It appears you have not yet Signed Up with our community. To Sign Up for free, please click here....

Sexual Health - Men Message Board

am i gay?

Post New Thread   Closed Thread
LinkBack Thread Tools Search this Thread
Old 01-04-2005, 12:32 PM   #1
Join Date: Dec 2004
Posts: 3
Robert4170 HB User
Exclamation am i gay?

i got a couple questions. First of all, i am confused on my sexuality. well, i am a guy and sometimes to get me 'excited' i look at naked men on the internet or heterosexual sex, but NEVER gay porn. it just disgusts me. i would also NEVER have sex with a guy, but i if a guy takes off his shirt i like to 'admire' him. i like to think that i do this because, well, im not the fittest and i like to look at guys with fit bodies so i have a goal to work toward (ive started working out). In school, i check out girls, have prom dates, but no lasting relationships. i was wondering if this fits me under homosexual, bisexual, or heterosexual?

Sponsors Lightbulb
Old 01-04-2005, 01:08 PM   #2
Join Date: Dec 2004
Posts: 349
pcantona HB User
Re: am i gay?

It sounds like you are bi-sexual. A 100% straight man thinks another man is as physically interesting as a cabbage. But yet you dont like gay porn or sex.
A gay man wont find a girl interesting at all or like some male gay friend of my girlfriends says, he finds naked women gross and disgusting or even if a woman stands to close to him, he gets disgusted. Which is a normal reaction for a gay man. You find both sexes "interesting" in some way, so you are probably bi-sexual. Just because you are bi-sexual doesnt mean that you like sex with men.

Old 01-04-2005, 01:49 PM   #3
Junior Member
Join Date: Dec 2004
Location: Ohio
Posts: 30
Earth&Fire HB User
Re: am i gay?

Actually, I don't think you are gay or bi, just an aesthetic. Naturists spend their time in mixed company and, from what I gather, are seldom disgusted by the sight of either gender.

Old 01-04-2005, 02:37 PM   #4
Senior Member
Join Date: Jun 2004
Posts: 141
aefef HB User
I don't think you are gay or bisexual. I mean, to admire sometimes someone you see because he has a better body doesn't make you bisexual. To be bisexual would be if you are really attracted in the same way by men an women (if you feel that a man is handsome and you see him like he attracts you sexually like a woman attracts you). So, don't worry, i don't think you are bi.

Last edited by Mod-S4; 01-04-2005 at 11:44 PM. Reason: Question for the moderators? Email it, don't make comments on the boards.

Old 01-04-2005, 03:56 PM   #5
Senior Member
Join Date: Dec 2004
Posts: 140
JuiciCouture HB User
Re: am i gay?

I really wouldnt worry about it. Its actually a psychological thing that happens to people more often than you think. You see people who look a certain way, that you want to look like, or just plain think looks nice.. And you pull qualities from them that you dont have subconciously. Its definately normal to find members of the same sex attractive. It doesnt mean it is SEXUALLY attractive. I find women to be absolutely beautiful, sometimes more so than guys.. But I wouldnt date a woman, yet I definately have a "type". Also, a guy friend of mine who is into body building.. always tells me that he talks to guys, admires their bodies..but knows he wouldnt want to engage in anything with these guys.
So.. Chalk it up to a mind game. Just because you havent had a real lasting relationship with a woman by your standards..has nothing to do with it. One problem has nothing to do with the other. If you look at a man, and automatically think of him in a sexual way.. You are gay/bi. If you look at a man and think he looks great, is dressed well..whatever.. and it ends there. You are straight.

Old 01-04-2005, 04:45 PM   #6
Junior Member
Join Date: Jan 2003
Posts: 22
Re: am i gay?

I do not think you are are gay or bi. I don't think you can call someone bi unless they plan to act on it. Maybe the fact that you like looking at naked men makes it a little bit likely to accidentally happen one day (especially at your age) but unlikely. I also want to point out that you are still in your teen years. It is not uncommon for boys to be curious about other boys at that age. OR to say at that age that having short relationships is uncommon. Some people like to be single. I am 33, hetero, and still single but not lonely either It will take a special girl to settle me down. I am not going to get married just to have a wedding or just so I can have kids or to keep up with my brother or god knows the stupid, foolish reasons people get married.

Also, if you look on this site or do a google search you will find plenty or men (especially married men) who fantasize about having sex with other men and even look at gay porn but never act on it nor have any desire to act on it. Its just fantasy. So unless it is getting in the way of your normal sexual functions I would not worry about it.

IMO, you are normal. From the sounds of things, you may have a small interest/curiosity about other men but if you were ever put in the position to act on it you likely wouldn't. The reality would not match the fantasy.

Old 01-04-2005, 07:17 PM   #7
Senior Veteran
Join Date: Jan 2003
Location: Boston, MA
Posts: 5,220
tommy124 HB Usertommy124 HB Usertommy124 HB Usertommy124 HB Usertommy124 HB User
Re: am i gay?

I check out guys the same way you do. It's normal. You measure yourself against how they look. Men do that. They're the competition.
I'm married, and have three kids. I don't have sex with anyone but my wife.

Old 01-04-2005, 07:55 PM   #8
Senior Member
Join Date: Dec 2004
Posts: 206
SomeRandomDude HB User
Re: am i gay?

Sexuality is not always black and white...

You will soon enough find out where you stand.

I for one am straight for the most part.. but will admit to having a very 'bi curious' side to me.

Old 01-04-2005, 08:01 PM   #9
Junior Member
Join Date: Dec 2004
Location: Ohio
Posts: 30
Earth&Fire HB User
Re: am i gay?

If you need convincing that the whole world admires the human body - male or female- spend a little time in a good art museum and look at what the human race has found attractive (not sexual) for centuries. If you find the male bodies "disgusting", then you might begin to wonder if you are, in fact, gay.

Old 01-07-2005, 07:01 AM   #10
Join Date: Jul 2004
Posts: 86
skadoo101 HB User
Re: am i gay?

Not only do guys check out other guys upper bodies, but have you seen what goes on in the locker rooms or at urinals. A lot of us "sneak a peek." We're curious about others bodies and, like another poster said, people are very competitive, whether they know it or not. So, we check out the competition and wonder if we stack up.

Old 01-07-2005, 08:35 AM   #11
Join Date: Apr 2004
Posts: 9
vigorstrength HB User
Re: am i gay?

Every man is curious, in my opinion. Most just avoid admitting it.

It sounds like you believe you have a split in the road. Straight or Gay... It's really your choice, but believe me, being straight is a lot easier.

Masculinity found in stories, myths, books, movies is a lifetime achievement. They're progressive habits and traits. People are wrong when they assume they are instantly born with masculinity, IMO.

Old 01-07-2005, 09:46 AM   #12
Join Date: Dec 2004
Posts: 349
pcantona HB User
Re: am i gay?

To comment more on what is written in this thread. You pretty much got it, except for some clarifications. No "acting" or "not acting" on something doesnt make you straight or gay. There are men that has been married for 10 years with normal sex lives that are bisexual. Just because you only have sex with women by choice, doesnt make you straight. Many times these men know that being gay or bi-sexual is something "dirty" so they do not act on it, in fact I think these men hate the fact that they are not 100% normal by social standards and try to hold it back. Some of these men may or may no come out of the closet at a later date. What makes you straight, gay or bi-sexual is what "appeals" to you. If you only admire women and are not checking out men, other than for analytical reasons or to compare yourself to, then you are straight.

Old 01-07-2005, 12:03 PM   #13
Join Date: May 2004
Location: australia
Posts: 58
Russianman HB User
Re: am i gay?

iam straight, but if i look at porn i would rather see look at porn with a guy and a chick eg hardcore. two lesbians are also good to look at , but i get more aroused when i see a male and a female. but i dontlook at gay porn.

and i also look at othe guys bodies on beach etc just to compare muscles , etc.

Old 01-08-2005, 07:32 PM   #14
Senior Member
Join Date: Oct 2004
Posts: 123
opiateskill000 HB User
Re: am i gay?

I was told in a psychology course that there is no such thing as a completely gay or straight person. I was told (and I can't verify this) that it is on a spectrum, meaning you're either more straight than gay, or more gay than straight, or equal in both regards (I guess that would be a bisexual). I personally understand how you can admire a strong body, but I would just get jealous and self-concious rather than sexually stimulated in any way!

Old 01-08-2005, 08:32 PM   #15
Join Date: Oct 2004
Posts: 43
desired1 HB User
Re: am i gay?

[QUOTE=Robert4170]i got a couple questions. First of all, i am confused on my sexuality. well, i am a guy and sometimes to get me 'excited' i look at naked men

REPLYING TO THIS SENTENCE ; I think if you've never acted out with a guy you can't call this bi or gay I think the best terminology for your question is curiosity, because some people start out being fully attracted to both sexes and end up with the one they think fits them better, I know because my co- worker is gay and she is very open with her sexuality and she basically tells it all.

Last edited by desired1; 01-08-2005 at 08:34 PM.

Closed Thread

Similar Threads
Thread Thread Starter Board Replies Last Post
Retin-a-micro success stories.... Dom Acne 2 01-18-2003 07:06 AM
Rules of the Board - please read moderator2 Acne 0 06-10-2002 08:06 PM
If you feel suicidal, please read here.... moderator2 Acne 0 05-29-2002 06:54 PM
All members..... moderator2 Acne 2 05-16-2002 08:18 PM
How to use this message board.... moderator2 Acne 0 04-17-2002 07:33 PM

Thread Tools Search this Thread
Search this Thread:

Advanced Search

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is Off
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are Off
Pingbacks are Off
Refbacks are Off

Sign Up Today!

Ask our community of thousands of members your health questions, and learn from others experiences. Join the conversation!

I want my free account

All times are GMT -7. The time now is 09:18 PM.

Site owned and operated by HealthBoards.comô
Terms of Use © 1998-2016 HealthBoards.comô All rights reserved.
Do not copy or redistribute in any form!