Hi guys. I have a question you may find to be a joke but I guarantee that this is not a joking question. Before I ask this question I want any women who may read this to either leave now ( you shouldn't be in this forum anyways) or keep your comment to yourselves.
I have been with 1 women all my life. I have never had sex with any other women either. I have been married now for 15 years. My question is why is it that when I have sex doggy style with my wife that there is a strong odour of "cheese". 99 percent of the time before we have sex we have a shower or bath. I find that I am so grosed out by this odour that as soon as I smell it I instantly loose my erection and it takes a while for me to get excited again. Sometimes when it has smelled bad I can come back into the room and it still stinks in there.
IS my wife not washing her *** good enough or do all women smell like this ?? Thanks
I am a woman and I am highly offended that you think you have the right to say that women shouldnt be on this board. It is a public board and shouldnt matter if it is for men's sexual health or otherwise. There are plenty of men that comment on the the women's issue boards,yet you wont see the women getting offended because the men comment there. Well there was one time but that was sorted out and a long time ago at that.
Second have you stopped to think that the smell might be coming from you?? Also many times when a couple has sex the odors that combine can be rather strong.
You really should talk to your wife to see if she notices this smell. If she has you two can talk about her using the flushable wet wipes to see if that helps if she isnt washing well enough. IF that doesnt help then seeing her doctor to see if something is off could be another option for her. A cheese smell is not a natural odor to come from a person especailly from the anus. My husband will vouche that I have never smelled like that nor has the other couple of women he has been with smelled like that.
[This message has been edited by Blastoff9600 (edited 06-22-2003).]
DS 13 yr
DS 8 yr (3+ yrs ttc)
TTC #3 since 01/02
Originally posted by justnormal: Before I ask this question I want any women who may read this to either leave now
I think not! We´re allowed to post in any forum we choose. Besides, I don´t see many MEN rushing to answer you.
Your wife is either tardy in her cleanliness, or perhaps she farts during sex in the doggy position. Does she also smell when you are performing oral sex? (Although I get the feeling this is not something you do...)
Lady here as well, and kinda laughed your comment off, as I can see your new to the boards, and will adjust.
Secondly, perhaps she isnt paying enough attention to detail when it comes to washing. I was going to then ask the same question Snazzy asked, yet I also get that same vibe, because otherwise you would know where the smell is coming from, REAL QUICK.
Anyway, open the communication up with the wife of 15 yrs , and perhaps shower together and wash one another.
I would have repied back sooner but I wanted to see how many times I get my head bit off for asking this question. I guarentee this smell is not from me! (believe it or leave) If you can imagine the situation, then tell me how you would you bring it to your spouces attention without hurting or embarrassing them? Naturelove did suggest bathing and washing each other ( I interpret that as: if you want the job done right do it yourself) When we have sex I don't orgasm in her because I don't see her vagina as being a garbage pail. ( so I pull out) I have been pulling out now for over 10 years because I wouldn't want that stuff rotting in me all day either. So. that eliminates that source of stench. And for thous of you who are confused by the term "doggie style", I'm NOT TALKING ANAL SEX ! I have noticed in the past some of her underware in the laundry having large skid marks in them. She would give our kids hell if she seen that in theirs. But like I said before, before we have sex we always have a shower or bath. So I can't understand this odour. Oh ps. Do I do oral sex? I would love to but it's too strong .
[This message has been edited by justnormal (edited 06-28-2003).]
You have alienated your best source for information (women) by your asking for them to "leave". I would think you would ask them for any ideas, being this is a woman your speaking of, whom better than other women to give you ideas on how to approach her with such a delicate subject? But a side from that, you've been married for 15 years, couldn't you come up with a caring, honest, and sincere way of talking to her about your problem with the offensive odor? Tell her you feel your sex life is being limited because of this odor you can't stand. Let her know you would enjoy going down on her, but can't get past the smell. Suggest to her what you said in your post. You feel she may need to clean herself more thoroughly around the anus. She is your wife of 15 years for cripes sake! Also I couldn't ends this without asking you, how can you refer to your ejaculate as garbage and your wife's vagina basically as a trash receptacle ? You mentioned your wife wouldn't tolerate "skid marks" in your children's underwear, so I'm assuming you have some with her, was it garbage when you let go your load to produce them? You might want to consider these to be "red flags", that you don't seem to have a very healthy perception of a woman's value and worth.
JDinCA: OK obviously you also were offended by my post. I knew this who happen. OK let's play a little game here. Pretend we are married, (keep comments to your self) now I have noticed that when we have sex there is a pungent odour of fecal matter when you remove your undies. Mostly when you turn over and spred your legs. When I smell this I immediatly lose all interest in sex with you but I know if I don't finish you will become discuraged and probally get mad at me( thinking there is another woman ). Now, I don't want to hurt your feelings but I think you should spend a little more time washing your bum and that mostly includes your anus. OK JDinCA after me as your husband saying that to you, are you now upset ? Are you embarrased? Are you hurt? Maybe your husband will say that to you some day and you can answer that for real. Or perhaps he wants to tell you that already but he doesn;t want to hurt you.
[This message has been edited by bfl (edited 06-29-2003).]
She probably has a yeast infection. She needs to see a doctor and get some medication. No not all women smell like cheese. I am surprised you asked all women to leave. We are the ones you should be asking or your doctor.
Ok justnormal......I wasn't offended but then I'm not a woman. You have made my point even more apparent, you really have no sense of how to relate to women. The last line in your reply shows it. You thought I was a woman and you did nothing but offend. I was giving you some constructive criticism about your approach for help as I saw it from a mans view. I was trying to let you know that as a man reading what you wrote in your original posting for advice, you were asking the wrong sex what you should do. By alienating women you had lost your best source for information on how to approach the subject. A woman's prospective is what you needed, but any chance of that was lost by the way you offended them. So I was merely letting you know that you might have a problem relating to woman. How, I read it. If you approached your wife the way you did these boards,you won't get anywhere,because you will hurt,and or offend her,as you did every woman that read your post. I know that if I had this problem with an odor that offended me,I would say first of all how much I loved her,then I might say,"Hunny something has been bothering me and I would like to discuss it with you". Maybe as I was helping her with the dishes, preparing our dinner, or helping her with the laundry. So she wouldn't get scared I was going to ask her for a divorce, because I was being a supportive husband as I was finding a way to approach the subject to her without wanting to hurt her feelings. I would be physically close to her as we discuss it,so she knows I'm being serious about the effect it's having on me. I would caress her arm if we're sitting and look her in the eye as I am opening up about the subject. But not wanting to risk hurting her feelings before I did bring the subject up, I might have come here to these boards not for men only to give me feedback, but to get a woman's prospective, and ask if their husbands approached them as I was planning to do with my wife, would they feel offended,would they hate him,should I drop it,not bring the subject up,or would my idea be a good way to talk to her about it? You see justnormal............why would I want to alienate and offend the sex who's opinion I needed the most.
OK , I am a phisically and mentally abused husband. That's right ladies this also happens to men too! There is no way in which I can bring this to my wife. If I tell her such a thing, even with a dozen roses and chocolates will initiate a smack. And then probally weeks of mental tourcher. OK now you know the truth. Now you know why i have such a problem "relating to women". Now tell me how I talk to a person like this ?
Counseling for yourself so you can see that a marriage with abuse no matter what form of abuse is not a marriage one stays in. Marriage counseling coudl also help as it will give you both someone to talk to without a bias. You could then learn how to talk to your spouse without offending her. But with abuse you dont need to put up with that. No one does.
And yes it is believable that it happens to guys as well as women. Just like it were a woman being abused the advice is the same LEAVE.
DS 13 yr
DS 8 yr (3+ yrs ttc)
TTC #3 since 01/02
I don't see why a person can't ask for a response from men or women only. If a woman were to say, "I want answers from women only, no men buttinskies," I'd think, "Fine, what's it to me?"
The maturity level of some of the female responders was appalling. And, the answers, once one got by the initial shock, were all over the board, which means that at least some of the women responders were incorrect in fact.
I've never smelled cheese during intercourse or while performing cunnilingus for that matter. So, I won't ask the obvious, "Like...what kind of cheese?"
Just silly, but do you know what the blind man said as he walked by the fish market?...."G' mornin' ladies." (I heard that from a woman, so, blame a woman of that is offensive to you. I find it amusing and I am spreading bad taste, so, yeah, guilty as charged.)
If your wife is abusive,mentally and physically, to you, is it the same with your children? I hope that's not too invasive a question, but if she's abusing your children as well as you, then it won't do you or your children any good to stay in that kind of an environment. If you think your marriage can be salvaged then try some counseling. Can you bring this up to your wife,or will that provoke her to hit you as well? If that's how it is,then you really need to leave her.
As for the smell,I honestly don't know what to tell you about it. Maybe you could try showering together and you wash her . . .if that was suggested already,sorry, I barely read most of the other posts.