I am 17 my partner 23. we r both virgins but i feel ready for sex. His penis will not go in my vagina, simple said lol.
The pain is strange, you know the pain you get when you pull your mouth wide? you get that stretching pain? well thats what it feels like on my vagina? although its my first time i can see i may never enjoy sex, ever!
My partner can put 2 fingers inside my vagina but get no stimulation off that and it still hurts.
Hi jemgas, first time is always hard. You has to be extremely relaxed and lubricated. Two fingers is not enough, penis girth is much more than that. Try to use some water base lubricating cream. Also, you need to check he is going in the right direction, sometimes it can enter in the wrong direction (not in wrong place).
Also remember, as you are virgin, that your hymen can be very strong and as he also is virgin, he has no other experience in penetrating a woman so you need to look your way to help him and he to help you. It can take some few weeks if you are very tight.
Hey jemgaz,
I had the same problem when i first tried to have sex, went through quite a few condoms just trying to get in and not succeeding! He couldn't even get two fingers in to start with cos it was way too painful so you're ahead already.
Good luck and be safe.
Last edited by bfl; 11-10-2003 at 11:37 PM.
Reason: instructional how-to's are not allowed
I know exactly what your going through. I have tried having an intercourse 6 times and i still cant get his penis in. And im 22.
I think I might have a condition called vaginismus. Have you heard of it??Vaginismus is a much more common problem than woman may realize. But before you start panicing its almost always curable.
Vaginismus is an involuntary spasm or contraction of the muscles surrounding the vaginal opening, making penetration of the penis into the vagina very painful or even impossible. Much like the way an eyelid closes when
something comes to close to the eye or a muscle flinches in response
to an imminent punch, vaginismus is like a vaginal flinch. Women who suffer from vaginismus are capable of becoming sexually aroused, achieving lubrication, and even orgasm through other stimulation.
Do you anticipate pain?? If so, you need to learn to RELAX and try not to think about it so much. vaginismus is mainly of psychological rather than physical origin, its just tense. Fear makes the vagina tighten up so that it's almost closed and nothing can get in. Before having an intercourse have a long hot bath to relax your vaginal muscles, also light candles, dim the lights and listen to some soft music - it helps!
Try to learn how to control and relax the muscle, which can be done in different ways. .
You have to increase the communication between your boyfriend too. If your still having problems speak to your doctor.
Hope this helps.
Last edited by bfl; 11-10-2003 at 11:30 PM.
Reason: instructional how-to's are not allowed
black_eyes...thankx for your reply, i may go to the docs about that vaginismus because the symptoms you were explaining are identical. The thing about your eye automatically closing when it sees light is exactly what happened down there.
I am so scared of pain so what you said is totally true for me.
black_eyes...thankx for your reply, i may go to the docs about that vaginismus because the symptoms you were explaining are identical. The thing about your eye automatically closing when it sees light is exactly what happened down there.
I am so scared of pain so what you said is totally true for me.
Thankyou for addressing the problem.
Love Jemma xxxx
Hey Jemma,
It's been abt a month since you last wrote, but I only read your message today. I have the EXACT same problem as you. I'm like sooo scared of the pain that even the thought of it makes me feel pukey. On top of that, I had my first pap smear recently - OUCH! A nightmare! The doc couldn't even complete it properly, I was in such a pathetic state of pain. She recommended that I try using tampons with lots of lubrication. But I haven't even done that yet. I feel like I'm putting off things for as long as possible, and that in itself makes me more nervous about all this. I was wondering how things turned out for you? Did you go to the doc for your problems - did it help? Are you a happy, cured person now??
-Me!
Try so hard but no success 
