I have now discovered why at 19 I have problems getting an erection around my gf and being able to orgasm.
The way I masterbate is I push my penis against my leg and usually reach orgasm while not totally hard. This has meant that its now the only way I can get off.
Dont get me wrong I can get it up, just not when required and never able to orgasm.
I am really quite scared because I am unable to keep a girlfriend and this could serverly limit my chances of having children.
Anyone out there with similar problems?
Anyone out there with advice?
The following user gives a hug of support to Lestat: filmgigg (03-23-2011)
Hey bud, you've got that lil guy trained to respond to a certain stimulation, that happens. I'd say that you've got to change the technique and train that lil guy to respond in other ways. Add lubrication, change your grip, style, speed, technique and such,never "get off" the same way twice in a row for a while. This may take some time so be patient, if you don't chances are you'll always have trouble with things not working as planned with her.
Hey Lestat, what lance said is exactly true. I suffered a simmiliar situation up until about a month ago. I couldnt' get off for my entire life (I'm 19). Purely a psychological problem, I basically convinced myself, subconciously, that I couldn't get off, ever. This is a almost unheard of disorder by the way, it's rare for a guy to NEVER get off in his life, and it's supposedly a very hard thing to overcome. But anyways, I just did a lot of thinking on why I was like that, and what caused me to get like that. and really, you just have to convince yourself that you can get off with a girl, in your case. I'm now perfectly fine as of 2 weeks ago, and can now get off with my g/f and am currently making up for about 7 years of time when I couldn't spank it. So some advice- Still masturbate, just don't masturbate the way you used to. IF you have to put spikes on your leg to keep from using that to get off, then do it. And it will probably take you longer to get off, so don't stop spanking it because it takes you longer to get off then if you used your leg. And when having sex with your g/f, forget about getting off as much as you can. Just try to enjoy the sex, and not look for the climax so much. IF you can't get it up, Try some viagra if you can get it. Just using that a few times is enough to overcome the mental block of impotency for many guys. So basically, what I am saying is, if i can get over my severe problem, which is supposed to be the hardest to recover from, then you surely can. You may want to see a sex therapist, they are supposed to be very helpful, although you may not think so. Look at it this way, if you had no memories of your problems with sex, then chances are, you would be able to get off with your g/f, and through "normal" masturbation. It's a psychological problem, a conditioned response. And psychological problems can be helped and fixed. And as to having children, if you can "blow your load" in one way, then you can have children. Even if you can't blow your load at all, there are still medical procedures to extract sperm and impregnate a girl. And if you are worried about being impotent and not satisfying your g/f, there is always viagra, and if you can't get off, it's better for her because you can go longer. So my best advice to you, is try to worry less and stop thinking of what you are going through. there are many other things you can do for a girl to sexually satisfy her other then penetration. YOu can get over this, but in the mean time, relax, enjoy messing around with your girl more, and stop jacking off using your leg ( a guys leg isn't very attractive anyways, now a girls leg .........) SO good luck, and don't despair, this won't be a life long thing
I did the same thing up until i was about 19 myself. I got my first girlfriend at 19 and was considering having sex with her, it was a semi long distance relationship so alot of the time we were having phone sex. I noticed during phone sex that i was never really hard because i did the same thing you did, rub it against my leg. I could climax very fast like that but it wouldnt be sufficient for intercourse. So i stopped masturbating for a week or 2. Then i started doing it the normal way. Lubrication , and the OK grip type thing , stroking etc etc. Now i dont have a problem with it.
Another thing that can increase your erection strength is jelqing. Do a search on google or something for it.
Just know your not alone and u can overcome this, and i would reccomend u do.
I couldnt get off either tho when i first had sex , im not sure if i can now, but i think i may have masturbated way to much and decreased sensitivity. Havnt found a solution yet since i havnt had sex in a while, but i did notice that at one point when i had a urinary tract infection, i stopped masturbating until i got better, then once that was done and i started again it didnt take me but a few minutes to get off. So abstaining from it can help you alot.