orgasm HELP - Sexual Health - Teens Message Board

megjoy · 09-27-2003, 04:43 PM

Hey all. I am 17 adn have been sexually active since 14. I was never able to orgasm but lately have come close, i think. I did not like sex early in my years hence stopped untill just recently and its been great. The mental part is i love this guy adn never liked the other i realised.
Back to the question, i cant fully achieve an orgasum during sex. i know this is common but my boyfriend also touches the clitoris (very sensitive, ticklish sensation and helps majorly with my almost achieveing orgasm) along with intercourse and that is amazing but never completes. I think mainly it might be b/c he either loses the spot or just i cant climax. this then frustrates me into not even wanting to orgasm. HELP! how can either i achieve oragsm withmore work myself, or how can he more easily keep a steady rythm to get me there!

Blastoff9600 · 09-27-2003, 05:31 PM

Well you need to know what works for you. Second you should be able to talk to your bf about what works for you. If he moves his hand the wrong way then tell him. Or you can guide him and show him what works for you.
The main key is though you have to relax. The harder you try for an orgasm the less likely it will happen.

megjoy · 09-29-2003, 07:22 PM

He knows what i want, we talk a lot so thast all good. When he is doing a great job the problem then is me being mental..any ideas to help me to relax and just let it happen? I try to just let go lay dwn and let it be but its not working!!

Meg28 · 09-30-2003, 04:48 AM

Have you orgasmed from masturbation? If not, this is the best way to get to know your body and learn how much pressure you like, what kind of pressure, etc.
Once you are able to achieve an orgasm then you can bring this new knowledge to your boyfriend. Mentally, you may be able to relax a little bit because you KNOW that you can orgasm. A lot of women have a hard time because they're so focused on trying to have an orgasm, and not focusing on the pleasure that they are receiving. Or they think that the guy wants you to hurry up, or you're self conscious about your body. The list goes on. Mentally we can do damage.
Try fantasizing as well when he's stimulating you. Try and think of a very sexy thing and that will take your mind off of the nagging worries.
Also, you may benefit from the use of a vibrator. Many women have had their first orgasms with them. And I'm talking about 50 year old women who never thought they could ever orgasm.
Good luck! You'll get over the hurdle with a little practice!

mlgable · 09-30-2003, 10:53 AM

The poster is right on the money? Do you orgasm with masturbation? If not then you need to explore your body more on your own to find out what makes you orgasm and then teach this to your boyfriend. If you do orgasm with masturbation then SHOW your boyfriend what makes you orgasm. There is no way he can possibly know what makes you orgasm if you don't show him.