Ok guys, I've recently got the green light from my girlfriend to explore the forbidden area. I know it needs to begin with stimulation etc but can people who have prior experience with this tell me some hinters as to how to keep her happy throughout. Im not sure what to expect but im a bum person and i think im going to like it. She was very apprehensive and its taken 2 years, a lot of talk and a lot of love to get this far - i dont want to screw it up by making her first experiene a nightmare!!
[This message has been edited by Samisunrider (edited 07-03-2003).]
Im not American for starters, im BRITISH.
And secondly this post was for advice, not for individuals to flame about their opinions of anal sex. I want to die nowing I tried EVERYTHING i wanted to try when i was younger, i may HATE it, i may LOVE it, but at the end of the day, LIVE LIFE!
Take your time. Make certain that your partner is completely aroused before you begin. Use lots of water soluable lubricant. Begin by introducing your well lubricated fingers until your partner is comfortable. When it's time to penetrate by gentle, be well lubricated, and go very slowly. If she is in any pain slow down or stop.
Also, use a condom (a well lubricated one) to lessen any chance of transmitting an STD. The walls of the rectum are very delicate and easily bruised during any form of rough anal penetration. Any break in the tissue can allow HIV or other STD's to be transmitted to your partner easily.
Finally, whether you use a condom or not, never insert your penis into your partner's vagina after it's been in her anus until it's been thoroughly washed or the condom has been removed or replaced with a fresh one (you should wash before applying a new condom too). Last thing you want to do is introduce harmful bacteria present in the rectum into your partner's vagina and cause a potentialy serious infection.
I don't think I can stress this word enough ...... LUBRICATION!!!! That is very very important. Like some of the other posters said, get her very aroused then use just your fingers. She is going to have to be totally relaxed, if she isn't it may be hard to penetrate her. Do NOT force the issue, if you get my drift, go very slowly. Tell her to tell you if it hurts too much so you can stop. This may take a few tries so don't rush it and don't be disappointed if it doesn't happen the first time.
If you start out with something big like a penis (unless you are tiny), she will probably be tense and it will hurt her and she may put a stop to if before you have barely gotten started, never to try again.
You should probably start out with a finger. If she is comfortable with a finger, then she should be more receptive to a penis. But you may wish to stick with finger the first couple of times - don't rush things.
I concur with the condom. Getting fecal bacteria in the urinary tract can cause a nasty infection.
OK, I just want to give a suggestion. It is a great idea to begin with your fingers (even if you want to put a condom on them first) and, yes, LOTS of lube!! But, please remember to TRIM THOSE FINGERNAILS!!! Hurting an aroused girl with sharp nails is like turning on a cold shower for a guy whether it is anal or vaginal.
It is the society we live in. Like I said, I come from a different type of society, where anal sex is not looked upon as a normal thing to do. this doesn't mean that people don't do it, but they wouldn't dare talk about it if they do. I also think that the popularity has to do with the fact that is featured in pornography.
JayB- I guess it is safe to assume that you are also against oral sex too, since that area wasn't cerated for sexual situations?????
to the original poster...... go for it.....but like everyone else has said, take it easy and slow, and invest in some ASTROGLIDE.......it makes all the difference in the world.
My husband wanted to try it too, and I gave him the "green light" and it took us a few tries to get it going like we wanted it, but now it is a regular part of our sex life, and we BOTH enjoy it very much.
[This message has been edited by funchick (edited 07-06-2003).]