getting myself off - Sexual Health - Women Message Board

Oblio · 12-25-2003, 05:42 PM

i love sex, and masturbation is a great alternative, but i've noticed i can't get myself off by using my hands. i've gotta use a toy. when i'm intimate with a guy he's got no difficulties getting me off with his hands, but i just can't get myself off with my hands. is this wierd? it never bothered me until the other week when i was with my guy he wanted me to rub on my own clit while he watched, and it did nothing for me, if anything it turned the heat down.

obwon · 12-26-2003, 06:33 AM

Keep in mind that it is not uncommon to have this happen. It is not a problem, it is just that you are used to your own hands touching your body and there for it is not stimulating to you. it is like getting your back scratched and enjoying the feel. but if you try to do anything like that to yourself, it is not as enjoyable. That is why the toys are so helpful. you can feel the toy but it cant feel you.. ( like a guys touch). Nothing wrong with that and as for the boyfriend or hubby wanting you to rub yourself. trust me, it is a HUGE turn on for us.. If you want him to be "in the mood" and give you great sex, just try and act like it feels good. tell him things that he enjoys hearing. Trust me, if he is anything like most men, you wont be rubbing it for long. He will want in and it will be great.

Enjoy,

MrNice · 12-27-2003, 11:49 AM

It could be that you have just become so used to the intense stimulation you get with a toy while masturbating that the stimulation you give yourself with your hand isnt sufficient to bring on an orgasm.

Probably you are more turned on when your b/f masturbates you so you are able to become aroused more easily.

You can "retrain" yourself to not need the toy by limiting its use and enjoying more manual stimulation assuming that is something you want to do.

texasangel518 · 12-28-2003, 10:52 PM

Hey...
I have that same problem... but I don't like the way it feels in there... a turn off for me. So what I do, when I'm with my boyfriend, and he wants to "watch", I use my toys.. ***** for him is a big turn on. I think guys just like to watch a girl get off by themselfs.
And when I'm alone, I don't use my hands at all, just my toy. I found it works great,, and have no problem with it

I have found the ones that vibrate are much better

Sorry if this did'nt do much help... i saw the topic and thought I would put my 2 cents in

good luck!!
~Jessica..
ohh and but the way I love how the guys reply... thanks it really helps us girls on the way you see things

keep it up!!

Oblio · 12-29-2003, 08:35 PM

the thing is, i couldnt get myself off manually before i even started using toys. it definitely gets me off when he does it. i just wanted to make sure its not wierd. when he wants me to do it during sex so he can watch what should i do though? i dont have a problem with it, except that it doesnt do anything for me, so if i do it for more than a few seconds (which is what he wants) then my turn on starts turning off. i dont even use my toys that often b/c i dont want to desensitise myself to sex. so on average i only use it once every other month. thanks for the imput guys (and gals

)