexual desire life is and can be as different as night and day as well as know that a man can and must be kept stimulated to enjoy this treasured time in life...Just as an aging woman needs to keep herself stimulated or she will dry up, a man must do the same...

I feel that if a man decides that he is done sexually that he owes it to his partner to stimulate her and bring her to orgasm...Who knows this happening could help him along the way....Take care...ILD....
Totally Agree ILDH
I am totally frustrated by the lack of stimulation and feel I am being denied
I find no toy that satisfies me and my libido is (despite the lack of sex for many years which was in a previous relationship many moons ago prior to marriage of course ) is still extremely high although with lack of use I'm beginning to dry up more ...I really want to be sexually active or even to receive oral , that would suffice , but its not going to happen sadly thanks to those that post with similar problems ..it helps that others have the same problem .

Last edited by Fieryimp; 07-28-2013 at 02:24 PM.

 
Old 07-28-2013, 02:08 PM   #9
Senior Veteran
(female)
 
Join Date: Feb 2007
Location: Chester, VA
Posts: 1,721
noevr HB Usernoevr HB Usernoevr HB Usernoevr HB Usernoevr HB Usernoevr HB Usernoevr HB Usernoevr HB Usernoevr HB Usernoevr HB Usernoevr HB User
re: Senior husband decided to not have sex but...

Hi thinking on the medical side of it, its probably low testosterone. If you can talk him into a checkup and blood draw and have it checked I would. Just be care with the creams don't let it get on anyone else even pets. They do have a underarm roll on now. Cathy

 
Old 07-28-2013, 02:16 PM   #10
Junior Member
(female)
 
Join Date: Feb 2011
Location: UK
Posts: 29
Fieryimp HB User
re: Senior husband decided to not have sex but...

Quote:
Originally Posted by noevr View Post
Hi thinking on the medical side of it, its probably low testosterone. If you can talk him into a checkup and blood draw and have it checked I would. Just be care with the creams don't let it get on anyone else even pets. They do have a underarm roll on now. Cathy
I'm afraid I've tried everything to make him reaiise that he needs help but he really just doesn't care to have sex any more ..he doesn't wish medical help and is happy as he is - I am not so feel terribly deprived


If this reply was aimed at me I'm not sure what is meant by the underarm roll on ..thanks

 
Old 07-28-2013, 02:26 PM   #11
Senior Veteran
(female)
 
Join Date: Feb 2007
Location: Chester, VA
Posts: 1,721
noevr HB Usernoevr HB Usernoevr HB Usernoevr HB Usernoevr HB Usernoevr HB Usernoevr HB Usernoevr HB Usernoevr HB Usernoevr HB Usernoevr HB User
re: Senior husband decided to not have sex but...

The underarm rollon for the testostorone

 
Old 07-28-2013, 02:34 PM   #12
Junior Member
(female)
 
Join Date: Feb 2011
Location: UK
Posts: 29
Fieryimp HB User
re: Senior husband decided to not have sex but...

Quote:
Originally Posted by noevr View Post
The underarm rollon for the testostorone
Hi , I've never used Underarm roll on and don't posseess 1 in the house
What would it be used for other than its intended use " Under Arm "
Am I being thick

Last edited by Fieryimp; 07-28-2013 at 02:35 PM.

 
Old 07-28-2013, 02:40 PM   #13
Senior Veteran
(female)
 
Join Date: Feb 2007
Location: Chester, VA
Posts: 1,721
noevr HB Usernoevr HB Usernoevr HB Usernoevr HB Usernoevr HB Usernoevr HB Usernoevr HB Usernoevr HB Usernoevr HB Usernoevr HB Usernoevr HB User
re: Senior husband decided to not have sex but...

Its one way you apply the testostorone. They dispense it in a rollon.

 
Old 07-28-2013, 02:43 PM   #14
Junior Member
(female)
 
Join Date: Feb 2011
Location: UK
Posts: 29
Fieryimp HB User
re: Senior husband decided to not have sex but...

Quote:
Originally Posted by noevr View Post
Its one way you apply the testostorone. They dispense it in a rollon.
I didn't know this ..would this be via one Doctor ?
Or is it available in pharmacists - thanks ...I'm pretty green aren't I ?

 
Old 07-28-2013, 02:56 PM   #15
Senior Veteran
(female)
 
Join Date: Feb 2007
Location: Chester, VA
Posts: 1,721
noevr HB Usernoevr HB Usernoevr HB Usernoevr HB Usernoevr HB Usernoevr HB Usernoevr HB Usernoevr HB Usernoevr HB Usernoevr HB Usernoevr HB User
re: Senior husband decided to not have sex but...

Yeah you gotta see primary care probably get a prescription .cathy

 
The Following User Says Thank You to noevr For This Useful Post:
Fieryimp (07-29-2013)
Closed Thread

Similar Threads
Thread Thread Starter Board Replies Last Post
Low Testosterone at 65 years old Rio2007 Senior Health 5 03-28-2012 03:53 PM




Thread Tools

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is Off
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are Off
Pingbacks are Off
Refbacks are Off




Join Our Newsletter

Stay healthy through tips curated by our health experts.

Whoops,

There was a problem adding your email Try again

Thank You

Your email has been added








TOP THANKED CONTRIBUTORS



lenvegas (12), rosequartz (8), writeleft (6), Kszan (5), Tivo123 (4), ladybud (4), Titchou (4), Kali333 (4), solofelix (4), captjane (4)

Site Wide Totals

teteri66 (1164), MSJayhawk (997), Apollo123 (896), Titchou (832), janewhite1 (823), Gabriel (757), ladybud (745), sammy64 (666), midwest1 (665), BlueSkies14 (610)



All times are GMT -7. The time now is 10:57 AM.



Site owned and operated by HealthBoards.comô
Terms of Use © 1998-2014 HealthBoards.comô All rights reserved.
Do not copy or redistribute in any form!