Girlfriend and blowjobs.. - Sexual Health - Men Message Board

dingobiatch · 09-05-2006, 12:34 AM

First, I know this topic is very cliche and has probably been beaten to death here, but I need advice.

My girlfriend and I have been together for almost 3 years now. My only problem with our sex life is how she finishes oral sex.
About a year and a half, she was alright with letting me finish in her mouth. She didn't like it, but she wanted to please me. She would just run off and spit into the bathroom sink, wash her mouth out. That kind of thing.
Fast forward to now.
She will not let me finish in her mouth at all. She says its not really the taste that kills her, its the smell - she says it smells like "bleach". I know I should be happy, and understand if she doesn't like it. The thing that bothers me is that she used to. Which to me, only translates to: she now doesn't think its necessary to put as much effort into it.
This really bothers me because I do anything to please her. Anything. I don't care what's wrong with her, she can smell down below, have a yeast infection, be on a period (well, very light period - she feels uncomfortable at anything more). I'll still please her whenever she wants.

Is it wrong for me to be upset over this? I know I should respect how she feels, and if she doesn't like it, she shouldn't have to do it. But the thing is, I know its really not that bad - she used to be fine with it. Hell, I've tasted my own sperm and it doesn't even make me flinch. Kinda neutral.

Advice?

Angel77 · 09-05-2006, 02:51 AM

I think this is a case of she did it as long as she could muster and now she just can't manage to do it any more. Think about it, if it's really that bad for her, she'll end up yakking...definitely a mood killer. I have tried for my husband and I just can't do it. Once you get to the point where you have become nauseated by it, it's impossible to keep doing it.

I can tell you a friend of mine owns an adult novelty store and told me that she has found that more men are comfortable w/ the taste of ejaculate (theirs or someone elses...tim..I know) that are most women.

It has been proven that womens tastebuds are a bit different than mens. I can't remember the basics of it, but that would explain why it's so different to her. I can also tell you that IMO ejaculate has a very strong smell...and thinking about it as I post this is enough to make me feel queesy...sorry.

I don't know whether to pat you on the back for being such a trooper, but anything less than fresh on my end, I won't let my husband touch me with someone elses 10' pole!!

Good luck and try not to take it personally...it likely has more to do with she tried as long as she could rather than she just doesn't care to indulge in it any more.

JustDave4now · 09-06-2006, 05:04 PM

I remember a post of a man who is married to a woman whom he will not have oral sex with, when she inquired he told her he just couldn't stand the taste, he found it revolting though he loved her very much, yet her very smell of her fluids enough to turn him off.

She was crushed..

Options were given from many showers to using some kind of soap or colone. but the feelings were that he was being a cad and thoughtless because she could only reach her climax in this fashion. Many people could really feel for her, she said she became very subconsious of being naked and exposed with her husband.

It swings both ways, but in one case the man is being a cad because he finds her taste offensive and in another a cad for taking offense that she finds his taste offensive.

Go figure... such is life..

hi5 · 09-11-2006, 02:16 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by JustDave4now

I remember a post of a man who is married to a woman whom he will not have oral sex with, when she inquired he told her he just couldn't stand the taste, he found it revolting though he loved her very much, yet her very smell of her fluids enough to turn him off.

She was crushed..

Options were given from many showers to using some kind of soap or colone. but the feelings were that he was being a cad and thoughtless because she could only reach her climax in this fashion. Many people could really feel for her, she said she became very subconsious of being naked and exposed with her husband.

It swings both ways, but in one case the man is being a cad because he finds her taste offensive and in another a cad for taking offense that she finds his taste offensive.

Go figure... such is life..

With oral sex, a double standard usually exists. Women want men to "understand" that there's a certain taste, smell, etc. that might keep them from "finishing the job," but if you bring it up that women also have a certain taste, smell, etc., you will sometimes see responses that it's "just different" - meaning, the situation is different, the texture is different, the smell is different, and that men have no excuse for not doing oral due to a woman's smell.

I have found that my new woman will sometimes swallow, sometimes not. I only had 1 "rule" with her, and that was to let me finish the same way she would like to finish (do unto others as you would have them do unto you). That means I did NOT tell her she had to swallow, but that I wanted to finish in her mouth. Told her if she prefers to switch to hand at the last moment, I will only offer her the same. It was never an arguement with us, either. She actually understood my point.

namehere2 · 09-12-2006, 10:31 AM

I personally don't frequently like to swallow, but I do it on occasion. My husband has never asked/begged or expressed his preference. He enjoys it either way. The first time I finished it orally he seemed surprised and enjoyed emmensley, now I occasionally do this, just to spice it up every once in awhile.
Just a suggestion here, maybe leave things where they lie and she may surprise you. She did it before to please you! The mood/moment may arise again. Monotony is no fun!! And it's not fun/enjoyable when you're being asked or when the topic is dead. It may never happen again, but don't guilt her into it or make her feel obligated. Let her actions be on her own terms.
There's my suggestion...it may help or it maynot. I wish you best though!!