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Old 11-30-2004, 05:55 AM   #1
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LeeAnn7 HB User
GIRL- needing advice from you GUYS!!

Ok- I have a situation that I could use a guy's perspective on please. I'm 23 and I have only had sex one time and had a baby as a result of that one time. (don't ask...) Anyways- the my boyfriend knows all about my past and is aware that even though I have a child- I have only been with someone once. Since we started dating I went on BC and we've "messed around" from time to time but haven't had intercourse.. Well the other night we were fooling around and we got a little crazy and he had the tip in me... I wouldn't say we had sex- I mean everything was there- but we stopped right away because I only started the pill about 3 weeks ago and we don't want a baby.. Well the problem is this- the next morning he asked me if I was ok which confused me. He said that when he got up in the middle of the night he saw blood on his boxers and his hands.. and he wanted to make sure I was ok.. I don't know how what we did was enough to make me bleed again (I thought that after the first time it wouldn't happen again) besides that I figured having a baby would make that impossible?? My question is this: If this were you and your girlfriend what would you be thinking, feeling? Is this going to freak him out? I'm going to talk to him tonight and would like some advice and some insight to what he might be thinking. Since we didn't "finish" I guess the same thing will happen when he penetrates me all the way and now I'm worrying about that.... any advice, comments, experience in this would be SO helpful. Thanks a bunch guys!

 
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Old 11-30-2004, 06:12 AM   #2
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turbonamja HB User
Re: GIRL- needing advice from you GUYS!!

Quote:
Originally Posted by LeeAnn7
Ok- I have a situation that I could use a guy's perspective on please. I'm 23 and I have only had sex one time and had a baby as a result of that one time. (don't ask...) Anyways- the my boyfriend knows all about my past and is aware that even though I have a child- I have only been with someone once. Since we started dating I went on BC and we've "messed around" from time to time but haven't had intercourse.. Well the other night we were fooling around and we got a little crazy and he had the tip in me... I wouldn't say we had sex- I mean everything was there- but we stopped right away because I only started the pill about 3 weeks ago and we don't want a baby.. Well the problem is this- the next morning he asked me if I was ok which confused me. He said that when he got up in the middle of the night he saw blood on his boxers and his hands.. and he wanted to make sure I was ok.. I don't know how what we did was enough to make me bleed again (I thought that after the first time it wouldn't happen again) besides that I figured having a baby would make that impossible?? My question is this: If this were you and your girlfriend what would you be thinking, feeling? Is this going to freak him out? I'm going to talk to him tonight and would like some advice and some insight to what he might be thinking. Since we didn't "finish" I guess the same thing will happen when he penetrates me all the way and now I'm worrying about that.... any advice, comments, experience in this would be SO helpful. Thanks a bunch guys!
So he had just the tip of his penis in you and you bled from that? Maybe it was your period? How long have you been going out with him? He seems like he cares enough to ask you how you are feeling ... I would just straight up ask him how he feels. But, you should not feel sorry for bleeding you know? If you are scared on where it came from, go see your doctor and ask him/her if that is normal. Best of luck!

 
Old 11-30-2004, 06:37 AM   #3
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LeeAnn7 HB User
Unhappy Re: GIRL- needing advice from you GUYS!!

We've been together over 2 months- but we've known each other since HS. It was not my period- he didn't even question that. I guess I'm just confused because I'm not sure how to explain what happened... did we have sex although he wasn't in all the way and we didn't finish anything? I think we're both kinda wondering what exactly happened... and we're nervous to bring it up- its not the most confortable situation to discuss. He is "bigger" than most guys I've ever fooled around with so maybe that is why I bled although he didn't fully penetrate me? I just don't know.....

 
Old 11-30-2004, 06:16 PM   #4
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chevyman HB User
Re: GIRL- needing advice from you GUYS!!

hi,
Did he just put the tip inside you or the head? did he use a lube? condom? was you aroused enough?...the head part of a penis while erect is the biggest part in most cases... THATS WHAT A WOMAN HAS A HARD TIME WITH THE ENTERING PHASE... after that it's all pump and go a green light sort of !! ... he probably just gave you a slight tear as your vagina walls started to spread?...that would bleed pretty bad enough to scare you....if you stop bleeding then thats probably what happen?...I would think that having a baby would not make any difference sinse the vagina will go back to it's regular size....sounds like you are small and have a tight vagina try streching it with kegal's excrise? or get a small toy or let him finger you..that may help get you ready for his big size? it's a good thing you guys had sense enough to stop my hats off to you guys for that.....Good Luck!

Last edited by chevyman; 11-30-2004 at 06:19 PM.

 
Old 11-30-2004, 07:50 PM   #5
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wildcat66 HB User
Re: GIRL- needing advice from you GUYS!!

Quote:
Originally Posted by LeeAnn7
We've been together over 2 months- but we've known each other since HS. It was not my period- he didn't even question that. I guess I'm just confused because I'm not sure how to explain what happened... did we have sex although he wasn't in all the way and we didn't finish anything? I think we're both kinda wondering what exactly happened... and we're nervous to bring it up- its not the most confortable situation to discuss. He is "bigger" than most guys I've ever fooled around with so maybe that is why I bled although he didn't fully penetrate me? I just don't know.....
Sorry but its impossible for us to give you answers when it sounds like you are not even sure what he did to you. If his penis was in you it was intercourse, no ifs ands or buts.

 
Old 12-01-2004, 09:22 AM   #6
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LeeAnn7 HB User
Re: GIRL- needing advice from you GUYS!!

Thanks for all the advice. Let me explain in a little more detail and then maybe it will make more sense. Ok- I started BC about three weeks ago- so we've been "fooling around" but we were trying to wait to have intercourse until I finished the first full month of pills. Lately we have been really close- (he has been just kinda rubbing it with his penis while we're fooling around- but never penetrating at all... sorry to be so graphic but there's no other way to explain it..) Well things got crazy and we both pushed a little at the same time and it caused him to go a little inside me- enough for me to bleed. When we realized that- we stopped right away and I finished him manually. I would not consider this actual sex- because sex to me is full penetration. The point is that I'm just nervous about the next time we're in that situation because I don't want to stop next time. Are guys weirded out by inexperienced girls? I know I'm worrying myself too much and I should just go with the flow- but I guess I'm just thinking about how much this is going to change our relationship and I want everything to go right. Thanks for listening... guys have no idea how much sex means to a girl and how much we worry about it at first... Or maybe thats just me! LOL

 
Old 12-01-2004, 10:08 AM   #7
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chevyman HB User
Re: GIRL- needing advice from you GUYS!!

hi, just be thankful you have a caring and understand guy!

usally first timers are nervous at the beginning and it does play a big part in the sexual arousal.....if you guys go ahead and do it make sure he's uses a condom a lubercaited one....keep tissiues towls ect,ect,, by the bed or wherever you guys do it...you will probably bleed...even if he takes it slow and gentil.... you will probably bleed the first 4 or 5 times you guys do it...until you get use to it...you might even go back to your Doctor and have your BC recheck if thats all possible?
After you get use to his size and you stop the bleeding/spotting ect,ect,, and the passion starts to really sink in the love and feel of two people /man and woman being intimate is a wonderful wonderful thing.

As far as you fooling around....remember you don't have to be penatrated to become pregnant...a virgin can stay a virgin and still have a baby! thank bout that!..no pun intended!
Good Luck.

Last edited by chevyman; 12-01-2004 at 10:17 AM.

 
Old 12-01-2004, 10:19 AM   #8
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wildcat66 HB User
Re: GIRL- needing advice from you GUYS!!

It doesnt matter if he puts it in 1/8 of an inch or 6 inches it is still sex! I dont see how you could have bled if he didnt put it in enough to penetrate.

 
Old 12-01-2004, 10:28 PM   #9
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something_witty HB User
Re: GIRL- needing advice from you GUYS!!

I don't think she's asking if it's sex or not, and I don't think she wants to discuss a technical definition of it...

But LeeAnn, you should know that even if he doesn't ejaculate inside you, there's still a chance that some sperm could get in there from his precome. So be careful!

 
Old 12-02-2004, 09:39 AM   #10
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TomsWife HB User
Re: GIRL- needing advice from you GUYS!!

Quote:
Originally Posted by LeeAnn7
We've been together over 2 months- but we've known each other since HS. It was not my period- he didn't even question that. I guess I'm just confused because I'm not sure how to explain what happened... did we have sex although he wasn't in all the way and we didn't finish anything? I think we're both kinda wondering what exactly happened... and we're nervous to bring it up- its not the most confortable situation to discuss. He is "bigger" than most guys I've ever fooled around with so maybe that is why I bled although he didn't fully penetrate me? I just don't know.....
I dont understand. You feel comfortable about having sex with him but dont feel comfortable about discussing it? How old are you both?
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Old 12-02-2004, 09:48 AM   #11
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Join Date: May 2003
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TomsWife HB User
Re: GIRL- needing advice from you GUYS!!

Quote:
Originally Posted by chevyman
hi, just be thankful you have a caring and understand guy!

usally first timers are nervous at the beginning and it does play a big part in the sexual arousal.....if you guys go ahead and do it make sure he's uses a condom a lubercaited one....keep tissiues towls ect,ect,, by the bed or wherever you guys do it...you will probably bleed...even if he takes it slow and gentil.... you will probably bleed the first 4 or 5 times you guys do it...until you get use to it...you might even go back to your Doctor and have your BC recheck if thats all possible?
After you get use to his size and you stop the bleeding/spotting ect,ect,, and the passion starts to really sink in the love and feel of two people /man and woman being intimate is a wonderful wonderful thing.

As far as you fooling around....remember you don't have to be penatrated to become pregnant...a virgin can stay a virgin and still have a baby! thank bout that!..no pun intended!
Good Luck.
Huh? Probably bleed the first 4 - 5 times? If your screen name reflects your gender, I wonder about some of your responses. Every woman is different and a man (or woman for that matter) cant predict what will happen.
At any rate, I am not getting into the debate about whether or not she had sex although I do have my own opinion on that.
Leeann, You may have had some break through bleeding from your birth control pills. It used to happen to me. If your still concerned a trip or call to your GYN may be in order.
__________________
Never be afraid to try something new.
Remember that a lone amateur built the Ark.
A large group of professionals built the Titanic

 
Old 12-03-2004, 12:47 PM   #12
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LeeAnn7 HB User
Re: GIRL- needing advice from you GUYS!!

Wow- I thought this was a place where you could come and ask questions and discuss uncertanties- but I guess I was wrong. Some people have given advice and support, while others have made me feel stupid- thanks... I'm 23 as I stated before- but age is not really a factor at this point. Inexperience is... so yes- I'm still getting comfortable discussing intimate things with my boyfriend. It was awkward to bring up- because it was something that caught us both by surprise. I'm not going to justify my situation to others as far as the debate on whether I had "sex" or not... The point is that I'm basically doing all this for the first time and I'm just nervous and unsure. Thanks to everyone who offered me substantial advice/ experience.

 
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