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-   -   Can't Reach Orgasm. PLEASE help! (http://www.healthboards.com/boards/sexual-health-women/818954-cant-reach-orgasm-please-help.html)

sammie14 10-23-2010 11:03 AM

Can't Reach Orgasm. PLEASE help!
 
First time poster here. I'm not really sure how to put everything I want to say so I apologize ahead of time for all the incoherent rambling this will probably seem like and for all the...details. I appreciate any input. Thanks!

I don't know what's wrong but I have never been able to reach orgasm. Whenever someone else or myself plays with my clitoris I get really close but can never actually get off. When I'm having sex though, I never even come close. I mean I really enjoy sex and it's still pleasurable for me but I just don't come close.

Only one time did I come close and it was with a guy who I had been having sex with for awhile. We weren't together. It was more than friends with benefits but we weren't actually committed because we were both scared to be I think (which I do not recommend, it just ends up badly).

Anyway, I think we both started to feel something for each other..well more than something.. and I came close.

So really what I'm trying to say is that in order for me to reach orgasm would I have to feel strongly about someone. I know everyone is different in how they are able to reach orgasm so I'm wondering if this is how it has to be for me. I'm hoping because It would be nice to reach an orgasm for once.

scentsyfavored 10-23-2010 07:08 PM

Re: Can't Reach Orgasm. PLEASE help!
 
its was hard for me @ 1st until i experimented with myself...over and over it takes time sometimes, but you'll get it!

Searchin 10-23-2010 07:39 PM

Re: Can't Reach Orgasm. PLEASE help!
 
It takes at least twenty minutes for a woman to reach orgasm. Make sure you have lots of foreplay and take it really slow with no pressure. I mean don't keep thinking about whether you are going to orgasm or not. You could stimulate yourself while your partner is thrusting inside you. Try doing it with your partner behind you. Sometimes it is easier that way. Remember. it takes at least twenty minutes before you will be ready to orgasm unless it has been awhile since you had sex. It might be a different story then. Sincerely, searchin

sammie14 10-24-2010 06:54 PM

Re: Can't Reach Orgasm. PLEASE help!
 
Thanks for the advice Searchin! I'll try to keep all this in mind next time and not worry about having one. I usually don't worry too much about it during sex but I guess I just don't work myself up enough. I do find that my mind wanders a lot during the deed so maybe I just need to try and stay completely in the moment. I don't know. I really appreciate the help though!

Searchin 11-05-2010 08:16 AM

Re: Can't Reach Orgasm. PLEASE help!
 
Women, it has been found, tend to think about other things when they are having sex. It seems it is harder for a woman to put her job, stress, housework, etc. on the back burner. It is so important to just relax, take time out for this marvelous event! searchin

AceofHearts 11-11-2010 08:56 PM

Re: Can't Reach Orgasm. PLEASE help!
 
(sorry if this is a little explicit)

I had this problem for a while when I started having sex; it felt good but I could tell not as good as he felt when he finished. I've been with that one and only guy for 4 yrs now and I couldn't really orgasm vaginally for at least a year...But I did notice my clitoris is extra sensitive so we had fun that way. Sex remained good but not fantastic because he wouldn't last long enough for me to orgasm so we would just do it again and it felt much better. Personally, I do think sex is about the emotion and how much you care about your partner. The first thing that helped me orgasm vaginally was to moan low and deeply and that seems to keep your mind focused or something. Also, I never thought I would buy a 'toy' but I did, a vibrator, and I would definitely recommend this (I can't stop orgasming :D).

Good luck!


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