Re: im just shocked
I must be the odd one out. I've tried 4 different brands of BC pills and none of them killed my libido. The only difference the pills made to me was that one gave me migraines after about 8months, the next one swelled my breasts up so much that i was in chronic pain 24/7 and couldn't take my bra off, the other two gave me depressed moods where i'd easily feel sad all the time, but sex was never a problem.
One thing BC pills affect BIG time is your vitamin B groups, so anybody on these pills should be taking a daily multi B Vitamin. So try giving the BC pills and vitamin B a go for a while.
You said that before he moved in everything was fine, but after he moved in you didn't like him touching you. Believe it or not, guys can be sensitive to this and they sense when something isn't right in the bedroom. Could this be a case of you liking him when he wasn't there, but now that he is there he doesn't excite you quite as much? I don't understand why you wouldn't want him touching you and this is before your illness and before you found any porn.
It's understandable that when you go from a long distance relationship to being together 24/7 that things will settle physically to some degree. When it's long distance you are always on a high b/c you hardly see each other and you always want each other. When you finally get together you begin getting used to each other and you probably pick up on little things about each other that you aren't totally crazy about and they can affect the way you feel about each other and it can lead to issues in the bedroom.
Then you had your medical issues so it's understandable you wont feel like sex and he ought to understand this. Believe it or not, most guys will look at porn if they aren't getting any/much sex. It can be hard to understand, but females can masterbate without looking at porn, they simply feel horny and do what has to be done. No guy i have known ever works that way. They always need to be mentally stimulated to achieve their orgasm. I'd much rather my partner look at porn to achieve his orgasms than go trawling through bars and finding a real life person to get physical with.
I think the two of you really need to sit down and talk about things which are affecting you as a couple. Maybe prior to moving in together some of your thoughts maybe have been a little unrealistic, maybe you need to communicate about sexual needs, how you want it, when you want it etc etc. When getting together with someone new and living with them too it can be a bit rough first as you have a lot to get used to and the sex can take a while to fall into place.