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Old 08-12-2001, 10:09 PM   #1
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lung7793 HB User
sexuality question

I am a 19/m and a virgin. I am attracted to girls.
I am a fan of the HBO series Six Feet Under, and tonight on it a gay character was brought to a strip club by some new found friends (who didn't know he was gay). The friends wanted to show him a good time by sending a stripper to him for a lap dance, and when she performed it he wasn't getting turned on. It's kind of hard to explain, but I don't think i would be turned on either. I'm not a guy who gets turned on by just any girl who gets naked and performs a lap dance. I am much more turned on by people who I know and trust. But then most guys I know would be rock hard if this happened to them. I just wanted to get some opinions of whether this sounds gay, or is it just that I am very sensitive toward who I am turned on by. thanks alot

 
Old 08-12-2001, 10:36 PM   #2
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gwle HB User
Re: sexuality question

Nah, you're not gay! For most people, they have a distinction between attraction and arousal. You too understand that difference. If you said you were attracted to men, then that makes you gay or at least bi-sexual; but you didn't! So I wouldn't worry about it.

 
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Old 08-13-2001, 05:05 PM   #3
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Re: sexuality question

You're not gay! Gay means being able to love another man. It doesn't mean not being able to get hard for every girl you see.

I have had two lap dances in my life and didn't get hard for either of them. The women were extremely good looking and did their job well I just didn't get hard. My wife can attest to the fact that I am not gay.

 
Old 08-14-2001, 01:26 PM   #4
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Roger100 HB User
Re: sexuality question

I was a strip club once, o.k. it is not nearly the same as a lap dance. All I can say is that a friendly email from a girl that I like turned me on more than nay of the girls stripping. I do not know how I would react to a lap dance. I am sure that I would get turned on ONLY if the girl could somehow make me believe that she also likes me.

 
Old 08-16-2001, 06:57 PM   #5
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joseca HB User
Re: sexuality question

<BLOCKQUOTE><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Jude29:
<B>My wife can attest to the fact that I am not gay.</B><HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

Being able to perform well sexually with a woman, doesnt imply that one person is not gay. I'm gay, and some women I've been with considered me a good lover. Go figure...

 
Old 08-17-2001, 06:38 AM   #6
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Lance2 HB UserLance2 HB UserLance2 HB User
Re: sexuality question

Just my two cents worth here. I too have had a lap dance and it was cool and very visually stimulating, I did'nt become "aroused" though. Each of us is different and that's great, you've got nothing to worry about. Actually it sounds as if you've got some pretty healthy sexuality and a good balance on the matter. Imagine if you got aroused with everything you saw that was "arousing", you'd be "up" all the time and that could be irritating!

 
Old 08-18-2001, 03:46 AM   #7
jug jug is offline
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jug HB User
Re: sexuality question

whoa lung7793, i coulda sworn i wrote that myself. everything you wrote describes me as well (well, except for the Six Feet Under thing...but i DO like the band known as Six Feet Under, coincidence?). anyway, just thought i'd point out that i've had those same thoughts/concerns. i go to the strip club quite often and have never been aroused by one of the strippers. but the shooter girl, that's a different story...
i still haven't found a solid answer yet either.

jug

 
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