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Old 05-15-2012, 10:42 AM   #1
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Trouble with orgasming

I'm 20 years old and have been sexually active since I was about 15. Ive been in 2 long term relationships with different men and I'm having trouble reaching orgasm. My current boyfriend has tried neumerous amounts of times to help me reach orgasm but we've had no success. Ive used vibrators and I think I've gotten close once. I'm really frustrated by this because I've tried different approaches. Too much clitoral stimulation hurts and tears the lips away from the clitoris. My legs start to shake but it's not a pleasent feeling. Can anyone help give me ideas on things to try? I'm not stressed out and I'm in a healthy, loving, caring relationship.

 
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Old 05-15-2012, 12:26 PM   #2
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Re: Trouble with orgasming

One thing that helps me (and this is weird, I admit) is flexing my abdominal muscles much like I'm doing a crunch sit up- I don't know why but if I do that while having sex or masturbating it makes it much easier to orgasm.

 
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Old 05-15-2012, 04:44 PM   #3
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Re: Trouble with orgasming

Well, then keep on trying hun! Try not to put to much pressure on yourself and your boyfriend. It will happen. Try using lube, try a softer approach to clitoral stimulation, if you are in a happy, loving, caring relationship, explore, experiment, test! You guys together will eventually make it happen. I know for me, it always took time for to get "really comfortable" with the guy I was with, with my current guy, it took 6 months for me to finally orgasm from sex, a lot of sex with me on top, that way, you can gently grind your clitoris against him. And what about oral? Have him try different "movements" with his tongue, and maybe include his fingers inside, that always helps me a lot, with those two combined. But, the more pressure and stressed you are about trying to orgasm, your going to mess up your mind, and be so darn focused on trying to achieve one, you might actually be messing with your head, and not able to really be in the moment and just enjoy it. Remember, the mind is your biggest sexual organ.

 
Old 05-20-2012, 11:15 PM   #4
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Cool Re: Trouble with orgasming

Quote:
Originally Posted by SDF92 View Post
I'm 20 years old and have been sexually active since I was about 15. Ive been in 2 long term relationships with different men and I'm having trouble reaching orgasm. My current boyfriend has tried neumerous amounts of times to help me reach orgasm but we've had no success. Ive used vibrators and I think I've gotten close once. I'm really frustrated by this because I've tried different approaches. Too much clitoral stimulation hurts and tears the lips away from the clitoris. My legs start to shake but it's not a pleasent feeling. Can anyone help give me ideas on things to try? I'm not stressed out and I'm in a healthy, loving, caring relationship.
Hey its not a big deal if you havent had the big O yet. This very common in relatioships so take your time you have to find out what really works for you. I have been with my gf for 8 years now and it took me at lease two years before she had her first orgasm. It took me to realise that no matter how many people you have been intimate with no one persons body reacts the same during sex. I mean it really had me down about not helping her reach her climax. So I started to read up on different things that interested her. I say that to say this oral may not be your thing or maybe he's a little to rough try to get him to take his time. You as men we rush to make things happen thinking if we go fast and be rough with women like the guys in flicks it will help. Try to relax and not try to have an orgasm and just let it happen. Sounds to me you think so much about it that when your close you try to force it. REMEMBER JUST RELAX ENJOY EACH OTHER. Try to masterbate when your being intimate it may help. Show him what you like and how you like it. We men will never know if you don't show us how you like it. Good luck hope I was able to help you a little. Have fun
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