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Old 10-08-2007, 11:42 AM   #1
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Average Age of Sexual Decline

Does anyone know the average age when a man's erections are only semi-rigid? My husband started developing this problem at 63. I've read that some men in their 80's have sex. Is 63 to be considered as "over-the-hill" for good?

 
Old 10-08-2007, 01:20 PM   #2
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yahu HB User
Re: Average Age of Sexual Decline

Quote:
Originally Posted by Piano0105 View Post
Does anyone know the average age when a man's erections are only semi-rigid? My husband started developing this problem at 63. I've read that some men in their 80's have sex. Is 63 to be considered as "over-the-hill" for good?
Contrary to popular myth, there is no ""over-the-hill for good" age for males. While there are well documented changes that occur with age, the vast majority of male erection problems- regardless of age- trace to either non-sexual health problems, medicine side effects, relationship problems, or being out of shape physically. There are plenty of 63 year old males with firm erections, and sadly- plenty of 40 year old males with soft erections. There are so many factors that aren't age related, it is impossible to define an endpoint. Thank goodness, as I'm rapidly approaching 63 myself

 
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Old 10-08-2007, 05:10 PM   #3
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Re: Average Age of Sexual Decline

For me the most noticed factor is the decline in frequency, not of the interest or erections, but the ability keep a good one and to ejaculate. Once a week is what i can expect now, also age 63. If i try more than once a week, use viagra and get a good erection the work it takes to ejaculate is long and troublesome, ending sometimes in masturbation. Of course like most guys i can remember my days of age 20 when 2 or 3 times a day was OK. Now it just 'ain't that way'. Am in good physical condition, no smoke or drink. Normal, i guess. No guy 63 can run with the boys of 20 very far. I presume by age 80 maybe 2x per month, maybe that is generous. I hope to be alive.

 
Old 10-10-2007, 03:44 AM   #4
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Re: Average Age of Sexual Decline

As stated in the other posts, there is no specific age at which erections begin to decline, but certainly by age 63 most men are having some difficulty with reduced erections at times. Have your husband use viagra to add the boost he needs to get a firm erection. He should be good to go for several more years yet.

 
Old 10-11-2007, 11:20 AM   #5
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Re: Average Age of Sexual Decline

Sadly, my husband had been using Viagra successfully for two years before it suddenly became ineffective. He has since tried Levitra, Cialis, the pump, and injections. None of these has worked. He's in good health, not too much alcohol, doesn't smoke, etc. This problem has been going on for a year now. He sees a urologist regularly but nothing works so far. Prior to Viagra quitting on him everything was excellent.

 
Old 10-11-2007, 12:12 PM   #6
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Re: Average Age of Sexual Decline

Sorry to hear that viagra and other such pills now are not working for your husband. If I were him I would first of all get a good overall physical, then see a urologist. Perhaps there is some underlying problem.
The second thing I would suspect is that this might be a psychological problem. This is quite common. If so, there are some steps he can take to overcome that, without seeing a doctor. I would be glad to share those with you, should you want.
The last thing I want to cover is this. You do say that he is in good health, but run down this checklist quickly to see if he is doing the following:
1. Does he exercise rigorously on a regular basis? This is so important and will affect his sexual health.
2. Does he eat right--that is, does he eat healthy amounts of vegetables and fruits, and not fill his stomach with junk foods, full of sugars and carbs and fats.
3 Is he under undo stress? Stress will really zap the ability to achieve erections
4. Is he overweight? This is a major contributor to sexual dysfunction, and a host of other health problems.

 
Old 10-12-2007, 11:34 AM   #7
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Re: Average Age of Sexual Decline

Lorelle,

Thanks for your response. Yes, he does exercise regularly, eats well, is not overweight, etc. He has seen two urologists who've ruled out any underlying conditions.

What are the tips for the pyschological aspect of the problem? It can't be all psychological since he says that even his night-time erections are only semi-hard.

 
Old 10-12-2007, 08:34 PM   #8
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Re: Average Age of Sexual Decline

Quote:
Originally Posted by Piano0105 View Post
Lorelle,

Thanks for your response. Yes, he does exercise regularly, eats well, is not overweight, etc. He has seen two urologists who've ruled out any underlying conditions.

What are the tips for the pyschological aspect of the problem? It can't be all psychological since he says that even his night-time erections are only semi-hard.
You were not specific as to any tests the urologists did. Do you know if they have tested his testosterone and all other hormone levels? If not, we have some threads over in the more general "Men's Health" thread that may be helpful. You may need to consult an endo that specializes in Andropause in order to receive a total hormone workup.

 
Old 10-12-2007, 08:37 PM   #9
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Re: Average Age of Sexual Decline

Quote:
Originally Posted by jobin View Post
For me the most noticed factor is the decline in frequency, not of the interest or erections, but the ability keep a good one and to ejaculate. Once a week is what i can expect now, also age 63. If i try more than once a week, use viagra and get a good erection the work it takes to ejaculate is long and troublesome, ending sometimes in masturbation. Of course like most guys i can remember my days of age 20 when 2 or 3 times a day was OK. Now it just 'ain't that way'. Am in good physical condition, no smoke or drink. Normal, i guess. No guy 63 can run with the boys of 20 very far. I presume by age 80 maybe 2x per month, maybe that is generous. I hope to be alive.
Jobin, consider switching from Viagra to Cialis. It does not retard ejaculation as much. You will also find that you are "up for it" for 3 days.

Last edited by AZMan07; 10-12-2007 at 08:38 PM.

 
Old 10-14-2007, 09:07 AM   #10
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Re: Average Age of Sexual Decline

First of all let me say that seim-hard erections at night are normal for someone you husband's age. In fact, it is just good that he is having any nocturnal erections at all at age 63. This is probably nothing to worry about.

Now, concerning the psychological aspects of ED. You know it has been said that having an erection is all a matter of the mind, and there is alot of truth in that. Not being able to perform a time or two in a row is devastating for a man, and this problem feeds on itself. Once it happens, as it will to almost all men at some time, the next time performance is called for, the man becomes stressed and worries if he will be able to get it up for that time, and that worry alone is enough to cause the next bout of ED. If failure to get an erection occurs again, the problem only grows.
This vicious cycle has to be broken. One way to help break the cycle is to take the pressure-to-perform off your husband. This will require some patience and a little technique.
First, reassure him that you understand and empathize with his problem and want to help. Then the next few love-making sessions you both agree to back off the sex act itself. Concentrate instead on caressing, kissing, etc. instead of the sex act. This takes pressure off him. Hey, he now knows he does not HAVE to perform, and, oddly enough, that will help him perform later on. If you continue doing this a few times, he will likely become more and more aroused to the point where he will want to complete the sex act--but--and this is so important--let him initiate the move to have sex. It is also important that he not be tired or stressed, not have consumed alcohol in the hours just before this, and is not taking any medications that interfere with erections. Let him choose the time. Agree between yourselves that it is okay to not go to orgasm or to complete the sex act every time you have sex. It is okay to just cuddle, carress, and touch, if you so feel like it. In other words love-making does not necessarily have to end with the sex act. It is okay to stop short of that. That way you both are free to stop short of having sex, should circumstances require it and nobody feels like a failure. And he is going to feel much less pressure to perform, believe me. If psychological problems are what's haunting him, then this should go a long way toward correcting the problem. Give it time. It won't likely happen with just one session.

 
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