Okay, I've been with my girlfriend for three months, but we've been liking each other for four years. We love each other unconditionally and have been talking about having a baby. Idk what my parents would say, or how they would react to me even saying i want to have a baby. I need some help. I have no clue of what to do.
PS. when me and my girl have sex we do not use protection.
It is not wise to have a baby until you are old enough, mature enough, and financially able on your own to provide for a wife and baby.
It is not fair for a baby to arrive in this world without a stable home and proper care, etc. We should never bring a child into this world and expect grandparents to raise and financially care for them. It is the parents responsibility to care for their own children from A to Z.
Why not wait until you are married, employed, etc. before bringing a child into this world.
Please use protection and postpone thoughts of pregnancy until you are able to provide the above.
You are not thinking logically, so anything we tell you here about how things are going to actually turn out won't help. If you happen to have a moment of clear sanity, please talk to a responsible adult about this insane practice you are engaging in. Having a baby ain't nothing like it is in the movies.
The fact that neither you or your girlfriend are using protection when having sex just proves that neither of you are mature enough to have a child.
Anyone can make a baby...a real parent plans and acts responsibly and makes sure the child will be unconditionally loved and not the product of someone's lust and irresponsibility and "just want to have a baby"!
What was the new figure for the amount of money it takes to get a child to age 18....quarter million plus???? And that's minor compared to the time you spend. Have a baby as a teen and kiss the parties goodbye, get ready to work 1, 2 or 3 jobs for the next 19 years to make ends meet. Get ready to spend endless nights up......not partying but holding a sick child or a child who can't sleep. Get ready for lots of poop and pee and vomit...the staples of baby life.
You will never work harder at anything in your life than you do the first few years of a child's life. And when that part is over, they really hard work begins...raising a teenager who won't listen to you.....we EARN the gray hairs and wrinkles we get!
Having a baby means turning your entire life over to care for this tiny soul and if you aren't ready to give up your entire life for the job, don't take it on.
Last edited by Mod-S4; 02-21-2012 at 08:43 PM.
Reason: Reference to deleted text removed.
I am a Grandma of a Teen parent .. my child is now 24.. when he finally came to me and told me he and his gf are pregnant -- the curled up into my lap crying! They had to grow up to fast .. and soon after another baby came ... they could not of made it without our help! -
IT was selfish of them to have sex at this time in their life and in our state Illegal -- Our son was younger .. we could of pressed charges on her and had her as a sex offender the rest of her life -- we would not of done this as we love her as our own!
They themselves tell kids all the time to grow up, get educated before you think about being this serious ..
and if your dating 3 months and having sex - unprotected ......... shows lots of irresponsibility .. Take the time to grow up yourself ..enjoy life ..learn from it .. babys are lots of work -- and beyond popular demand the state does not give you everything you need .....and often there are medical bills the state will not cover .. thus leaving this on the parents! Not to mention WIC and other sources do not cover all the childs food needs!!!
If you Love her .. Love her ENOUGH to make better decisions .. Love her enough to lay off the sex and learn to communicate without your bodies!
After hearing all of this, would you please come back and talk to us? What is it that you think a baby would help you with? As you can see, bringing a baby into this world takes a lot of planning, thought and foresight. Can you share you feelings now that you have heard some answers to your question?
Please protect the girl you love...pregnancy is a something you need to protect your girlfriend from..just the mental aspects are enough to ruin her life. Please stop having unprotected sex...both your lives depend on it...
I cannot tell you it's right or wrong. You did not provide a reliable information to us, such as you're a wealthy kid which has no trouble in funding your incoming family or capable of hiring baby sitters, or sort of.
Well, it's your life. We, in internet, do not know how or what condition you are. So, it's hard to judge it's a go or not.
Since you had talked this both sides, with your girlfriend, I only had some advices for you;
Prepare yourself, be a responsible father to your kids, a lovely and understanding husband to your wife. Be smart financially.
Oh last word, sex may be different after you have a baby, be wiseful for keeping balance and harmonic pattern in your incoming family.
Good luck with that.
The cost of bearing a child starts when the baby is alive in his mother, next the bearing, milk(this one is great), diapers, not school yet.
Last edited by Mod-S4; 11-28-2012 at 05:00 PM.
Reason: Unnecessary comment removed.