Hi ts10! There are so many variables in a situation like this that it is difficult to pinpoint a particular area and offer a simple solution.
Basically, it seems to me that you are trying too hard, you are too anxious and you are using your brain too much! It may well be that, in a year's time, you'll wonder why you thought you had a problem at all.
The reason I think this way is that you say, "I get really frustrated when this happens" and your topic is, "What is wrong with me?". Begin by assuming that there is NOTHING wrong with you. You actually have everything going for you: an understanding partner, a good relationship, an openness and honesty about your situation, and a willingness to find satisfaction from these things. (God, I wish I had been in your shoes at the same age!)
Take things slowly. Don't rush into bjs or sex. Take time to get used to each other's bodies and feelings. Explore! You might find that, if you take things easy, you will enjoy yourselves more. (One thing you didn't mention is what *you* have done for your partner and how she is reacting.)
I'm sorry if this hasn't helped. As I said, there are so many variables, it is impossible to give a simple answer. Have fun!
I hear the beat of a different drummer
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