It appears you have not yet Signed Up with our community. To Sign Up for free, please click here....



Sexual Health - Men Message Board
Post New Thread   Closed Thread
LinkBack Thread Tools
Old 06-08-2001, 01:18 AM   #1
Newbie
 
Join Date: Jun 2001
Location: Black Jack, MO, US
Posts: 3
ChrisA HB User
Viagra didn't work. Extremely Distressed. Only 17

About a year ago I thought that I was in love with this girl. We were together for about a year when she told me she was pregnant. Because of our ages and after talking it over with both sets of parents we decided to have an abortion done. All in all the abortion really affected me and we never had sex again. I guess you can say that I was very shaken up by the fact that I killed my own seed. We had a very hard breakup about 2 months after we had the abortion done.

Well now it's about a year later and I've been with this PERFECT girl who I care for a whole lot. Now I am ready to have sex again. The first time we tried to have sex it was on my birthday. I was erect all during the foreplay but when it was time to enter her I lost my erection. Man was I embarrased. I explained to her my situation with my ex girlfriend, and she was just so understanding(keep in mind that she is only 16). She never mentioned anything about it and was so caring for me for the rest of the night when we went out. This really made me fall for her.

Well anyway, after a couple of repeated failed sexual encounters, I became extremely distressed. I even talked it over with my parents. My dad tried to explained to me that it was perfectly normal what I was going through and I should just try to relax. After I told him that I have been trying desperately to relax(even tried meditation) he offered me some of his viagra. Man was I happy. I just knew this stuff was going to work for me right? Wrong. 3 times have I tried having sex on viagra and 3 times have I been left alone crying myself to sleep. And tonight it happened again. I just don't know what to do. Right now I feel like just giving up on sex, but I feel like in doing so I will lose my current girlfriend. So this is my last resort. I desperately need you guy's help. What am I doing wrong? I just can't seem to overcome my nervousness. It's like that everytime I try to enter my girlfriend my heart starts POUNDING and I lose my erection. I can tell that this is starting to affect our relationship.

What am I doing wrong. I was told that taking viagra on a full stomach would reduce the affects so I take it after digestion. Could it be that I am working to hard? This last time we tried to have sex it was 4 hours after football practice. Was this a long enough time to let my body rejuvanate? Are there any alternatives that I should look into? Please guys I need some help, this is really tearing me up. I am way to young. I feel as if I am missing out on a big part of life and it is frustrated the hell out of me. Any suggestions/advice is needed and greatly appreciated.

 
Sponsors Lightbulb
   
Old 06-08-2001, 03:48 AM   #2
Senior Veteran
(male)
 
Join Date: Dec 2000
Posts: 2,640
Lance2 HB UserLance2 HB UserLance2 HB User
Re: Viagra didn't work. Extremely Distressed. Only 17

Wow, you really are facing alot at your age. It's also really great you can talk to your folks about problems with sex and erections. However, you are too young for Viagra and your dad probably shouldn't have given it to you as it is a prescription drug that has medical reasons to be prescribed. That said, let's look at what's happened here. First, you and an ex become pregnant and you both decide to abort....this DOES affect you and big time emotionally. That was your child and it is a loss. Now you're in another sexual relationship (or attempting to be) and your buddy won't perform. Our two "heads" are very much connected. Unfortunately, once we have an erection problem (and we all face them) we get really freaked out and try harder which only makes things worse. For guys our masculinity is tied to our penis (not quite sure why, but it is) so when it doesn't perform we somehow feel inadequate. I'd like to suggest that you stop with the Viagra and deal with some emotional stuff. Talk to a trusted adult or your parents about the abortion and what's happening now. You know that your friend works, he'll get up but won't stay up when it's time to enter. That sorta tells me you're afraid of pregnancy or something....that can cause problems, but it would be perfectly normal to be fearful after one prior abortion. Are you using protection? That too may help curb the fear a bit. Take your time and stop kicking yourself around, sounds like you're a healthy adolescent male, playing football and such. You might try getting lots of rest, setting up a romantic evening, skip masturbation for several days, and then focus on her. Try lot's of foreplay, maybe let her masturbate you and then give it a try. If it doesn't work, keep trying! Hopefully your girl will help you work through this, commmunication is key to sexuality for couples. But the main thing is to work with your head and stop convincing yourself that something is wrong with you....you'll be just fine, but there's alot of stuff up there to deal with. Hope some of this helps, write back for more support from the board!

 
Old 06-08-2001, 10:26 AM   #3
Junior Member
 
Join Date: Mar 2001
Posts: 28
katnattoo HB User
Re: Viagra didn't work. Extremely Distressed. Only 17

ChrisA: I would definitely go and see your doctor about this. I don't think Viagra is your answer. You need to forgive yourself for the abortion, it is in the past. I bet your doctor can help you out. Good luck!<p>[This message has been edited by moderator3 (edited 06-08-2001).]

 
Old 06-08-2001, 12:46 PM   #4
 
Join Date: Jan 2001
Location: Kansas
Posts: 0
Hamsmacker HB User
Re: Viagra didn't work. Extremely Distressed. Only 17

ChrisA,

I can certainly relate to what you are saying about not being able to perform. My husband and I have lost two kids from miscarriage. He has stated many times that he sometimes suffers from impotence because of the fear of getting me pregnant only to have our hearts broken yet again. I totally agree with Lance2 when he said to talk to a trusted friend or adult about the abortion and what is going on now. I sincerely believe that after talking about your feelings with someone can help you feel better. I won't lie to you and tell you that things will clear up over night, it will take some time. I hope that your girlfriend will stick with you during this difficult time in your life until you can become intimate with her the way that you want to be.

 
Old 06-08-2001, 01:33 PM   #5
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Dec 2000
Location: UK
Posts: 104
Roger100 HB User
Re: Viagra didn't work. Extremely Distressed. Only 17

(Anybody : How does one do the quotes?)
"What am I doing wrong. I was told that taking viagra on a full stomach would reduce the affects so I take it after digestion "

Take viagra on an empty stomach dissolved in some luke warm water. Wait 20-40 minutes.
Viagra will not work if you are very anxious. However if you stimulate yourself with your hands you should be able to get it up again. Use a condom and lubricration, then you don't have to worry about babies and AIDS. Don't use oil based lubricrants and be carful of vignal fluid and blood if you have cuts in your skin , lips, bleading gums or just after shaving your face or your pubic hairs.

 
Closed Thread

Similar Threads
Thread Thread Starter Board Replies Last Post
Viagra's diminishing effect Leo46 Sexual Dysfunction Treatment 25 02-22-2008 04:53 PM
Suddenly, viagra doesn't work! mariposa9 Sexual Health - Men 7 02-15-2007 11:16 AM
Cialas and Viagra. I seem to have problems with them? builder Sexual Dysfunction Treatment 3 12-20-2004 09:17 PM
Levitra vs Cialis vs Viagra JohnDoe2 Sexual Dysfunction Treatment 38 06-17-2004 06:16 AM
Viagra 100mg dose Pacman32746 Sexual Dysfunction Treatment 13 02-16-2004 02:02 PM




Thread Tools

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is Off
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are Off
Pingbacks are Off
Refbacks are Off




Join Our Newsletter

Stay healthy through tips curated by our health experts.

Whoops,

There was a problem adding your email Try again

Thank You

Your email has been added








TOP THANKED CONTRIBUTORS



Fles (14), mc7 (10), wachix (7), Bob652 (7), Vanilla Kiss (6), tommy124 (6), Mod-S4 (5), Just Tell Me (5), aowshea (5), solofelix (4)

Site Wide Totals

teteri66 (1180), MSJayhawk (1006), Apollo123 (906), Titchou (850), janewhite1 (823), Gabriel (759), ladybud (755), midwest1 (669), sammy64 (668), BlueSkies14 (607)



All times are GMT -7. The time now is 05:37 AM.



Site owned and operated by HealthBoards.comô
Terms of Use © 1998-2014 HealthBoards.comô All rights reserved.
Do not copy or redistribute in any form!