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Old 01-28-2013, 08:40 AM   #1
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delayed ejaculation..plz give ur suggestions

i got married last year december and on first night my wife had lot of pain during sex so i decided to reduce the frequency of sex and we only had once a day for almost 10 days, that also not very exciting as my wife was complaining of pain evrytime and my whole mind was working on not to give her much pain.

i didnt use condoms as i want to enjoy real sex instead i used to withdraw from her at climax and than ejaculate outside. after that i almost lost to ejaculate in her and even i took enough time but evrytime failed to ejaculate and then i hv to masturbate even to ejaculate outside.

this whole thing is continuous and i am losing interest in having sex with my wife.i sometime has to fantasize some other women to ***.

i have huge sex drive and get a good erection and love to have sex but after getting in her i loose my erection after sometime as she dont give any response during sex other than giving expression of pain that is continuous after our marriage. she even dont have orgasm not even after masturbate.
when i m willing to have sex she postpone it because of fear of pain.

i am really confused what to do. all of this is leading to my delayed ejaculation and loss of sex drive with her.

Last edited by dudy; 01-28-2013 at 08:42 AM.

 
Old 01-28-2013, 08:36 PM   #2
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Re: delayed ejaculation..plz give ur suggestions

I'll start with my really short answer just about the sexual things. I think you should probably make whispering or some other kind of verbal feedback part of your bedroom routine especially so that you are more aware of how she feels and also lubricant should help a lot, but the biggest thing is to make your wife feel comfortable. She obviously has not been feeling comfortable in the bedroom.

It sounds like besides the sexual problem, your bigger problem must be communication. And I say that because you haven't said anything about what she's said (about anything). Couples need to work together to solve their problems. This is usually no more difficult than expressing ourselves better and encouraging our partner to do so as well. You must both be keeping things to yourselves instead of telling the other.

More specifically about the sexual problem, it sounds like you might not be appreciating how very delicate to roughness a woman can feel. The slight friction that may barely feel noticeable to you can feel very painful to more sensitive genitals. The extremely sensitive skin of the vagina can catch with even slight friction--especially at intromission. Friction can feel very irritating with immediate stinging and sometimes a bit more lasting duller burning. ("Intromission" is a less racy word for penetration.) You need to avoid this especially at the beginning or it can make sex painful for all the rest of it.

The biggest thing is probably that you need to be making her feel more comfortable. She is not doing more in the bedroom because she is not comfortable--let alone enjoying herself. If you're not putting any effort into getting her excited about things prior to the actual coital part of the act, that could explain this.

Last edited by mc7; 01-28-2013 at 08:42 PM.

 
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Old 01-29-2013, 08:33 AM   #3
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Re: delayed ejaculation..plz give ur suggestions

thanx buddy for such a nice explanation and suggestion.

when i am with my wife i take a lot of time in foreplay but when i touch her bottom she feel dry , i mean there is no lubrication but when we had at our first night she was moist and bit enjoying but in recent events she is not responding for even foreplay and i encourage her a lot by saying that its normal for women not to have orgasm and feel pain but she thinks that she is not able to satisfy me and i always say that i enjoy a lot with u and i hv never seen such a beautiful women and she feel happy that i like her and i do really.

may be she is in fear of pain even during foreplay that the next step is going to be painful and she loose interest. i think so.

now she is not with me and is away for two months to work. may be things will change with next meeting.

 
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