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Old 02-02-2002, 02:49 PM   #1
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Join Date: Jan 2001
Location: Vacaville, CA, USA
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seandogg01 HB User
i can't *** during sex

i always hear about guys mad because they *** to soon and everything....well i'm exactly opposite. i can't ***. i can't *** during sex, blowjobs, handjobs, anything. i've only ****** when i've masturbated. i'm 17 and have had sex 3 times. i like don't even come close to *******. i really hate it. i think it's nerves and self-concsiousness and not relaxing but i don't know how i CAN relax and not be nervous. how can you not be nervous when you have this problem. it really sucks. i need help badly.

 
Old 02-02-2002, 05:13 PM   #2
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foosballfan HB User
Re: i can't *** during sex

I had the SAME problem , it took a long time but I finally got over it and can sort of control how long I go, but not very well. I would go anf go and go for 45 minutes , an hour...She'd be all sore and dry and I'd have to quit and be frustrated. You just gotta stop if she gets too dry and wait a while and go back at it till it happens. That, and lay off the jacking if you do it much. I feel your pain, man.

 
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Old 02-02-2002, 11:52 PM   #3
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Tman77 HB User
Re: i can't *** during sex

Hi, Sean.
I have this problem a lot, too. I think like you said it's because we just get a little nervous, and the more you worry about not being able to ***, the more nervous you get. As long as you can pleasure her, the more you realize that women understand that the guy won't always ***, the more relaxed you'll get. And if you know in advance that you might end up in a situation where you might be having sex, don't masturbate. That'll keep you hornier, and the hornier you are, the easier it'll be to ***.
Good luck, and let us know how your next experience goes.

 
Old 02-03-2002, 05:17 AM   #4
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Lance2 HB UserLance2 HB UserLance2 HB User
Re: i can't *** during sex

Hey bud, welcome! There are a couple of things going on here. First, your two heads are very connnected, and once something like this happens you get all nervous and frustrated and even scared and that just makes things worse. You know that your penis works and you can *** by masturbation so, stop worrying about the fact that it isn't working right now. Second, through masturbation we "train" our penis to respond only to certain stimulation. No matter how hard we try, we cannot create the same stimulation of a vagina or mouth or whatever. Your penis is accustomed to your grip, speed, technique and all of that, so you've got to "re-train" it to respond to a vagina and such. This may take some time but will certainly take patience. I'd suggest that you start by totally changing the way you masturbate using little grip and different lubrications. Stop masturbating in any way that you've done it before. Then, totally change the amount of masturbation you do by decreasing the times etc. Then make some decision as to when you want to try having intercourse again and stop completely about 3 - 5 days before. Be sure that you're ready for another try and focus only on pleasing her, don't worry about yourself, your penis or your orgasm. Let go and just have fun, enjoy the pleasure. If you don't *** but are able to have intercourse, then fine.....ask her to finish you off by allowing HER to masturbate you. If this is a relationship....talk about what is going on....one thing that is important to sex is communication between the partners. You're in this together, let each other know what works and doesn't. But cut yourself some slack. What you're experiencing is common for many of us, something we've all been through from time to time. No reason to be embarassed about it at all. Hope this helps, we can "talk" again if you need to!

 
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