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Old 09-01-2003, 02:05 AM   #1
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Wink Q for the guys from a girl about oral...

When i give my guy oral it can seem to take ages before he reaches the stage where i feel he is really turned on from it.if he hasn't had sex for a few days, he is more turned on and that is the time when i have actually managed to make him finish.But i just wondered what is an expected length of time for a guy when getting oral?

I sometimes wonder if it's ever gonna happen and i start to question my ability, it makes me feel insecure, like i'm not doing it for him.If i've been going for about 10 mins i start to think i'm not good enough,and will sometimes stop and maybe get on him so we can have intercourse or ask him to get on me.How long should i realistically be doing oral for?I also feel this way about masturbating him, as if i can't manage it as well as he can himself.I have watched his technique and tried to do it the same.I have heard that men get used to a certain way by themselves and i can see that i can't do it as he can manually...but orally?He can't do this for himself.I would gladly be there for as long as he takes to finish as i love pleasing him this way.I think it is me feeling insecure.Once he is at the stage of being really horny, i know i'm almost there and that it will happen but this insecurity comes when he hasn't reached that stage yet and i'd love to be able to get him from just hard and turned on, to mindblowingly horny and would like to know how long others take to reach that stage.

Also do guys prefer use of the hand as well?I mean is it better to just hold his penis at the base to keep it positioned while using my mouth, or is an up and down hand movement at the same time as up and down with the mouth better?

Any feedback would be appreciated, thank you

 
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Old 09-01-2003, 06:59 AM   #2
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Talk to him about it. It takes me longer to orgasm with just oral. I personally enjoy a hand & mouth combination. I don't think you could do anything "wrong" down there, having a girl that's willing to try to please her man, like you are, is what matters.
Have fun-

 
Old 09-01-2003, 10:40 AM   #3
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For some guys, seeing their partner getting aroused is part of the turn on; you know, like for the current to flow, both terminals have to be connected. In that case, it's not really a choice or a preference: he might want to get hard faster but is simply missing that final connection. The last thing you want is for him to start worrying that his lack of arousal is disappointing you because that will just send him further into his head. Some guys love blow jobs and the feeling that they are being 'serviced'; others don't like the passive detatchment, like a more 'hands on' interaction. Vary the scenario. Sounds like you won't have much trouble finding something that works

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Old 09-01-2003, 11:58 AM   #4
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Have you asked him what he likes? Why not? It's flattering to know a girl wants to please her mate like you do! Try not to be anxious about it. Maybe he just takes longer to orgasm through oral.

I've never received fellatio. I'd love to have a girl salivate down my penis, and gently masturbate me by sliding her hand on the shaft (not grabbing it) and maybe twist her grip a bit before changing directions. The saliva will become stickier and less slippery over time, so continuing to drool down the penis is a good thing!

She would synchronize her hand movements with her mouth on my head and upper shaft, swirling her tongue around the head and on the underside of it as well. I may not have a frenulum, but that spot is still quite sensitive.

I'm not very long (4.5 inches) so I imagine she might have to use a couple fingers and her thumb to masturbate me to keep room for her head down there. Occasionally, I'd love her to take as much of me as she can and maybe hold it there. Aah, what fun. I can't wait to find a girlfriend now.

See? What (I think) I enjoy may be different from your man or other guys on these boards.

[This message has been edited by Darkfur (edited 09-01-2003).]

 
Old 09-01-2003, 02:21 PM   #5
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I also take a looooooong time to reach orgasm when my GF sucks me. I used to think it was a problem, but not any more. Here's why:

In our early days together, in the middle of a great blow job, I'd start worrying that I was taking too long. I was concerned that my GF would get tired or bored or frustrated or get a jaw cramp or something.

And as soon as that thought entered my brain, BANG! That delicious feeling of impending orgasm would recede and the blow job would take even longer. Vicious cycle...

When we talked about it, my GF emphasized two things:

A) she gets as much out of giving me head as I do getting it, and

B) if she needs to stop for whatever reason, she will - no big deal.

Now, thanks to that discussion, I'm able to "let go" - I lie back and enjoy my GF's beautiful mouth on me. If I know I won't be able to c*m in her mouth that night I'll let her know. Often she'll keep sucking for awhile anyway - just because she enjoys it so much!

If you enjoy giving your man head, maybe he needs to hear a similar message from you: relax... enjoy...

Cheers.

(PS, in my opinion it feels better when my GF uses her hand in combination with her mouth. She sometimes uses a flavoured lube on her hand as well, which adds to the amazing feeling!)
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Old 09-01-2003, 04:24 PM   #6
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Oral sex is not the be all and end all for men. I have only reached climax ONCE through oral sex (best bl00dy orgasm I ever had )

Dont read to much into it, for men its more about visual stimulants, and theres not much to look at with you on your knees. Try 69's

 
Old 09-01-2003, 04:35 PM   #7
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I think the answer to your question is in what you wrote about masturbating your b/f. It's probably true that most guys can orgasm more quickly if they masturbate themselves. This is simply because they will apply whatever level of pressure or speed of stroke that feels best to bring them to orgasm.

They do become used to that...so when you masturbate him, even if you have watched him to it it still isnt the same. (I am not saying that having a women performing the masturbation or oral isnt a much more pleasurable thing than doing it ones self.) It's simply a matter of it taking longer to reach the point of orgasm because the sensations aren't what the body is used to.

Oral is great and extremely pleasureable but not every man will be able to reach orgasm just from oral. The combination of performing oral while masturbating the penis and/or fondling his testicles is much more stimulating.

 
Old 09-02-2003, 06:16 PM   #8
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Some men can climax more easily via oral, and many others have difficulties. The technique of the woman may be a factor, or it might be some other issue with the man. Some men prefer going deep, while others like more action around the head. Some like it when she uses her hands, for others this is a distraction. Talk to him and experiment as to what feels best, as some guys will not tell you unless you ask.

As for hand jobs, many men find them more exciting, while others will have trouble. If you get behind your guy and masturbate him in the manner he does himself, it may help. If you are in front of him of to his side, your grip will be different than what he is used to.

 
Old 09-03-2003, 01:50 AM   #9
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The suggestion to get behind him to masturbate him is very good, i often thought the postion of me next to him would change the way it feels as my hand is positioned differently to his.So this would remedy it.Although i must say, he masturbates me differently to the way i do alone, but it is betterfor me when he does it cos i am more turned on by the fact that it is him doing it, and everything i feel when we are together.As for the oral, another question.
Wht do some of you say you cannot *** from oral?Is it just not enough stimulation?I thought it was every mans fantasy.Just goes to show that stuff we see in porn is not always the norm for most men.

 
Old 09-03-2003, 04:06 PM   #10
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Men love it, but the sensations are not always intense enough to achieve orgasm, or the woman gives up before he can build up to an orgasm. A vagina provides a lot more lubrication and surface area to stimulate the penis. If the woman is able to get the right contact and firmness, that often helps. Ask him what he likes and listen to his moans of pleasure for feedback.

 
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