Help!Men suck, heeeellllllllpp!*sniffle* - Sexual Health - Teens Message Board

DrAgOn_LiLy_QuEen · 11-01-2002, 07:06 PM

I always get pressured to messing around and going past my limits, and after i feel so dirty and used and stupid. Help how can I stop? I hate it but i try to stop and say I'm just doing first base and maybe second which is nothing below the waist but i always do and then i feel awful and dirty and guilty and used and i have a probleming with cybering too PLEASE HEEEELLLLLLLLPPP*sniffle* *cries*

NugIsHere · 11-02-2002, 02:08 AM

Hey Dragon... Ok, this might sound rude, but that's not my intentions. There's one word for you to stop this from happening..the word is "no". I know its hard to say when youre in the moment, but later it will make you feel better. I totally relate with you on this, and i know how it feels to feel dirty after not saying no. I tell my best friend everything and I just wrote her a card saying "You have more respect for me than i have for myself". Since i wrote that card, it's really made me think about the whole "guy situation". I don't know what you do, but do you tell the guy before you hook up what you want to do?? with me, i dont like to plan things..so i just say whatever happens... and if you have said no to a guy and he continues to do whatever, then he has no respect for you either and you need to get out of that before you get raped. I know it's hard to say no when you're having a good time. But when you do say no to a guy before it gets too far, trust me, afterwards, you'll feel so much better, i promise..!! Good luck

-Nug http://www.healthboards.com/ubb/dizzy.gif

the_old_soldier · 11-02-2002, 03:15 PM

Thoughts:
1) Find a person who can be a friend; the friendship then could lead to a relationship.

2) Try and build YOUR self confidence. In that way, you can control the situation more. YOU might want to consider learning women's self-defense. In that way you CAN control the situation when the guy goes too far.

PiePants · 11-03-2002, 07:03 PM

You should feel dirty; you were used. However it can be solved by being more confident. Guys should respect you for who you are, not whether they can get past second base.

Tsk tsk....such bad boys out there. I no like either.

Nonexist · 11-04-2002, 07:21 AM

This is the kind of thing that makes me sad to hear. What you have to avoid is waking up one day and realizing that you've had 20 different guys (not necessarily sex), how dirty would you feel then? A respectable man doesn't respect a girl who's been around - so you'll be in a situation where the only guys who will even talk to you just wanna have sex with you. Please understand that now is when you have to stand up for yourself. The fact that you are concerned about this says that you are smart enough to see that.

Those dirty, used, and stupid feelings you mention have a purpose. They are your conscience saying, "Hey, this is not right." The more you ignore those feelings, the worse you feel about yourself. The worse you feel about yourself, the more you'll hurt yourself with this behaviour. It gets harder and harder to stop the longer you keep it up.

Take Care

NonExist