Hi, kinda need some advice from a male point of view here.
I have been seeing my boyfriend for 4 weeks now, and we started having sex after the first week or so. I'm 20 and he's almost 27. We have sex quite a lot, but he only manages to come inside me about 25% of the time. He says it's not my fault, that it's him, but somehow i still feel like a failure. Any other guys experience this??? What can i do to help him come more easily???
Yeah it happens sometimes. Sometimes I just don't get enough sensation to make me ***, especially with a condom on. So sometimes I have to finish up with my hand.
If he is wearing a condom, he might try putting a drop of lube on his penis before he puts the condom on.
I agree with college_dude
what about a different kind of condom, I use trojan lubed, they are in the light colored blue/green pack
AND they are thinner than most others so the sensations are that much better.
Or you could help your b/f finish by hand - sought of
"after-play" for him.
Ok I might be way out on a limb here. My roommate was having a hard time ******* with his girlfriend. He said it was because she wasn't tight enough, and there wasn't enough friction. So I talked to his gf (which is also my best friend) about kegel exercises. She had never done them before. It's basically flexing the vaginal muscles. Well she started doing them, and then when her and her boyfriend were having sex she would flex her muscles... basically trapping him in her. They haven't had the problem of him not climaxing in her since. Well it worked for them. Maybe it will work for you. Kegels are easy to do, but you need to do them daily. Here is the definition of a kegel exercise.....
Kegel's exercises
A set of exercises designed to strengthen and give voluntary control over the muscles surrounding the genitals (known as the pubococcygeus muscles) and thereby increase sexual pleasure and awareness.
These muscles are attached to the pelvic bone and act like a hammock, holding in your pelvic organs. To try and isolate these muscles trying stopping and starting the flow of urine.
Once you have located the muscles simply tighten and relax the mucsle over and over, about 200 times a day. These are basic kegels. There are many variations on kegels: elevator kegels (Where you tighten slowly, in increments going in and out, like an elevator stopping on several floors.), you can hold the muscle tightened for five seconds, you can bulge the muscles out at the end, and many other variations.
Hi, thanks again for the advice. But that is definately not the problem. My boyfriend says i am incredibly tight!! But thanks for trying anyway <IMG SRC="http://www.healthboards.com/ubb/redface.gif">)
Curious: how DOES he come the other 75% of the time?
If it's by manual or oral stimulation, we not do those things BEFORE insertion, so he's very aroused?
Also, don't rush. Make it last. Assure him he doesn't have to come quickly, let him soften up, then harden again, then soften, or whatever, without the pressure to ejaculate. A 27-yr-old guy, if his sexual function is OK, should go nuts!
