I am having trouble lasting long enough. I have been with my fiancee for a year and a half..and ...it seems as though I cannot last long enough for her, and she is getting very upset. She tells me to last longer. I wish it were that easy. Please give me some tips...because it's starting to affect our relationship...
Slow down bud, we've all been there and done this and from time to time all guys struggle trying to make it last longer. A couple of things may help. Increase the amount of foreplay and be sure she gets what she needs before you focus on yourself....it takes alot of work to be able to achieve orgasms at the same time and many of us never get there. One of the biggest helps is open, honest and very specific communication. This doesn't mean things like, "you need to last longer" because that puts it all on you to fix it....she needs to have a role here also. Another thing that may help slow you down is to masturbate to orgasm before intercourse, or have her dow that to you as part of foreplay....this may slow down your susbsequent ejaculation. Also there are other things, like Kegel exercises so you can better control the ejaculation process, creams or ointments that desensitize the head of your penis, condoms sometimes help in slowing us down, her on top so she controls pace etc may also help. But please don't let this effect you, you're not alone here and just some simple things may help you last longer. The worst thing that can happen to us is to have our "big head" effect the little one....our two heads are VERY much connected and any little bit of problem can have a drastic impact on performance. I'd suggest you do some internet research on premature ejaculation and see if there are other tips that may help! Others may also be able to provide some tips!
well, yes forplay will help you "last" longer, and you can learn to pleasure your partner more, intercourse is not the only thing, try some new positions, and play with her more and YES hold and hug her. if you are both more in touch with her iner feelings the actual intercouse act will seem longer because you will be doing things together a lot longer (time wise)
after 28 years of marriage of sex life is better than ever!
I completely agree with Lance2. Focus on her before you focus on yourself. I personally don't like to go before my girlfriend does. I work that as one of my goals in my sex life. Here are some tips on what you should try and do:
1. Focus on her - Hold her, rub her, kiss her up and down. Use your tounge, fingers, your penis etc.
2. If you feel yourself getting close to the point of no return...slow down...stop...change positions...unwind a bit.
3. Start of slowly, don't go jack hammer style right from the get go.
4. Try using sexual aids. Personally, I love these things for my girlfriend. I spend plenty of hours researching for anything that can to help enrich our sex life. Just don't be afraid to use them on her.
Good luck, I wish you the best.
<p>[This message has been edited by yarbles (edited 02-22-2002).]