lack of sex drive - Sexual Health - Men Message Board

jigsaw · 10-07-2003, 11:06 AM

can anyone help.im 41 and ive lost my sex drive,ive lost the feeling of being randy and the urge to get horny.i have had all my blood levels checked,they say im normal.i can get hard but the feelings not the same.please help

serenityelf · 10-07-2003, 11:34 AM

Hi,
That happened to my first husband at around 35. He also had everything checked and it tested okay. His doctor put him on anti-drepressants for a low chronic depression. He's still on them today. Are you married? If you are I could offer you some suggestions: 1) If you want to stay married, keep actively trying to find a solution. Even if there isn't one, that'll make your wife feel a lot better. 2) Keep letting her know it is not her problem and that she is still attractive. She may also be going through Menopuase and it could really affect her. When this occurs, women take it personally, and it really affects their self-esteem. 3)If there is anything wrong in your marriage besides this, get a marriage counsellor. 4) Most important: My oncologist told me after my struggle with cancer regarding making love: "If you don't use it, you'll lose it." I suggest you keep making love to your wife (if you have one) because the longer you go between the harder it gets and the further you drift apart. In my first marriage when it went on for years, and he, like you could...but DIDN'T, I, too, lost my desire for him and ..basically if was over. Good luck!

jigsaw · 10-11-2003, 03:16 AM

i dont think im depressed.quite relaxed really.its just not there anymore.i want to feel randy again,and horny.is there anything i can take or do ,ive tried viagra it gets you hard,but i dont have a problem getting hard.i just want the urge and that feeling of getting horny.can anyone help please

Porto guy · 10-11-2003, 07:10 AM

So u have no problem geting hard...anhhh....u get hard even not been horn? Im not sure I know what u mean. U get hard but ur not aroused. When do u get hard? I mean, is it just in the nigth and morning, or u get hard seeing porn and everything?

...I understand if u feel a litle mad with my questions, but Im just trying to get it rigth... http://www.healthboards.com/ubb/confused.gif

[This message has been edited by Miguel Antunes (edited 10-11-2003).]

[This message has been edited by Miguel Antunes (edited 10-11-2003).]

[This message has been edited by Miguel Antunes (edited 10-11-2003).]

orion · 10-11-2003, 10:45 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by jigsaw:
can anyone help.im 41 and ive lost my sex drive,ive lost the feeling of being randy and the urge to get horny.i have had all my blood levels checked,they say im normal.i can get hard but the feelings not the same.please help

You say the tests were "normal" well what were the actual results. Testosterone for instance has a huge allowed range from say 300 to 1200. If you are normally a 900 man but your blood tested 300, the doctor would say you are normal when in fact you are way down for your normal.

Did you have a thyroid test? Did you have a test for prolactin? Do you have any other symptoms like weight gain, irritability, muscle loss, leg/join pain, memory problems or fatigue?