Extreme pain-- losing virginity
I feel a bit naive asking this, but.. My boyfriend and I have been together for a few years, and recently we decided to try to have sex. I'm old enough and ready emotionally and all of that, but my body seems to violently protest, despite how many positions we try. Now, I realize that a bit of pain is normal for the first time. However, we've tried about 3 times now, and I've yet to actually be penetrated at all--- yet there's *already* a great amount of pain just in doing that. It just won't penetrate. All I feel is an extremely painful [and I'm not exaggerating-- it HURTS] pushing feeling. And though my mind would be relatively calm [if not very frusturated], my whole body would sometimes begin shaking/trembling, but that's beside the point.. Is all of that pain normal, when there's not even any penetration? Is there a reason it's not working, or will we have to be flat out brutal for this to ever work..? I'm a bit confused.
(As for a bit of background info, though I'm not sure it's relevant or not, but.. I've always had little to no sex drive. Or rather, I can rarely feel anything and so I never masturbate.)